One reliable indicator that God exists, is inexplicable jokes that appear to come along naturally. One can reasonably conclude that God exists, and is enjoying himself at the expense of his children.
Not really at our expense, but using our foibles and idiosyncracies to tickle not only the Godhead, but those of us who “get the joke.”
One such event occurred yesterday. While watching Chris Matthews, he suddenly interrupted the ongoing conversation to announce, “breaking news.”
The news you ask? Why GOP leadership had issued a release indicating that favorite GOPer Michele Bachmann had just been appointed to the prestigious “Intelligence” Committee in the House. The twinkle in Mr. Matthews eye was unmistakable, as were the attempts to keep a straight face on the part of his guests.
Putting the words Intelligence and Michele Bachmann in the same sentence is of course hilariously funny, an oxymoron of the first order. Surely the GOP did not offer this up out of some general desire to amuse the American public. Surely, they probably are too obtuse to even have realized the huge joke they were making. I must thus, conclude, most assuredly, that God made them do it.
I haven’t laughed so hard for so long in a very long time. Thanks GOD!
Such moments of high level levity are usually reserved for Ms. O’Donnell or that paragon of insanity, Ms. Palin.
Speaking of which, after reading that Ms. Palin had had Ms. Kate Gosselin and her litter over for a camp out, and that things, shall we say, had not gone well, well we decided this was too delicious to pass up.
The Contrarian worked his wonders of research on the digital recorder and found a repeat of the show. And I want to tell you, after this episode, we are hooked! This is the worst crap imaginable, and worthy of every low “B” sci-fi or disaster movie ever made. The worse they are, the more fun to watch.
Sarah Palin’s Alaska, is not much about Alaska. Sadly that might make it a good show. It’s as you might assume, all about Sarah. It’s all about how Sarah has grown up huntin’ and fishin’ and camping her way through to this very moment in time. To hear her tell it, she has camped nearly every weekend since her birth.
One wonders then why she had to go to the local gun shop in Wasilla to get a weapon to take to the backwoods. Wouldn’t she have had one all her life? She receives all kinds of advice as to what size killing power she needs there as well. Again, if, as she claims, defending against bear incursion is part of camping, would not the Wasilla wonder already be aware of this as well?
She carts Kate, who is not likin’ any of this bear business, to a “learn to return” seminar on how to react to bears if one meets one, and then on to some range practice. For the “hunter” we are surprised to see that she seems unaware of where the safety is, and other such obvious things. Basically, she just pulls the trigger. Kate tries it once, as does Willow, with mom advising her to “tuck that cheek into the stock”.
The camping trip starts off ominously, with showers. They fly into the camp on the shores of a river. Palin and company “prepare” the camp for the Kate and kids fly-in. They arrive, and Kate begins what is to be a non-stop complaint about everything. It’s too cold, too rainy, too buggy. She spends the day standing under a tent, watching as her kids fish, gather rocks and make a map, gather firewood and generally investigate all the interests of the outback.
The kids eat hot dogs and hamburgers made from moose, and roast marshmallows and make S’mores. Kate, takes a teeny bite of a hot dog, whines, “what is this?” and puts it aside. This after moaning for hours that she is starved.
A bit longer, and she declares she has had it. She wants to leave. She gathers her unhappy brood and carts them back to a plane to return to the “lodge”. Willow demurs to “walk them to the plane, and tells Mom not to either. The Palin’s remain and camp out as planned.
One wonders if Sarah asked her “people” to find the world’s most obnoxious woman, since it is undeniable that she looked good by comparison. One comes away with a new-found sympathy for Jon, who must have been a saint to put up with such a downer-human for so many years.
Sarah, of course, gives commentary throughout. We are told how you just accept what comes in Alaska, enjoying the scenery. “No matter the weather, we have fun,” she says. As to Kate, she allows that “she was out of her element,” but “come on, it wasn’t that bad.”
We are lectured on the virtues and principles that people like herself embody–the tough-minded, the make do with what you have, the suck it up mentality of people like herself. This over against the likes of Kate who represents all that is soft and indulgent in America.
Sarah goes out of her way to explain about the next door neighbor, the writer whom she just can’t stand, and built a fence to block his view. She goes on and on about it. Twice, she brings up, “seeing Russia from where ever she is.” These are jokey asides, yet they reflect Sarah’s thin skin.
We learn that Sarah doesn’t take perceived slurs against her well, and doesn’t forget them. They gnaw at her, and she invariably turns to ad hominem attacks to “get back” at those who she feels have done her wrong. More than two years later, she is still being eaten alive by these old faux pas of her own making.
Therein it seems to me is the way to keep Sarah off-track. Keep pointing out the mistakes, the errors, the slips of the tongue. They keep her fully occupied with ways to retaliate, usually against the wrong target, but no matter. They keep her focus in the wrong place. We need not fear that she will ever waste a moment actually learning anything that might make her a viable candidate.
So, I say, watch Sarah. What comes out of her mouth will not match what she is doing. It is a laugh-filled riotous and utterly boring show, filled with congruences and contradictions. The up side, is that Sarah does not accomplish what she sets out to do which is to establish herself as the embodiment of American ideals, virtues and motherhood. She comes off as a self-centered woman who is trying desperately to broader her appeal, all the while acting in an opposite fashion.
It’s a fraud and an obvious tissue of lies.
Related Articles
- Video: Kate Gosselin Makes Sarah Palin Look Positively Presidential (crushable.com)
- Kate Gosselin Runs Around Reading (justjared.buzznet.com)
- Kate Gosselin, Sarah Palin Had “Zero Chemistry” on “Terrible” Trip (omg.yahoo.com)
- Kate Gosselin Absolutely Abhors Sarah Palin’s Alaska [Video] (jezebel.com)
Existential Ennui 