Lassie, Lassie, Go Save Timmy!

Tags

Election 2012, Fox News, GOP, Herman Cain, Media, Sarah Palin, teabaggers, Tim Pawlenty, Women's issues

I mean, there can be no sadder soul (besides the ever griftin’ Sarah) than our dear boy Timmy. Or T-Paw to us political junkies.

Never was there a man who was so inept in judging the future. First of all, he puts all his chips into one state, where he could not hope to out-spend  Michele, the wild-eyed Mina-SO-tan.

It doesn’t help that T-Paw has all the charisma of a deer tick at a Deep Woods Off convention.

I mean T-Paw looks in a mirror each morning and wonders why he should bother.

He shouldn’t.

So after prematurely ejaculating his presidential hopes after losing the “straw” counting summer fun in Iowa, T-Paw looked around to see who he might bore next.

Weeks later, good old slipper T, realized his faux pax as one after another of the presidential beggars, soared in the polls.

“I coulda been a contenda'” he moaned.

And lord knows it would have done ever so much for his book sales, which is why most of them (save perennial presidential wannabe Mittens) entered the race in the first place.

So then T-Paw moved inexorably down the fatal path of destruction. As if led by a gaggle of evil spirits, he is unable to grasp the right brass ring, coming up again and again with iron.

He decides to back the front-runner, Mittens. He thought that was a sure thing.

He failed to estimate the degree to which the conservative Gollums of the GOP HATE Mittens.

Now it looks like Mittens may fail in his second bid to be king of the mountain, and with it, T-Paws hopes of a continuing paycheck, as Secretary of something-or-other. Such a sad story.

♦

Meanwhile, back at the political party at the end of the universe: the GOP.

What is 15: 7?

The number of available girl-pals (wives or otherwise) spread among the seven male candidates. We left Michele out of this, though goodness knows she might have had a dalliance or 27 given Marcus’ swishy ways.

The winner of course is our very own Hermie who now faces allegations of a 13-year affair to go with the claims of harassment by 4 other women. Hermie says, “here we go again”. It’s not clear if he is referring to the continuing female pop-ups, or to if this is his rally cry to women in bed.

For the record Herm says it’s “all a lie”. He says he will not get out of the race “as long as his wife is behind me.” Dude, that is the problem. She needs to be in front of you, and between you and anything with girl parts.

And Herm’s wife sees the lightbulb go on and realizes finally why she has been plagued by vaginal infections for years.

Duh.

♦

Proof that a little knowledge is no knowledge at all?

Fairleigh Dickenson University did some polling among New Jerseyans and found that the Sunday talk shows do most to inform people. And then there is Fox. Those who watch Fox are less informed than those who watching NOTHING. Asking a broad range of questions about Syria and Egypt, the poll discovered that reading of national newspapers and listening to NPR also pushed up the numbers of those who were “knowledgable”. When it came to OWS, John Stewart watchers knew more, and oddly MSNBC watchers thought the protesters were Republicans!

♦

Quote of the day:

Half of them think like Michelle Bachmann and the other half are afraid of being primaried by someone who thinks like Michele Bachmann. — Barney Frank, on Congressional Republicans

♦

Stolen from Hysterical Raisins:

Pretty darn cute huh? Pretty darn accurate.

Oh and don’t miss this:

It comes from the Blaze.

But I have no question about its authenticity.

It is a walking advertisement for the immediate passage of a constitutional amendment barring women from voting, or working in jobs higher than cashier.

These are the women who give women a bad name.

