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It’s starting to make sense finally.

The GOP, I mean.

See, all the rational candidates? They chose not to run. Rational being defined as those that have actual principles that they live or die by. Somebody just forgot to inform Michele and Ricky S of that. And of course Ron Paul, but he would never have listened anyway. He is so principled that he has no chance EVER.

But Mitt and Newt and Ricky P are naturals at this. Karma Karma Karma Chameleon. Just be what the folks want. The folks being the loud-mouthed knuckle-dragging wingbattery right, who can’t tell a  quark from a muon, but can pontificate upon economic trickle-downism at the drop of a hat, without knowing a tinker’s damn about  it. If you asked them who John Maynard Keynes was, they would vote that he was the side-kick of Dobie Gillis (go look it up).

But these are the drooling heads that the desperate types such as described above, find it useful to play to.

 Mittens does it like a over-sized puppy, crashing into his food bowl, sending kibbles flying, all the while grinning from ear to ear, “do ya still love me, huh? Pleeeeze!”

Ricky P, does it dutifully, all the while griping in the limo to his handlers, that “this ain’t none of the fun you guys promised.”

Newt does it with an effete effrontery, that borders on contempt for the very people he courts. “That ought to hold the little fuckers for a while.”

Yes, they are our little troop of mad-ators. The talking head that never held an opinion he wouldn’t change for a vote. Mittens are well documented at this point. The only new one is his recent pretense at shock and disdain for anything called amnesty. Why, only a mere five years ago, Mittens was talking about the necessity to find a means to citizenship for some of our undocumented. Course, now, he recoils in horror at the mere thought. But then, well, it sounded remarkably like what Newty is proposing.

And before you get all soft on the Grifter, let me remind you that Newt is not talking about citizenship as far as I can tell. He merely talks about giving them some paper that allows them to remain. I guess under Newt, we might be looking at creating a permanent class of non-citizens. Some might call that slavery of a sort. Some might. Yes they might.

While we are at it, I suppose we ought to drag out the first of a long list of flippy-flops that the Grifter has gone through. They are at least as long as those of Mittens. Like I said, this is the year of the Flippy-Flopper Candidate.

It is fairly unfair to include either Ricky P or Hermie C in this mix. Neither has had a principle on anything long enough to know what one is. Hermie is still not sure why being “against abortion in any form” is in opposite to “ultimately the mother must make that decision.” He is not sure why he should have to explain HOW he would have done things (any things) differently that President Obama, beyond saying he would gather his people together and “get all the information”. I mean what part of “in the end I will make a decision” don’t you get?

Ricky P just likes all the sparkles and jingles of the whole business. He likes shaking hands, and riding in limos and seein’ parts of the country he never saw before. He likes seein’ those pretty diamonds around the withered necks of old-haggy women who crush their big bosoms against his chest, smelling of Chanel and mothballs, with lipstick bleeding into the creases around their lips. He likes their money more. He figures about fifteen minutes on the way to the next debate is all the time necessary to memorize “his socialist policies” and “fire the FED.” 

 I see it this way:

Mittens has a pathological need to be president. This is some proof for him that he is “somebody”. It may come from daddy issues. He may suffer from what so many of the rich-by-proxy kids suffer from–lack of self-esteem. Who knows. I ain’t no head doctor. But the man’s insane need to attain the office makes his a loose cannon. I can honestly, all snark aside, tell you I have NO CLUE WHAT THIS MAN BELIEVES IN ABOUT ANYTHING.

Ricky is just a puppy dog who has been praised for being a good dog. He is faithful. He is ever-pleasing. As long as he gets his treat, he’s loyal and will do your bidding. He will chase down that pheasant, and bring it back to lay at your feet, and never puncture that  skin and take a taste. He trusts that you will reward him heavily if he is good. Ricky is owned by a string of high bidders, who have no interest but their own. They tell Ricky they are doing the public good, but Ricky is just a dumb dog, and so he believes it. He is dangerous like dumb Dubya was dangerous. They are led.

Hermie is a “self-made” man, who cringes at the thought that African-Americans have worked decades if not more than a century to give him the opportunity he now enjoys. He has no where else to look for his own self-worth, and he ain’t about to give it up to his people. He was too scared to march in the 60’s so he moved up the ladder of opportunity by being the House Negro. In his mind, he thinks he’s being slick, using whitey to achieve. His little wealth is a joke to the Kochs, who are the ones using him. He has outlasted his usefulness at this point, and will be thrown to the curb of “used up.”

Newt is an arrogant bully. He is proud of the fact that can make a buck without working. He’s a classic grifter, who now that he has the dough he wants, wants the power. He actually believes he’s smarter than anyone else. He blatantly discards women when they are no longer useful to him; meaning they not longer enhance his high-power persona. He changes positions as necessary to attract the rabble vote, all the while being utterly contemptuous of the “little and dirty” people. He is seriously dangerous, because he will do what the hell he wants to, legal or otherwise.

That’s the circus guys.

The only question: How many are gonna come and pay to see it?