Tags
Beck's Nincompoops, Butterball, Humor, Islam, Islamophobia, satire, The Blaze, turkeys
In the ongoing contest to be the craziest person/group/country, Americans continue to excel.
This week, a tiny minutia of human DNA (slightly below the Neandertal level of intellectual proclivity), rose to the occasion and outdid themselves in proving that, once again, nobody puts the US in a corner when it comes to sheer batfooking insanity.
Case in point.
Somebody, for some reason, called Butterball company and asked them whether the tasty birdies they offer to us each holiday season, were Halal certified. Like Kosher certified, Halal certification simply means that the slaughter occurred in a manner compliant with religious practices.
Butterball’s answer was that indeed all whole bird turkeys are killed in an Islamically acceptable fashion, though no prayers (a part of the actual certification) are done. Similarly, no prayers are done for Kosher certification either (a rabbi must come in to do that). Butterball claims that various ethnic distributors may complete the requirements as they wish.
It should be noted that I have also read at least that the manner of killing Kosher and Halal is exactly the same.
But of course, facts stand in the way of hysteria with our band of nuts across America. They prefer to deal in rumor, innuendo, ad hominem ethnic hatred and vile humor. No less a certifiable wingnut that Pamela Geller is all up in craziness about this. My God, Islam is literally trying to “stuff their religion down our throats.” That’s not a quote by her, but gosh it seemed too good to not use.
The Blaze nincompoops were out in force. One can almost see them flapping their arms and racing up and down sidewalks yelling for everyone to throw out their birds, throw out your birds.
Doug Corrigan
Hate is a good thing. It helps you defeat your enemies. We need more ‘hate’ in America, and we need a whole lot less Pollyannaish, Goody-Two-Shoes idiocy regarding that putrid cult of murder, invented by a ‘hate’ filled camel-wacker named moohammad — that cult would, of course, be called islam.
Yes Doug, you have more than enough for all of us. Now recite the 1st Amendment again, and explain how it doesn’t apply to anyone you hate.
Taquoshi
Unfortunately, many of our don’t have that option. However, I have every intention of putting my hands on our non-Butterball turkey and praying to Lord Jesus Christ to remove any taint of any kind of ritualic prayer to idols that may have occurred. And you can bet that I’ll be praying over our other meat from now on, too!!
Allah is not an idol Sasquatch. It’s another name for God. But do us all a favor, pray non-stop, don’t even stop long enough to eat.
GetOurCountryBack
Just one more way these b*stards are creeping into our society and trying to get their agenda forced on us. As an American I don’t give a flying flip if they can find food that is okay for them to eat. Better yet, lets put a bill out that forbids this and force them to get the he!! out.
They aren’t creeping GOCB, they are coming right down your esophagus now. As a moron, you aren’t expected to know that we can’t “put a bill out”. I thought you airheads were against regulations against business?
AB5R
For Christians it is not acceptable to eat foods offered to idols. In this case the Islamic prayer to Allah (in the bible he is known as Satan) makes halal food something that has been offered as a sacrifice to an idol, a particularly evil one in this case.
I would agree that if Satan is Allah, he would be a “particularly evil” idol. But he’s not, and you’re stupid. You are exactly the reason why internet access is NOT an acceptable therapy in the Head Hospital. Stick to legos please.
MikeM1969
I don’t eat butterball, and now I never will. One step closer to sharia compliance. I will die before I comply.
Easy to say when you don’t eat it anyway hey Mike? And as to that last part, we can but wish.
Loafer4952
Well I know I won’t be buying anymore turkeys or anything that butterball has to do with it. We usually by several turkeys thru out the year. This is America and we need to be americans. It is ok to believe in your religon but when you come to America you do as Americans do. If you don’t like the way we do something then go back where you came from I am sure they will do it your way.
That’s right, and so we will have no more of that Kosher stuff any more either right? America was not settled by Jews for goodness sakes, but good old Christian Protestants. And the damn Catholics better stop saying prayers over wine and bread too. You are onto something Loafer. Or is it just your brain that loafs?
Nobama201258
We have bigger fish to fry people,how bout those PETA nutjobs wanting us to eat tofu instead of turkey ?
Yeah, I got my shotgun at the ready Nobama. I was thinkin’ of staking out the tofu shelf at Wal-Mart and pickin’ up those stealth buyers and then follow them home and picket their houses. The UNAMERICANness of it!
Zombee
Barack Hussein Obama (aka. The Impostor) doesn’t care whether or not you know if the food you buy is Islam-approved inhumanely Halal slaughtered! But he sure cared about whether his fellow Muslims in his home state of Illinois knew it when he served in the Illinois State Senate and sponsored the ‘Halal Food Act’ in 2001.
Now how did I know that one of your creepin’ crazies would bring the President into this. And congrats Zom, you have one fine hate blog. No advertising here though, keep your hatred at home.