These are our secret shame:

The Clare Booth Luce Policy Institute and Human Events, join forces to present “the most influential conservative women in the US.”  (drum rolls are appropriate, and do add some trumpets)

1. Sarah Palin. Whirlwind mama Wasilla gal. Long time grifter, dreamer of dreams. Role model to no one. She reduces politics and world affairs to nothing more than “gotcha” questions, offered to up-end her apple cart. She thought she had you with lipstick on a pig.
2. Michele Bachmann. Wild-eyed crazy woman, who is ordered around by pseudo-gay husband Marcus. She knows what should go on in your bedroom, your uterus, and in your school room. Hint: it’s got to do with Jesus and Armageddon. History comes straight from David Barton. Founding Father, John Quincey Adams, ya know, the one who fought against slavery.
3. Phyllis Shlafly. Has been fighting against women’s rights for decades, all the while traveling around the country, making money, and not staying home pregnant and cooking as she claims all normal women should want to be. Don’t do what I do, do what I say!
4. Ann Coulter. Keeps writing books that nobody reads. Nobody pays her any mind any more. She has to now fight for even more outlandish things to say in order to be ignored. She thinks she’s attractive, while Michelle Malkin knows she’s not.
5. Michelle Malkin. Just another outrageous pundit from the moon. Michelle never met a Democrat that was worth keeping alive. She lives in a universe when up is down, down, is up, and Michelle has the microphone. She loves being the center of attention, and is pissed  she got beat out again by Ann Coulter.
6. Bay Buchanan. Never heard of her.
7. Marji Ross. Never heard of her. (But Newty praises her, so she must be an idiot.)
8. Cleta Mitchell. Never heard of her.
9. Michelle Easton. Never heard of her (But they favor women named Michelle and this one is head of one of the co-founders of the award, so the fix was in.)
10. Star Parker. I thought this was Star Jones, and I know of her, but not this Parker gal. I think they ran out of women and just made her up.
11. (Honorary) Margaret Thatcher. Oh leave the poor woman alone. She would find all of this group an embarrassment.

Return to your regular programing.

 

We’re Still Here?

Tags

"the hat", Beatrice, environment, global warming, GOP, Humor, Israel, Middle East, Mitch Daniels, Palestine, rapture, religion, Tim Pawlenty, tornadoes, weather

Photo credit: Adam Baron

Well, thankfully, we took lawn chairs. I mean Saturday for the Rapture. We were up on the hill, standing, and then sitting. Checking the watch. We clasped hands at :30 seconds and counting. And then. . . N O T H I N G.

At first, utter terror grabbed my heart. Oh no, was there some bureaucratic snafu? Had our names been left off by some angelic error? I commenced to clacking my ruby-red shoes again and again. To no avail.

We wondered, should we run back to the house and get in the basement? But all was eerily quiet and well, you might even say serene. No shaking, no erupting cacophony of earth-splitting horrors.

Finally, dejectedly, we wandered back to the house, flipped on the TV and found everything pretty much the same.

“Damn it!” the Contrarian exclaimed.

“What?”

“We missed the Preakness. Wonder who won?” he muttered.

“I can top that,” I intoned.

“How’s that?”

“On Monday, I’m back to what is increasingly as boring as paint drying–the GOP field of candidates!” I sighed.

♦

No doubt the poor people of Joplin, MO thought the Rapture might have been just delayed as they saw their town torn apart by a killer tornado yesterday. These monster storms are taking a toll across the country, and one has to go back to pre-1950 times to find these kind of death tolls. That means the storms are more ferocious, since warning systems and structures are certainly much better today. But there ain’t no global warming of course. No that is not possible.

♦

Does anyone care that Mitch Daniels is out and Tim Pawlenty is in? It’s really hard to. Theories abound as to why the “better?” candidates are opting out and the idiots are taking center stage. The most likely scenario is that they figure that Obama is nearly a sure bet. Re-focus on 2016. Maybe. If so, it promises to be a yawner except for the humor factor if Bachmann and Palin, join the other loonies Cain, Santorum, and Gingrich. Even then, it’s hard to get enthused. Or maybe I’m just off my game today. **shrug**

♦

 

Proof that I am sane and the world is crazy? One need go no further than a few weeks ago when I named the hat worn by Princess Beatrice at the William and Kate wedding as the “Bullwinkle Hat.”

Said “hat” sold on Ebay for $130,000 big ones. Need I say more?  

Truly, the more I look, the easier it is to find evidence that I am one of the few remaining sane humans on this planet.

Newt Gingrich. Need I say more?

I can go on like this all day. I deserve some kind of recognition for my ability to retain my mind in good working order when faced with this kind of insanity provoking nuttery. I do.

