Existential Ennui

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Existential Ennui

Daily Archives: December 17, 2011

I’m Pulling for the One Percent!

17 Saturday Dec 2011

Posted by Sherry in An Island in the Storm, Humor, Life in the Meadow

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

Humor, stupid people, Stupidity

Yes I am.

I’m a proud supporter of the 1%’ers.

Without them, we would be in caves. Or worse, nothing but food for T-rex and his gang of all mouth and no brains.

I can sleep at night, knowing they stand guard–staving off the constant slide toward extinction that is the end of most of creation.

The ONE PERCENTERS!!!

Meaning of course, those who have IQ’s above 110 or so.

They insure that the species goes forward and actually EVOLVES.

While, the 99%? Well,  let me see. About one half of those are people who when dressing for work, put on a shirt with their name on it, or worse, a description of their job (lest they forget and find themselves in accounting).  Another quarter are those allowed to dress themselves and refer to themselves as “middle management” even if that means being assistant manager at  the local Piggly Wiggly.

The other 25%? Well 24% are Republican and politicians. To be fair, the remaining 1% of the 99% are Democrats who got in the wrong line when they went in the “chose your political party” room.

Which simply all re-enforces what I have said for years, MOST PEOPLE ARE STUPID.

And Darwin was right. The fittest survive. But what he didn’t know, was just how few fit were needed to drag along the species as a whole.

Only 1%.

It’s nearing the end of the year, and so, we get to lists. Lists of the “best movies of 2011”, the “most important people of 2011″, the best-selling books of 2011”, and well, you get the idea.

So I suppose it’s only fair that we compose a list of the “10 most stupid people of 2011.”

I know, I know, how can we be limited to only ten? Why, in seconds, we can triple, quadruple or more that list.

If you think that I’m going to do all the work, well heck, no way. I ain’t stupid ya know.

I will point out a few themes that might get you started.

I just read where Michele Bachmann once said this:

[Pelosi] is committed to her global warming fanaticism to the point where she has said that she’s just trying to save the planet. We all know that someone did that over 2,000 years ago, they saved the planet — we didn’t need Nancy Pelosi to do that.

Does that help? Make your eyes dance with glee?

Remember this one: infomercials are designed  to sell products that can’t be sold to the rationally intelligent. They prey on the knuckledraggers. Witness: the “exer-stick”, a broom handle, yours for only $19.95 to “exercise” with, and a traveling model that “telescopes” for easy carrying in your luggage.

Must I go on?

The richest 1% gets most of its support from the barely literate in the 99%, all the time telling them to “pull up their bootstraps” and when they can’t find any, announcing that they were stolen by Blacks, Mexicans, Muslim fanatics, gays, atheists, liberals, or educated college professors. And this is accepted as true.

The stupid hoard gold anticipating the coming apocalypse, but where will they spend it when Jesus comes to set up the Kingdom?

Sure sign of a gay, or cheating Republican: running on a platform of “family values” which is anti-gay, anti-Muslim, and claims that the Founding Fathers never dreamed that everyone wasn’t a Christian.

Saying out loud that global warming is a hoax because it’s cold outside.

Sure sign that there must be a God: the world doesn’t implode when it contains both a Paris Hilton and a Kim Khardasian at the same time. Or substitute Jersey Shore kids, and any Housewives from anywhere.

When scientists are puzzled that Darth Cheney has not rotted from the inside out.

You can still buy wite-out, pickled pig’s feet, slinkys and candy korn.

Most people can’t find any foreign country on a map unless we invade it.

People who believe the earth is flat can’t recall ever reading about anybody falling off the edge.

Extreme sports are lauded as “inspiring”, and the predictable deaths that occur, as “shocking.”

We spend billions on “wars on things” that are never won, and we just spend more.

People pay money to listen to the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Newt Gingrich, Ann Coulter, and, well the list is inexhaustible.

Grifters can always make a living.

The folks who are the busiest at screeching about “the sanctity of life” are the ones most likely to call for war.

So get busy and offer up your lists of the 10 most stupid people of 2011, and a quote or two as “proof” would be appreciated. Not needed, of course, but amusing none-the-less.

And get out there and shop your socks off. Only 7 or so more days until all hell breaks loose.

 

 

 

 

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