It’s a well-known story among my family at least that from about the age of three I could be heard regularly to say, “the American people have the attention span of a gnat.” And that was before I was old enough to read what the attention span of a gnat was. And no, I’m not about to inform you. Do your own damn homework.
Okay, so that’s not exactly true, well not even a little bit. But it pays to exercise the incredulity muscles early and often if we are going to be forced to comment on a political world dominated by horses-asses and other donkeyish slugs parading around the good old US of A claiming to be legitimate candidates for the highest office in the land. I mean frankly being president any more seems to be largely reserved for the more outrageous members of the body politic.
A couple of weeks ago, nobody could quit talking about Michele “am I going the way of the Palinator?” Bachmann. She was the rising TeaNutz® star. Was she a submissive wife who would clear every presidential decision with the fabulous Marcus? Would see continue to cry, “We’re gonna make Barack Obama a (in chorus!) ONE TERM PRESIDENT!”
After winning the Iowa straw-counting poll of the greatest collection of single brain-celled Iowans in the state, she waiting for the media to dog her every step licking up every word of “wise-dom” that she could dribble from her tea-stained lips.
No such go. I mean, Michele is on the far fringes of the crowd jumping up and down, yelling at the top of her lungs: WHAT ABOUT ME? This, no doubt, will begin to crack that ever-so-carefully carved facade of supposed rationality that she has for the most part retained over the last few weeks. Soon the crazy talk will erupt. One can but imagine the pillow talk between her and Ron Paul. Do we have to sacrifice pigs on an altar to get some attention around here?
Meanwhile the “press” has moved on. The new rock star is none other than Ricky Perry, the JOB CREATOR! In his own mind at least. For you see, the press too suffers from the malady of too little time, too much real news, too complicated, too much research, just stay with the fluff, addiction to infotainment.
Everyone is running around like the proverbial “chicken with its head cut off.” What did Rick say? Oh he’s a master of the “room.” He’s part politician, part evangelist, has that way with his voice that just sucks ’em in while his left hand pickpockets them. He’s slick that one. He’s got the CHARISma!
He does, until, the journey is endless “journeyists”, start reading the “oops” history of their new darling. This is new fresh meat. They will employ a few college interns to search the Texas papers reading his previous speeches and actually check out some of those “facts” about job creation and all that horse-poopy, and they will start to dribble it out.
And in a few weeks, somebody will be saying, “isn’t there anyone besides Romney? He’s such a bore.”
So just to get you all started here are a few links to shooting down the Perry excitement:
Charting out the “Texas Miracle” with Krugman
Oh, and our service personnel only respect a “veteran” president.
What you need to know about the Texas governor by Ezra Klein.
And he was for man-made climate change before he was against it.
The Swampland has a whole list of links to bring you up to speed on the “Hair”
The late Molly Ivens on Rick Perry as governor.
AlterNet has 21 reasons why Rick Perry is a disaster.
And then there’s Rick’s Texas Supreme Court, doing his bidding from another branch of government.
Okay, enough already you are screaming.
Hey, we hear that our good pal, Paul “Atlas Shrugged is my bible” Ryan is thinking about making a run for it as well. Now that is some good news.
All together now: Pray hard and every day: “Please God let us have a floor fight at the GOP convention!”
Housekeeping! Okay so I revised and updated the blogroll. It now reflects (I hope) most of the blogs I follow and depend on. If you are a regular and blog and you don’t find you name, please let me know. It was embarrassingly out of date, and there were tons of additions and it’s entirely possible I missed you by mistake.
Also, there are awfully good stories coming out of Rioting Negroes, we are respectable negroes, and Pass the Doucheys. . . Some are very serious, others are utterly knee-slappin’ snot-comin’ out of yer nose, hysterical, with the always present very big grain of truth. Do check them out and become a fan like I have. Links are on the sidebar under Never Miss.
- Rick “Dubya” Perry Sure Does Like Molesting People (queerty.com)
- Slick Rick Perry supports ‘Bi-National’ Health Insurance with Mexico (via BUNKERVILLE | God, Guns and Guts Comrades!) (loopyloo305.wordpress.com)
- Gov. Perry: “Conduct Unbecoming” (goodolewoody.wordpress.com)
- Rick Perry’s Texas is no ‘miracle’ (thegrio.com)