♦ 

I confess to not understanding all the intricacies of the Middle East peace process. But over the years, my sympathies have shifted more to the Palestinian side of things. I certainly don’t like Hamas’s tactics, but I think the Palestinians have a better claim on the land than do the Israelis. Fair reading of the Bible must leave a person with a certain amount of “well that’s a convenient way to tell the story and justify war and genocide isn’t it” feeling in the end.

Looking back, it was probably a very bad idea to create the state of Israel. And given history, Jerusalem, seems to me, to be fairly an “international” city of three religions. Saying all that, realities are what they are.

I suspect that those who really are in the know, know that Obama’s  speech on the peace process were carefully crafted and struck just the right note. They are entirely in line with European allies conclusions on the matter.

How do you feel about the situation?

♦

What’s on the stove? Liver and Onions, carrots, salad

 

 

It’s a Day in Pictures!

Tags

corporate greed, GOP, Individual Rights, Michele Bachmann, Mike Huckabee, Newt Gingrich, teabaggers, Tim Pawlenty, unions, Wisconsin

There have been some great political humor around these days. So I thought I’d share it with ya. The one to my right, is from 2008, but heck it’s current. It’s pretty much the same silliness.

Some have suggested that the GOP is in reality so pessimistic about 2012, that they are satisfied to put forth one of the laughables. And believe me there is no shortage of those.

We got your Mikey, who told us all about the President’s living in Kenya during his formative years and thus assimilating Mau Mau thinking. Not sure what Mau Mau thinking is, but it predisposes him against the British, and that somehow informs his American foreign policy decisions. It’s his “world view.”

This was before Mikey took off on Natalie Portman. ‘Course Mikey walked back the Mau Mau thing, saying he “misspoke” and meant Indonesia. Which of course is impossible to accept with anything resembling a straight face, since Indonesia is not famous for it’s Mau Mau population.

Like Tim Pawlenty and his relentless courting of the most disgusting of the homophobic right-wing religious, Mikey seems to feel it essential to play to the insane right-wing gaggle who are desperate to believe the Prez ain’t a real human American.

Then there is Newt and his claim that love of country so distorted his sense of right and wrong, that he did all manner of disgusting things, such as having affairs while pompously chastising Bill Clinton  for such things, and asking two of his ex wives for divorce when they were in the hospital following cancer surgery and just receiving news they had MS. Yes, Newt wants us to believe that his serial monogamy is no reason to deny him the high office.

And it isn’t, but for the fact that he’s a disgusting human being in, and also got into that “Obama  has a Kenyan worldview.”

But I couldn’t miss this great little cartoon:

And then we got your Michele, my belle. Well, not mine, and mostly not anybody’s but she lives in the delusion that “they really love me. And Michele is making her way toward that announcement that she is running for President.

Those on the far left, just shudder with pure joy. Michele, has had another of her famous faux pas. While speaking to some kids in New Hampshire, she told them how proud they must be, because they were the state in which “the shot heard round the world” was heard. Home she said to Lexington and Concord.

The crazy lady, who talks about the Founding Fathers all the time, just “made a slip of the tongue” so she says. Either forgetting where she was, or inexplicably telling New Hampshirites that they should be proud of Massachusetts. If that makes any sense.

Anyway, that brought forth this lovely cartoon:

Yes, truer words were never spoken.

♦

We understand that more than 100,000 showed up at the rally in Madison on Saturday. Recall efforts are underway as well against all those who voted to deny working people their right to bargain for their own livelihood.

Such efforts are underway all across the nation as we are seeing in all clarity that this is a massive effort made by the GOP to attempt the destruction of its opposition, and being willing to destroy most of the American public as well in the process.

It’s hard to know what to do, other than to fight these battles in our own states. In Iowa, it’s all a waste of time, since the Senate is controlled by the Democrats and all such legislation is simply dumped. However, Madison is leading the way in showing us how we all can help.

Walker’s backers in his bid for Governor have been collected, and we can all start boycotting these businesses. Firefighters in Wisconsin have begun withdrawing funds and closing their accounts at a Madison bank complicit in backing Walker for instance.

