The Escalation of Expectation

Tags

anniversary, Humor, life in the meadow, The Contrarian

 

 

The pleasurable prediction of future events is like a narcotic to some. Always it requires ever increasing doses to achieve the desired result. Today was Sherry’s and my anniversary. Last year we both forgot about it until over a week later. This year being our tenth, I didn’t want that to happen again. Now I’ve mentioned before that Sherry is a wonderful cook, still she will use any excuse (Valentines day, her Birthday or our anniversary) to get out of putting heat to ingredients and making a meal. Anyway last night I say: “Babe, how about I drive the three-miles to the local chicken shack and pick up a bucket of wings tomorrow, so you don’t have to cook on our big day?” I didn’t get the fluttering eyelids and the loving sigh I thought was coming my way. No I get the frowny face, with just the hint of a lower lip sticking out. I quickly crank up the offer; “How about I put my best bibs on and we go to a fancy-eating pizza joint?” Now I’m not talking about a toaster oven pizza slid across some beer damp bar. I’m thinking of one of the major chains that advertise on television. Still no flutter of eyelid, and the sigh sounded more like a snort of disgust. I’m standing at the plate with two strikes. I know I have to at least hit the ball on the next pitch, fair or foul, or this game is over. “Okay! Okay! How about best bibs, a shirt with a collar, and we go to some place that has cutlery?” She makes the added condition that the silverware not be plastic, and then agrees. I feel somewhat stuck, but if my lady wants high class she gets high class. Sherry says she is in the mood for Chinese and she will find us a place to dine in the morning.

Today as I was about to get dressed for our big date, Sherry says; “Aren’t you going to shave?” Give an inch and they take a mile. I have a pretty good memory, and I’m reasonably sure I had shaved within the last week, certainly the last ten days. By any standards I am a great husband. Two, sometimes three time a year I gather wild flowers from our meadow and bring them to Sherry. I always lift my feet while she is vacuuming the carpet. Sherry never has to tell me more than three or four time to take the trash out. When I do I’m only quietly sullen, never loud. Still I am being punished on our anniversary. Of course I shaved without complaint. We had a great meal and a nice time together. Yet I am wondering what will be my lot ten years from today? Will I have to make reservations at some joint where I have to tip the violin player? Will she expect a second honeymoon?

 

A short note about my own expectations

I am fortunate and am entitled to Veteran’s health care. The VA has been rated as the most effective by several different organizations. Even so they are going to have to amp up their mental health care if somebody does not resolve the health care problem of this country, because I am going to go seriously crazy. I’m already starting to talk to the TV set; that can’t be a good thing. Every day I hear GOP pundits go unchallenged when they state, “We have the best health care in the world.” What a load of bull. We spend twice what any other nation does, we rank 27^th or something in longevity, worse in infant mortality, etc etc. Sure if you are rich or have an interesting enough disorder you will get top notch health care, but that doesn’t make “Ours the best in the world.” The British make the Rolls-Royce automobile, but I would hardly call their auto industry the best in the world. Most of the cars made there are crap, They even put the steering wheel on the wrong side for Christ sake.

I know the newscasters who come into our homes via the tube like to think of themselves as journalists. They even bemoan that journalism is such a lowly rated occupation. Just dividing up the time equally between the opposing factions is not journalism; that is reporting. A reporter can tell us about a bank robbery or a storm and that is fine. A journalist should pursue the facts to the story’s end. I recently heard a caller to C-Span sum this up better than I can. She said; “I’m sick of you just dividing the time between the Democrats and the Republicans with no comment. The Dems tell us the sky is blue, the Republicans tell us the sky is red. Its night for God’s sake and when will you people point it out to both of them that the sky is black?”

IN MY DEFENSE:

As you have become accustomed to, the Contrarian exaggerates to a slight degree. I cook usually six days a week, and frankly, I cook from scratch. I don’t do boxes of stuff and I don’t do frozen entrees. I cook, slaving over a stove with whisk and micro plane, garlic and herb, deglazing and oven roasting, carefully creating dish after dish to succulent perfection.

You’d think, therefore, on one’s anniversary, one might get a bit more than the back end of the Troy Store for a “romantic” dinner, the first offer. The second was a slide by the pizza parlor in Center Point.

As to the shaving, oh don’t get me started. This “goatee” crap was a gift for my birthday, unsolicited by me, and he hasn’t stopped whining since. Shaving every two weeks is his idea of keeping up. And worse, he mewed the entire afternoon about “beard hairs” scratching his tummy and neck. Since when do you get loose hair from shaving with cream?

At least he insisted that I sit in the car while he got out to lock the wheels into 4-wheel drive for the trip down the lane. That was gentlemanly of him!

Sherry, the much maligned perfect wife.

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Short Takes on the Day, 09/03/09

Tags

anniversary, astronomy, Chevron, Crafts, education, EFM, energy, exobiology, GOP, Humor, knitting, Levi Johnston, Obama, oil companies, right wing, Sarah Palin

Well, I’m about churched out, at least yakking about it for a while. I know my readership is kind of split between those that like religion posts and those that would rather not, but I’m back on more secular ground today, and we are going to hop around and see what’s afoot.

