Well here we are again. I’m inclined to talk (ask my husband), so there is little point in trying to silence me. You have no doubt made your decision already about me.
I’m not one of those persons who people are casual about. You either like me or you hate me, seldom anything down the middle.
So I don’t give a rip’s roaring ass which one you adhere to frankly. I can come down on that both sides of that issue too, depending, so welcome if you are reading, screw you in absentia if you aren’t.
I don’t figure myself to be that much different than the rest of ya, a bit smarter than the average, a tad wiser given my age than a thirty-year-old. I know myself better than most people bother to inspect their innards, and I’m comfortable with what I find. Not always happy with it, mind you, but comfortable.
I grew up privileged. Not in super rich mind you, but privileged nonetheless. Most average kids from working class families don’t believe that, but it’s true. It was a hell of a lot easier than growing up African-American or Hispanic. It would have been better to be male given the times. But I never went to bed hungry or didn’t have a pair of shoes. I had the opportunity of a pretty decent education back when it was still affordable for the working class kid.
It’s a small but constant wonder to me that I ended up being a bleeding-heart liberal. I shouldn’t have, at least as I measure it from examining the lives of those I went to high school with. Some of them are loons. Some of them are just immersed in their own lives of grandkids and whatever one is interested in if it ain’t the state of the world and all who inhabit it. A few are liberal, a few pointedly conservative, but I repeat myself–the loons.
But I pride myself most about being a rational thinking individual who manages to blend a sophisticated metaphysical belief system along with a logic based political view of the world at the same time. They conflict, my angelic side and my devil as you would expect, and when the conflict comes, I wrestle with it, I seek to escape from it, but I rarely can ignore it.
Back in 2008, I supported Hillary Clinton, until it was obvious she was losing to Obama. Then I switched allegiance, since John McCain and his Alaskan albatross proved to be unacceptable as leaders of the free world.
So we are now 2015, and Hillary is running again. And I am supporting her again. And. . . .
I’m conflicted.
Bernie Sanders and I disagree on very little. I was frankly surprised that he gathered so much money so quickly.
I am sensitive to the notion that if all of us smart people read the tea leaves accurately and accord him no real chance, we in fact insure he will have no real chance. Yet Hillary is more than competent and it’s so time for a woman to take the leadership.
Yet Hillary and I don’t agree on a number of things, and I am more than aware that she is more conservative (by nature) and certainly by design than I am. She is more comfortable with Wall Street than I would prefer. She is more hawkish that I would prefer.
In some ways Bernie has made this easier. At least his has the good sense to run under the Democratic banner, which means he is no threat to siphon off votes in the election as a third party candidate.
So I’ve been quiet about Hillary for the most part, hoping to let Bernie’s run peter out as it is expected to, and let the conflict within my head die a quiet death. And yet, I’m mindful that if he has no chance, it can surely be in part because people like me, his natural allies, won’t switch.
I am more than aware of my conflict of interests, which devolve down to a moral choice or a loyalty choice. Both are important I suppose, but one is compelling.
I am, as I say, pretty much clear on what motivates me.
An example.
The other evening, my husband admitted, “I have no opinion on the President’s trade agreement. I simply haven’t read hardly anything about it, so I don’t know who has the better argument.”
“Same here,” I replied, “but my reasons are quite different. I have deliberately avoided reading about it. I know at the end, I’ll either have to diss Elizabeth Warren or the President, and he needs all the support he can get against the crazies, so I’ve avoided the cognitive dissonance becoming informed would cause.”
See? I can and do act to avoid issues I don’t want to deal with.
And as I scrolled through my Facebook feed, I basically stayed fairly quiet when the discussions turned to Hillary or Bernie.
Yet the nagging continued.
This is not a time to merely support the candidate who can win. At least not until we get to the crossroads. Until the primaries are completed and one has withdrawn, I figure I am required by my moral compass at least to support the candidate whose dedicated to doing the most for the average person.
So I find myself feeling all sorts of traitor in leaving Hillary’s side and offering my small donation to Bernie. I still figure he doesn’t have a chance, but if that happens, at least I can sleep well knowing I did the right thing. I followed my conscious and not my cynical political savvy self.
Nothing will change in this country before it is too late to matter unless we as citizens, victims of the government machine, stand up and stop this madness. I’ve truly had enough of those who promise a better future while continuing to “play the game”. The game at this point is simply rigged, and so clogged with illegality and personal greed as to make even Satan blanche at the sheer chutzpah.
Perhaps it’s always been this way, with a small but vocal group warning of “the end” but with climate change and income inequality, I don’t see planet earth surviving much longer with humanoids being at the top of the ladder. Unless that is, we make drastic changes.
They say that the uber wealthy in the world now routinely have bunkers build beneath their luxury homes, guarding against what they know must surely come, the uprising of people who have nothing left to lose.