The rest of us can help out too. So far, I’ve seen listed the following companies:

1. Wal-Mart
2. Johnsonville Brats
3. Sargento Cheese
4. Johnson and Johnson
5. AT &T
6. John Deere
7. Koch Industries

Perhaps our good friend OKJimm can supply us with others. We need to not only forgo the use of these companies products and services, but we should each write to them and tell them that we are, and why.

What the GOP is attempting here is nothing less than a full-scale assault on working men and women and an attempt to return to the times when wages were hideously low, working conditions dangerous,  hours long, and benefits non-existent. We all have to step up. All hail the Corporate Master.

♦

PoliticusUSA has a list of proposed GOP legislation, Federal and State that is designed to destroy much of what we hold dear in this country. It is an onslaught of fear-mongering hate inspired laws that would return us to the Middle Ages. Most of it is offered in the hopes of gratifying the extreme right, while of course, the rest is designed to honor the orders of their Corporate Masters. While Nero fiddled . . . .The extreme right will get their religiously motivated theocracy, at least in name, but in fact, will find themselves slaves of the oligarchical one percent.

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Beck Criticizes Johnny Depp: Iowa Woman Declares War

Tags

Egypt, Glenn Beck, GOP, Johnny Depp, Muslim Brotherhood, teabaggers, Tim Pawlenty

It’s best not to get between a woman and her fantasy. If ya know what I mean.

Glenn Beck, perennial wackadoodle has gone and done it.

Glenn has been so god-awful crazy in the last few days with his Caliphate this and that, that, well, I thought to stop in for a small dose. Just to remind myself of just how SANE I am in comparison.

Well, he was frothing at the mouth, as you might expect–about the usual crap. And then he just up and says,

“We don’t need any Johnnnnny Depp telling us how we have to be here in America.” He babbled on about other “Hollywood” types. It was all fairly unintelligible, but he came back to it about three times. “No Johnny Depp and his ‘we need to be more like France’ bullshit–excuse my French.”

I have no idea what Beck was alluding to, but I’m sure that it had to do with some of the anal attitudes we cling to about social issues that leave the rest of the world wondering when we will ever grow up.

In any event, game on Beck. The only thing awaiting you is a full chapter in the next textbook on abnormal psychology, “disordered personalities.”

Enuf time wasted on the mentally unstable.

***

Well, Egypt finally did it. Got rid of Mubarak. I sure wish them well. I hope they get free elections and can institute the form of government that they wish.

***

Is anyone as nauseated with Tim Pawlenty as I am? He went from being a sort of nobody, to trying to be somebody by playing to the far right. He’s been palin’ around with Bryan Fischer, awful human being, and now he’s trying to “talk foreign policy” as if he knows anything about that!It seems his theory is much like Dubya’s, “might makes right.” How utterly Neanderthal. Another entry from MinneSOTA best left unheard.

***

Course, if you watch Foxy crap which I know you don’t or Glenn Beck (more than five minutes will cause ear cancer), you are probably really unaware of what the Muslim Brotherhood is all about. There is a lengthy, but very informative article at AlterNet that can set you straight.

***

Okay, it’s Saturday, the sun is not shining, but it’s 34° and so the snow, she’s a meltin’. What to do tomorrow with no football? Still a month from March  Madness. Watched “Despicable Me” last night. Was cute.

See ya.

What a Difference a Day, errr, Month? Makes?

Tags

AFA, astrology, Bryan Fischer, DADT, dinosaurs, evolution, gay rights, Glenn Beck, GOP, homophobia, Huckabee, Media, Obama, Palin, polling, right wing extremists, Romney, science, Tim Pawlenty, voters

Well, slap me with a wet noodle. You remember me? Mad woman. Not literally mad, as in certifiable, but angry mad, ready to dump a sitting president and turn the page? Yes, you do remember.

Well, it’s hard to admit that at 60 years old, I’m still an idiot a lot of the time. Moreover, I spent some under grad years studying the fine art of politics as well as living through lots of political times. You’d think I would know better.

