26 | March | 2013 | Existential Ennui

Tags

abortion rights, gay rights, Insane Republicans, Women's issues

Dino named Secretary of Education.

This is one state to steer way way clear of. If you even see the letters, DAK, start backing away.

The folks there have returned to living in caves. The signs say brake for Brontosaurus.

Seriously.

In what can only be the happiest marriage between fundamentalism and unscience, the legislature (really four old white dudes sitting around a campfire), have determined that women shall bear all children put upon them by any many who gets a hankering to “get a little.” And the governor, one Dalrymple, really the owner of the local stone quarry, has signed the dang thing into law, or laws as the case may be, because there are several.

Now of course there will be lawsuits since this is just about the opposite of the law of the land. And the good Dalrymple has decided in his rubbing of two brain cells together, that the fair cave citizens of said cave state should pay for that. After all, it’s for their own good.

They have managed to reduce the clinics in the realm to one, and they are determined to put that one out of business by loading it down with so many odious regulations that nobody but God himself could comply.

Now these cave men purport to be Republicans, who last time I checked, were for small government and getting off the backs of business operators. Except of course when they aren’t for that because they are more interested in controlling the lives of women in their cave realm.

Wouldn’t it just be easier to conk them over the head like usual?

As I said, avoid at all costs. Ken Ham is said to be scoping out the area for another of his fun times with science “museums”.

HINT: you know guys, one day women will get a majority in these legislative bodies. You might think about that before you keep screwing with us.

California, by and large, is a crazy state, but at least half the time, it’s good crazy. That’s a pretty good track record if you throw totally insane places like Alabama into the mix.

Yet, following the Peyton rule that each state is required by law to maintain at least two certifiable simpletons in its band of state or federal legislative arenas, California no doubt counts Rep. Jack Kimble as one of their (hide him in the closet when company comes) boneheads.

Seems that Mr. Kimble is pretty worried about what might happen should the SCOTUS decided that California must allow marriage between people who love each other, without checking under skirts and peeking inside trousers to determine the gender of said love birds.

Kimble in a last gasp of intellectual showmanship, tweeted this:

Jack? Are you worried, or just a wee bit excited by that prospect?

Fearful that the gay will be just popping up everywhere, Tony Perkins, that nice hateful man who runs the Family Research Council and knows God better than most people know their own toes, suggests that if the SCOTUS makes that fateful decision legalizing all that “nasty stuff”, why people might just rise up and start a revolution.

Yeah, I figure that people are aching to destroy their families, neighborhood, businesses, and such just to make sure that some stranger is not doing the nasty with someone who shares plumbing equipment with them.

But no doubt, it will be a good enough excuse for the survivalists to go out and purchase another half-dozen big guns.

La PeePee Lapierre certainly hopes so anyway.

There is a group called Concerned Women for America. As best as I can tell, they are women who are concerned about a certain kind of America, one that they control and which they feel comfortable in. They are really mad at Starbucks.

Starbucks, as you may already know, is in favor of marriage equality. So it stands to reason that somebody would make the leaping logical conclusion, that that means that Starbucks will probably soon start discriminating against straight people. Or at least discriminate against straight people who want to (just cuz) discriminate against gay people. I mean, old habits are hard to break.

Oh I do love a dose of stupid with my coffee.

We understand that Wisconsin Governor, Scott Walker is writing a book.

I know.

You can’t wait to go stand in line to get it autographed can you?

Reports are that it will be written in crayon and Walker promised it would be in his own words, at least the ones he can spell.

Everyone is delighted that there will be plenty of pictures to color throughout.

There is still a debate as to what category it will fall under for you librarians wanting to dust off a special shelf. Suggestions range from Sci-fi fantasy to Abnormal psychology.

I am putting in my Amazon pre-order.

Yeah, I believe in unicorns too.