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apple-pie-ck-709820-lYou’re the apple of my eye. Both of them. Truly. I really mean it. Honestly. No foolin’.

Okay, so  I made an apple pie today. A nice fat ol’ big one. Deeeeeep dish.

And we are having a good old-fashioned pot roast. With gravy, and mashed taters and nicely caramelized onions and carrots. And some copycat Red Lobster cheddar biscuits.

Why am I such a good wife?

I ask myself the same question.

I guess I was just born that way.

I’m getting a cramp in my shoulder. Trying to pat yourself on the back has its draw-backs.

Hey, I’m just happy today. I’m happy most days.

I got a good man, a good dog, and I love my house, my city, and my state. I love my brain and I love you guys, and I love God. And that was in no particular order–you know that Lord!

But I am still a snarky woman who is old enough to not give a good poo what you think about anything I say or think, so let’s see what we can find in the wacky world of cartoon politics.

2013-CongressPlenty of folks in the know, or in the think at least, figure that things aren’t going to improve much this year over the last four.

As to the Congress that is. It’s still (thanks to gerrymandering) entirely too full of yesterday’s child, the ubiquitous Tea People who are like wack-a-moles, popping up again and again.

We’ve said so much about their lack of knowledge about anything beyond which is the finest beer–Bud or Coors (yes even Sam Adams is way beyond these folks) or what is the best NASCAR track Daytona or Talladega, that little more can be said.

Boehner will continue to look mildly embarrassed as they continue to search uteruses, strut their 2nd Amendment bona fides, and vote for the umpteenth time to outlaw Obamacare. And Harry Reid will continue to sigh as McConnell filibusters each and every bill, because Reid can’t make himself alter the damn rules to return the Senate once again to a majority vote forum.

Business as usual–meaning no business at all.

2012-Warmest-YearMeanwhile, we all saw the reports that this past year was the warmest EVER.

That means EVER.

While the Right continues to worry us about the legacy of debt we are leaving to our next generation (a legacy not nearly as dire according to REAL economists), they of course deny that climate change is real, that we have anything to do with it, and that we should STOP F**king around and get busy.

The Left, full of bombast, tells us  that of course it’s real and of course the evidence of the VAST majority of scientists suggests we have a lot to do with it, which is GOOD news, since that means we might be able to undo the damage.

But where is the legislation? Where is the serious discussion where were are confronted with the alternatives and what we need to do NOW?

Oh, yeah, we are expecting answers from the 113th.

I wonder if hibernating might be a good idea. Course, if I was a polar bear in my snow cave, I might just find the thing melt out from over me.

HagelYa see, Hagel is like mainstream. He’s supported by all kinds of retired generals, and previous Secretaries of Defense. And he is NOT the policy maker in the first, second or third place.

And the neo-cons hate him because he turned on their pet rock the Iraq war really quickly. And so they hate him, because he exposed how wrong they were with their all “they will greet us as liberators” and crap.

And the usual cast of tantrum havers will have at it–tantrums that is. They will threaten and whine, and in the end Hagel will be confirmed. And then they will do the exact same thing to Brennan and Lew.

And that is how you pretend to do something, when in fact you are doing nothing at all, because you can’t get past the Tea People, who have almost no support nationwide, but locally they still  can win an election, because guess what, just like rich people tend to live with rich people? Well Tea People tend to find trailer parks the garden of Eden. Go figure.

DO NOTHING CONGRESSThe GOP doesn’t hate women.

It just doesn’t see them as a significant reason to do something to protect them against men who get out of hand with their hands.

You know how America just can’t bring itself to agree that if service men and women are in another country and commit a crime, they should be tried by the jurisdiction they are in?

Well, Republicans don’t think that Native tribal authorities should be able to arrest NON-NATIVE perpetrators who have assaulted Native Women. Kind like the same thing.

And don’t get me started on how they don’t want to even touch assaults in same-sex cases.

But the GOP is not anti-women or anything. Frankly they don’t think about women much at all. Except when they want to have sex, or dinner, or needmixing-it-up a clean shirt, or need another beer from the fridge which is way the hell on the other side of the house and all. Then they think of women.

Have you noticed?

Ummm, yeah, they are all white men.

Now I’m not totally against white men. I am married to one. He’s a good one.

But doncha think that appearances matter there Mr. President?

I mean step out on a limb and get yourself a woman or two, a Hispanic? A BLACK? Whoa, are we getting out there or something?

I know you will say you looked for the MOST qualified. Well, what does THAT say?

I mean I am with ya on most things, but Sir, please. We can handle the big jobs. I know you know that. So. . . .?

losing-itThe NRA went to the White House.

They sat down with the Vice President.

Mr. Wayne PEE PEE LaPierre didn’t attend.

He’s still recovering from the increased dosage of his anti-schizo meds.

He and Alex Jones are in the same ward.

Hey Mr. Pee Pee, if you say that we need to get guns out the hands of criminals, how exactly are we to do that when you don’t want background checks or registration or limiting the sale of certain weapons? I mean how is the gun seller supposed to know? Maybe we should brand all convicts on their forehead? You know, a criminal ain’t a criminal until they have been convicted. The horse has kinda left the barn Mr. Pee Pee.

Oh, he’s not able to receive visitors yet?

The strain of reality takes a long time to recover from.

I see.

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