I fully expect Hillary Clinton will be the next president. I hope however that she is not. Not because she wouldn’t be okay as president’s go. But because following Bernie, would be a fine time for Elizabeth Warren. And at least with Bernie, we have an honest chance to turn the page to a new way of doing democracy.
But enough of fantasy politics.
Back to reality.
Where’s my checkbook?
Existential Ennui 
I have no problem supporting Bernie Sanders over Hillary during the primaries. Unless he can pull back the fixed gaze most people have on Hillary he will likely not be the nominee. Of course I will find myself voting for Hillary in the general election by simply realizing that the GOP has nothing new to offer.
But by going all out for Bernie now, if he doesn’t actually win the nomination, he will force Hillary to address the issues that appeal to the Democratic base more than she would if someone like Sanders was not in the race. It may also fall over into the GOP camp too because what Bernie is talking about is the income inequality in this country and the the way neoliberals like Hillary and the entire GOP are mostly, if not entirely, lap dogs for the moneyed interests. Many on the right are beginning to get uncomfortable with this.
I think you make the best point–forcing (hopefully) a deeper discussion into what is really wrong with this country–the obscenity of income inequality and how it is at the root of our troubles. If you read Piketty and others, income inequality is driving us off a cliff. Hopefully we will see the light and people like Sanders and Warren lead the way in helping us to understand it all. I think that is his most enduring offering to the election season. !END
You express the conundrum of many.
I suspect I do. I think the far left is more than capable of seeing the handwriting, as it were, but there are camps of people with “high morals” and those with “low morals”….lol…I count myself in the latter but with enough shame to at least try for the best solution. My husband informs me it is called the Mississippi oath–the promise, in the end, to support the candidate of my party….lol..!END
This is why I love the name of your blog!
hehe, I rather do as well….most of life ends up being a cross between fuck it, and well, don’t…hahaha…just depends on how one feels at any given moment. !END
Let’s put it this way: you’re more fun than Sartre.
oh now I must save that as an endorsement…”more fun than Sartre…*looking up Sartre’s sense of humor. or humour as the Brits say…* Thank you profoundly from the tip of my pointy-blame inflicting fingers! haha…!END
I agree with you completely. Every word you say rings true.
And then I remember back when Obama first started running against Hillary and everybody said he didn’t have a snowball’s chance.
yes, he wasn’t thought to stand a chance against her and that is something to hold on to. Unfortunately Obama was never the liberal Bernie is so I’m not sure I can trust the analogy too far. But surely I would like to. !END
True, he wasn’t that openly liberal, but he was, um, he wasn’t your “normal” contender (pst! He was black!) . But even a young(ish) non-white man was considered a better choice than a “girl” for the office. And Bernie hits 3 out of four stars: he’s old, white, and male. Yes, he’s very liberal in views, but his voting record shows that he can vote with the conservatives, and that might save him.
I rather suspect that Bernie’s voting can be attributed to certain principles that he stands by no matter what. I’m not always fond of that, but then again, consistency in one’s political thought has merit. I strain to find consistency between reality and faith and that sometimes gets rather tough, so I can even admire that in old Bernie. lol !END
I would love to see a woman become President. I just can’t stomach Hillary. Couldn’t vote for her in 2008, can’t do it now. Of course if that “fixed gaze” (so well put by lbw) does hand her the crown she supposedly deserves, I’ll have to hold my nose and force myself to vote for her. What’s the alternative? Bernie would certainly be my dream candidate.
a lot of people agree with you Gunta, and frankly it isn’t so hard for me to get there either. I have grave doubts about her liberalness, and I do think she is part of the dynastic thinking, but I’m still prepared to say she’s better than anything the GOP has offered up or will offer up. But yes, Bernie would be the dream, and I have to support it for as long as it lasts. !END
I am pretty much in the same camp here. Try as I might, I just can’t get excited about Hillary. I think a lot of people feel that way and it’s disturbing, because people who aren’t excited don’t turn out to vote. As for Bernie Sanders, much as I agree with his positions, I am not excited about him either. One of my big concerns is his age, and I know that’s not supposed to matter but it does. (Hillary’s getting up there too, which concerns me, but not as much, since women tend to live longer). I’m 62. I retired at 56 and can’t even imagine doing that job anymore let alone be President of the United States. Of course, I know people who have more energy (both mental and physical) than I do who are my age or older (you for one!). But Bernie would be 74 by the time he would be elected. That’s another 12 years on where I am now. I just can’t imagine being under that kind of stress at that age. But maybe it’s just me. If he does become a real contender, we will need to pay close attention to who he picks as a VP candidate.
You raise a good point Mimi, one I have not spent much time thinking about. I’d prefer a younger candidate for sure, but we end up working with what we have. I have the same fear you do, that Hillary is not engendering the excitement we need. Perhaps that will be different when people have their “first chance to vote for a woman for president”. I certainly hope so, if Bernie is unsuccessful. !END