How Many Feet Can You Fit in One Mouth?

Tags

Election 2012, GOP, Humor

Everybody is talking about what a week it was in South Carolina. I guess they are right.

The drop-outs, the lead changes, tax returns, open marriage, the dirty old media. Pick your poison.

I gotta admire Ricky S. He just stamps his feet, and says “what the freaky-deaky is wrong with you folks? I’m the only one who has NEVER flipped. I’ve remained the same gay hatin’, health-care hatin’ fool I’ always been. VOTE FOR ME DAMN IT.”

And Mittens is rattled, and finding new feet to stick in his mouth every day. “Dear, don’t I just have two? I spit out four last night when flossing.”

Yes, he really did say that the 99% were just envious of rich folks like him. Yes he did.

Mittens has continued to “relate to common folks”.  He’s told us:

1. that he’s unemployed too
2. that he’s worried about giving getting pink slips
3. that he’s not worried about the rich, but the “rest of us” are hurting
4. that releasing “multiple” tax returns would be a “gift” to the Democrats.

He does get it.

Can’t you see that?

Oh and he didn’t inherit a thing, he made all his money. Oh yeah, sure ya did Mittens, sure you did.

Meanwhile, the Newster has managed to turn philandering into an asset.

Millions of men relate.

Millions of women do too.

I suspect in rather different ways.

How dare the MSM report on his  adulterous goings on?

I mean have they no shame?

Late at night, Newt’s phone rings. It’s Mittens and Ricky S. They want to know in detail just exactly he pulled it off. They take notes.

It all adds up to  cheap cuts of meat.

Ricky and Dr. Paul can’t even get a cartoon unto themselves.

And polls today say that the GOP voter is more unhappy with the field of candidates than they were two month ago.

But in truth, this market never had a decent steak in it.

Ever.

It had a casserole, and a hot dog. You figure out who they were.

It had some really bad spam.

A good meatloaf would look good now.

Which all begs the question?

Does God really love Foreign usurpers of Socialist persuasion who praise Allah in secret?

Or is this dude just the luckiest dang fella you ever seen?

You gotta laugh.

You gotta giggle.

You gotta thank the Buddha, or Zeus, or your aunt Martha.

And hope that the circus keeps rolling along.

Rushy Limppaw and all the other GOP movers and shakers are grimacing and puffin’ wondering who has stolen their game?

They are tailing George Soros and all them other libtards.

No doubt they have been pullin’ some dirty tricks to make their gang of marionettes look so bad.

Muslim Brotherhood is no doubt to blame.

Or maybe it’s Putin and his commie buddies.

Or maybe it’s Michelle Obama and her sorority sisters.

Or maybe it’s those Frenchies or that woman Angela Merkle.

It could be those environmentalists and all their talk about CLEANLINESS.

And no doubt Hollywood figures prominently.

And then there are the gays and the Blacks, and the Browns, and the Jews, the Union members, the teachers, the firefighters and police. The college professors and all manner of elites.

All poised to screw over US: the rich white guys.

 And the Tea Party member just says:

WELL DON’T LOOK AT ME! 

And so it goes, as Kurt Vonnegut used to say.

So it goes.