***

First on the agenda is that the Contrarian and I are celebrating ten years of wedded bliss today. That means dinner out which is about all we do. We could say we celebrate every day, but seriously we don’t lack from spending time together so it’s not that big a deal to either of us. We got a lovely card from CEC. It was lovely to be remembered.

Last night I had my first EFM class, and I came home with HOMEWORK!. Not that I didn’t expect it. I’m eagerly looking forward to this wonderful opportunity to explore the bible in even greater depth than I have so far.

Now, on to the goodies!

***

I’d describe myself as a novice but competent knitter. I have made two sweaters, both of which I still wear. I have yarn and a beginning for another, as well as a couple of other projects, and I’m getting that knitting urge once again, so I expect to start soon.

Vicki, over at knittingdragonflies, has turned me on to a totally new concept to me, the top down method. Most sweaters, as I’ve seen are started from the bottom and knitted in sections that you then piece together. This method obviously starts from the top, and I think is done in one piece. I’m interested and intrigued. If you are slip over and get your instructions. Happy crafting!

I admit, it’s been a long time since I posted a craft link! Hopefully I’ll find a tasty recipe or two as well. But you know me, I can never pass up the chance to slander a Rethug along the way, and the choices are sooooooo many!

***

As many of you already know, my point in these Short Takes is to make you the darling of the cocktail and dinner party, and the go to person at the water cooler. My goal is to give you that eclectic education that makes you look smart and so with it among your peers, and indeed makes you stand above to be admired and fawned over as the person who just knows everything.

So you probably need to know that the Kepler, as in Johannes Mission is a creation of NASA designed to find habitable worlds around distant stars. Word is that they are finding it might be possible to locate exomoons around some of those planets. So we have a double chance of finding habitable orbs in the sky. The technology hopes to allow the scientific ones the ability to detect the imperceptible wobble that occurs when a planet is pulled by both its sun and its moon.

All this is of course important because the need to transport to another world becomes increasingly attractive as the GOP continues to ramp up the craziness that has attacked them for the past twenty years or so. Sane humans may have no choice but to leave to preserve said sanity as it were. The only small problems left to address will be things like faster than light travel, and incidentals like how to create food replicators ala Star Trek. We are clear that we can’t live any kind of civilized life without them!

***

More wingbat shittery from the Rethugs and their spokesmorons. It seems that President Obama has done a piece that school districts can optionally play to their kids when they return to school. It’s all about working hard and being good students and learning some stuff. Pretty much what you would want you kids to know huh?

Not so, the right wing nut cases. No, this is “indoctrination” and right out of Maoist dogma. All the usual players are weighing in and that means you know its bunk. But no doubt they will convince their duped minions to raise the usual hue and cry.

Increasingly mainstream America looks with tired disbelief at the robotic lock-step ranting of the mostly evangelical ultra right.

But it does point up something. With only the promise and the verbal ranting on abortion and gay rights, you can convince the religious right to ignore its own self interest and vote for those who economically and politically destroy them. And better yet, the actual politicians can continue their own personal lascivious living. Getting caught means only having to say you are sorry and the devil made you do it.

***

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

This pretty much sums up my knowledge of how cars work. From toasters to nuclear power plants, if it needs electricity or runs on a motor, I prefer to think of it as magic. I work under the theory that there is only so much room in my noggin, and I don’t clutter up the space with stuff I don’t need to know. Plug it in, turn the key, work.

***

It is undoubtedly true that the way to potty train a dog is to keep it kenneled and take it out at regular intervals. The animal will not “foul” its sleeping quarters.

One might assume that oil companies, specifically Chevron,  operate on the same principle. If Ecuador is any evidence, they have fouled that country mightily with their obscene practices.

After doing their best to cast dirt on the litigants and the judge, they are prepared to accept that they are going to be held liable to the tune of 27 billion.  The people there are suffering from increases in cancer, miscarriages, birth defects and other problems.

This is of course the ugly American syndrome for which we are so famous. We screw other people in other countries for our personal benefit. Chevron, I suspect would not even have qualms about doing the same in the good ole US of A. Good reason to keep them out of the drilling business in Alaska and off shore.

***

Okay, don’t get me wrong, I’m no fan of Levi Johnston. He strikes me as a fairly vacuous human being, who hasn’t given much thought to much beyond his own nose yet in his short life.

But, given that he was the almost son-in-law of our dear Sarah (The Quitter) Palin, he remains in the news.

With competing desires to sell books and make some money, they undoubtedly will both view this feud as helpful to their respective endeavors. If they should join forces, they would only need another 3/4 of a brain to be an intact human being.

Still, if you have the desire to read about Mr. Johnston’s take on Mrs. Palin, no better place can be found than Vanity Fair, the best of the scrumptious interview mags. (I still have my copy of the one they did on Johnny Depp a month or so ago, and I’m not letting go of it anytime soon.)

No doubt half of what Levi has to say is pure bunk, but then that means half is scintillating gossipy goodies. You can pick and choose which you want to believe of course.

Which all goes to show ya that the human species is a hardy bunch. As the evidence builds that a huge portion of the US public is stone cold crazy as loonies, these two prove that life does indeed go on in the human zoo.

Until next time!