It appears that the brilliance of Barack Obama once more is most apparent to most of the people. This has not happened over night, and certainly isn’t a result only of the speech of a life-time in Tucson. The polls were edging upward before then.

But, things have changed, and one can but cast a bemused look upon Republicans who are looking at empty hands and wondering, “has it indeed slipped from our grasp once again?” Riding high in November, the GOP is beginning to mutter. To be sure, nothing is set in concrete yet, and given the fickleness of the public, it would be unwise to assume that “it’s in the bag” for 2012. Not at all.

Still, one has to be amazed at the resilience of the President. Today, he beats Romney and Huckabee in mock match-ups and slaughters the grifter, Palin. The big switch is the Independents who have moved to the Obama column. This poll straddled the Tucson tragedy, and has some impact but doesn’t include the speech given by Obama. There is only a 6 point differential between those who think we are on the right track-wrong track, down from a 24 point differential a couple of months ago. Obama’s approval rating has moved up to 53%.

We shall see what the future holds. But clearly most of us who were ready to move on were simply wrong. Obama has played his poor hand extremely well, and has accomplished much in the lame duck session.

The GOP will have a tough time selling a “NO” or repeal everything scenario I suspect with voters. The polls, dang ’em, just keep getting in the way of the agenda.

***

Speaking of agenda, the Extremist Right didn’t take civility on as a mantra for long. Once they realized that nobody except them viewed the President’s speech as a chastisement of the Left, they went back to their usual ranting. One, I”m told, said, “but the President must have been pointing to the Left, there is nobody on the Right who needs such a chastisement!”  Delusion lives on it seems in the rock heads of the Extremist Right.

***

Proof that nothing changes, Tim Pawlenty, who on Jon Stewart, the other night, refused to agree that there is something new in the vilification of Obama that has not been present in American politics before. Stewart suggested that painting the President as  Hitler, as a Socialist, as not an American, and as not a Christian didn’t reflect true beliefs but were being used as political ploys by certain GOP members and sympathizers. Pawlenty continually feigned ignorance of Stewart’s true meaning and kept pointing out that there was vitriol on both sides.

Now Pawlenty has appeared with Bryan Fischer, of American Family Association fame, and claimed that he would re-institute DADT if president. It’s not so much that he said this, bad and deluded as that is, but that he appeared with hate-monger Fischer at all. Fischer is a virulent homophobe, one who decries giving the Medal of Honor to a “defensive” action instead of a killing hero. As to DADT, Fischer has vowed to over turn it and has claimed that McCain would lead their forces. McCain has repudiated any such notion.

Pawlenty, who for a moment, suggested he would not have acted as Palin, seems unwilling to stand up for any real principles, but again, simply plays to the lowest common denominator of the Republican base. His chances of being the nominee are nil.

***

Efforts are underway to induce Fox Noise to fire Glenn Beck. Jewish Funds for Justice submitted a 10,000 name petition to the News Corp, calling on them to end their association with the hate-mongering extremist. I admit that we try to watch Beck from time to time, just to see, but frankly, after ten minutes, it’s so awful you just can’t. He parades a slew of pseudo-scientists, historians, economists, etc., to “prove” his wacky mean and dangerous conclusions, all to a live audience of nodding automatons. It’s surreal.

The petition included some of the more egregious accusations of Beck, which makes references to Hitler some 400 times in eighteen months. His comments are widely regarded as anti-semitic and a distorter of the Gospel. For instance he claims that social justice issues are a perversion of the Gospel message of Jesus Christ.

***

Don’t know if you heard this, but the darn earth moves. Okay, so you probably knew that. But it moves in relations to the stars, and THAT is a damnable thing. If you are into astrology. Which I’m not, but still. I’m an Aries, and so is the Contrarian. At least we were. I don’t know what he is, being an April 8. But me? I’m a April 15, and that now makes me a Taurus. I don’t like it. I am trying to figure out who to complain to. Is nothing sacred?

***
Warning: the following may be hazardous to the mental health of closed minds. Others read on. A new dinosaur has been found! A small guy, but pretty darn mean. Read all about Dawn Runner, who hails from Argentina, at PBS’s Rundown Blog. He’s most primitive.

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