Tri-OX
Catering to terrorists certainly isn’t good for the Butterball brand image.
So, triple OX (you guys self-identify so exquisitely), all Muslims are terrorists? Is that your belief? Well we are in a world of trouble if that is the case. Go to jail, do not pass Go, do not collect $200. You fail basic common sense.
And so we depart. Please don’t scare the zoo animals here. They are precious to us since they remind us that we actually are superbly sane by comparison. Hope you had a great Thanksgiving and enjoyed your turkeys. We alas had duck, which was excellent, by the way. And stay away from those malls!
PS: If you see smoke on the horizon, not to worry. It’s just your local trailer park having a turkey burning bonfire. All hail to Ed and the crew at the Daisy Chain Tea Party Club Trailer Park, now at an all-time attendance level of SIX.
Related articles
- Clean Up, Meat Aisle: Talking Heads Exploding over Halal Butterballs (atlasshrugs2000.typepad.com)
- Is Your Turkey a Secret Muslim Sharia Jihadi Al Qaeda Operative????????? (passthedoucheys.com)
- Muslim turkeys are invading America, religious right warns (seriously) (americablog.com)
- The Latest Threat To America: The Sharia Turkey (outsidethebeltway.com)
- Invasion of the Butterballah (brobrubel.wordpress.com)
You’re a braver woman than I, Sherry…….I couldn’t wade into the comment cesspool, Geller’s insanity was more than enough for my weak stomach!
🙂
Good grief, people are nuts.
I Iove the re-design!
HA. I was so glad I found you on my zemanta search. Great minds and all. I know, I want to leave a comment under each, and I do leave a few here and there, about once every 2 months. But they are hopeless wrecks of people who couldn’t see the world clearly with the most powerful magnifying glass in the world. Lost souls all of them. Sick in the cabasa. Best Denise!
The inanity of it all! Oh, and before these dorks start fuming over Allah being Satan, maybe they should read the Quran, where Allah is clearly identified as the god of Abraham, Moses, and Jesus. Seriously people, eat your Thanksgiving dinner peacefully.
You can’t explain anything to them, they are certain they are right. The know nothing but the tiny little group that feeds them this insanity.\
What a bunch of crap! Bottom line is, if your Turkey has been circumcised,it’s OK to eat, and with God’s blessing..
It it insane or what? I mean they always find something new to come up with. Crazy crazy people.
Thank you, Sherry, I really needed that laugh today. What awesomely misinformed people they are.
Hope the duck was good!
Best,
Reamus
Frighteningly so sad to say, and they would tell you that it is you who is stupendously ignorant. But when you limit yourself to the Drudge and WND for your information, what can you expect.?
I’d laugh, but those morons vote. Hate and ignorance dance so well together. Sadly, those commenters will never see that what they do is so far removed from Christianity that their road back to it is impossible to attain.
Yes they are a walking ad for bringing back literacy tests aren’t they. They have no clue how hard it is to maintain the progressive position against such insanity that just begs to be silenced for it’s sheer stupidity.
personally? I won’t eat any Jello Salad that hasn’t been blessed by Father Bill over at the Church of Our Holy Mother of Occasional Help. Just doing my best to keep up with the Lutherans.
And well you should. By the by, I have a rather delicious jello salad posted at What’s on the Stove. LOL…do you cook?
Pingback: Was Your Turkey Sacrificed to the Devil? « MackQuigley
Gee, I’ve been waiting patiently for all that Thai and Chinese food I eat to turn me Buddhist.
Wingnuts, bless ’em, don’t get nearly enough e. coli in their diets…
Now that is a thought. lol…e coli should do the trick.
I’d be interested in someone fleshing out the idea that “Allah” is just a generic name for “God”. Do yourself a favor and as someone who’s more than a nominal Muslim if he believes that “Allah” and the God of the Jews is the same God. That would actually be worth videotaping.
I agree it deserves a very long post. I’m not a Muslim if you are suggesting I am one. I happen to be a Catholic, though I’m not sure it matters much. A study of the word God in the bible, turns up a very fascinating history wherein the Hebrew God was often conflated with other gods of the geographical vicinity such and was considered at one time to be the God would beat out the other gods for supremacy at the the heavenly council. No one has a corner on the term as we use it today. Those who attempt to argue that Allah is an idol are on shifting sand.
The flip-side, of course, is that it’s somewhat asinine to get one’s holiday giblets ajumble over whether or not turkeys are slaughtered in such a way that Muslims will eat them.
Next.
being a country that claims to not favor one religion over another, I would guess we ought to care that our Muslim brothers and sisters have an ability to find foods that they can consume similarly to the lengths we go to to insure the same for our Jewish friends. Butterball, no doubt is largely motivated by profits, but as any Republican would tell you, that’s a good thing. lol