“I’ve never found breast jiggling particularly attractive.” So said the Contrarian near the end of day eight minus Wilber, the computer. You see to the level we have sunk? Commenting on Dancing with the Stars, we have become experts on ballroom technique.
It has not been a pretty time around the meadow this week plus, as we lived without the elderly computer interface. I should probably not tell of all the hideous incidents that transpired, but what the hey, you probably need the laugh. The economy hasn’t improved much, and they sent Shirley Temple around the country to keep ’em grinning, so I guess I should do my part.
Here is how it all began:
Day One, Monday, March 9: I awoke, suspecting nothing untoward. I never awake in a good mood mind you, but it was no worse than usual. I examined my plans and stomped to the kitchen to start water for coffee. The Contrarian groused that the “maintenance” was taking longer than usual, and he hadn’t had a chance to play poker this morning. “But it should be ready by the time you usually go on.” I mumbled nothing much in reply. I’m not good at talking first thing.
By 9:00, the Contrarian was getting disturbed. “It’s really running through its clean-up slow today. I’m not sure it’s gonna be ready for you at 10:00.” “Don’t worry about it, I’m fine, it’s not big deal.” Little did I know of course. By 11:00 the Contrarian was starting to sweat. “It’s going through the cleanup a second time, but that’s usually really fast, so you’ll be on by noon thirty,” he chimed. “Okay,” I retorted. I was being my conciliatory best still. So calm, so cool, so very perfect was I.
By 12:30, the second go round was proceeding just as slowly as the first. There was a definite pout in the voice of the Contrarian now. “I hope it is done by after dinner. At least you can get some kind of post up today.” I nodded, a bit peeved, but I was still pretty darn stoic for me.
By 3:00, dear hubby was apologizing profusely. “It’s going through a THIRD time,” he whined. “It’s not your fault for goodness sakes! It’s just a mess and you have done the best anyone could do. You have done a herculean job. It’s just needs to be taken in.” He kinda nodded in agreement. “Well, hopefully, you can get on tomorrow for a bit, and then, when the weather improves we’ll take it in.”
It never got any better through the evening, and finally was found dead around 9:00 p.m. “Well we can’t take it tomorrow, that’s for sure. The rain has been heavy and shows no signs of stopping. The lane will be a mess.” “We’ll see,” he grumped.
Day Two, Tuesday, March 10: The day dawned grey, along with my mood. The rain continued. There was no point in even thinking about trying to traverse the lane. Wednesday was our earliest day to get in. I tried to keep a stiff upper lip, busying myself with my spiritual practices, some housework, and then reading. Being in a generally bad mood, I could not get enthused with knitting or anything crafty.
We sat in silence. “Watch whatever you want to,” the Contrarian offered generously. “No, no watch what you wish, I don’t watch anything during the day. I just have it on for the noise factor,” I remarked. He insisted I turn on the “soaps” at noon. He picked up a book. I watched half-heartedly. These things sure proceed slowly when you aren’t engaged in anything else!
Two hours later, we were having dinner and playing our round of jeopardy. What to do then! As the Contrarian flipped from MSNBC to Fox, and then to The Lone Ranger, I stared off into space. “I’m going to take a nap,” I mumbled. “Okay,” was the reply.
At 4:00, I got up, and he again, urged, “watch what you want babe.” “No, no, I’ll read.” Thank goodness the evening was closing in and normality could return.
Day Three, Wednesday, March 11: Well at least we could now get Wilber into the hospital, and see about his being revived. That was the only bright spot in the early morning. I mentioned a few stops and pickups, and figured it was good for a lunch in town. The Contrarian agreed, though he was a bit less than enthusiastic. I suspect in the end, it sounded better than returning home and pushing the remote back and forth at each other again.
We dropped off Wilber, amid the usual assurances that “we will have you up and running in no time,” and returned home around 2:30. “Oh darn, babe, your soaps are over!” The tone was one of lament, but I could see that it was forced and pretense was key. He was actually happy not to have to endure them! I sighed, and picked up a book. I looked eagerly at the clock, only thirty minutes until my nap time!
At four, “please, isn’t there something you wish to watch?” “Well, I used to watch a soap at 4, but really I don’t want to disturb your Lone Ranger or Andy Griffin, or whatever.” “Okay, you watch your soap, I insist.” I looked gratefully at my dear husband, but he was already making for the bed to take HIS nap.
Day Four, Thursday, March 12: I struggled with housework and devoted even more time to spiritual matters. God was not pleased. He likened it to a girl who wanted to go shopping but all her “real” girlfriends were busy, and so she settled on the hanger-on girl that she didn’t care that much about. “You’d drop me in a hot minute if that computer were here!” God glowered.
I admitted the truth of that. It would do no good to lie after all. God was, well God and knew the truth. Still I stubbornly added another 30 minute meditation session to the day.
We continued in the reading, napping, rotation, all the time, both of us, hoping upon hope to hear the phone ring. Oh pleazzzzzzzzzze, ring. Tell us that Wilber is okay again. We are dying here! Such was the private prayer we both whispered secretly, though we made jokes that “I bet she’ll be ready any minute,” laughing and then saying sagely, “no, I’m sure it won’t be until tomorrow.”
Day Five, Friday, March 13: Well it was Friday the Thirteenth, so what can one expect? The Contrarian waited a decent time after opening, around tenish I would say, and called the computer hospital. I strained to listen, but tried not to, but did. The conversation was terse: “I see. Yes, I expected that….Okay, you can?…..Oh, well, okay. You bet.”
“It won’t be ready until Monday.” The words struck like a slap in the face. Monday?????? That meant all the weekend, and no soap operas to even lighten the time. I’m frickin tired of reading, and sleeping, and making extra special meals. I want my computer!!!!!! I said none of this of course, just nodded. “I don’t think we are a priority,” I said quietly. “No, we most certainly are not.”
The gloom was palpable. The withdrawal was not over by a long shot.
Day Six, Saturday, March 14: Waking with dread. What in the world was I going to do all day? I tried to stretch everything out to the max. The Contrarian was finding more to do outside, most odd for him. The weather was improving, that was good.
God was getting more time. He laughed. “Humor me, will ya? Give me some great insight, a blast of planetary compassion, some deep spiritual truth,” I moaned. “Go write a book,” he cackled. God cackling is truly a scary thing. “Oh thanks, ” I snarled. “And about what?”
“About you of course. All first novels are autobiographical. You should know that. Write about what you know. Do it backwards and forwards. You as an old woman, reflecting on her life. Each chapter back and forth.”
“I don’t have a computer, remember? It’s in hospital, ( ya like that dropping of the article? The Contrarian hates that, but I think it’s kinda sexy myself.) or did you forget? You don’t expect me to write long hand do you?”
“Suit yourself, crabby one. But you write in your head all the time.” God shrugged. “Do as you please, I’m off to play some cricket in Mumbai. See you later.”
Day Seven, Sunday, March 15: Well, what is left of my sanity is holding on. Church helped a lot. A wonderful sister from the Franciscan Retreat Center in Cedar Rapids gave a lovely talk that was like a mini retreat for an hour before services. I connected with people I had missed through e-mails about the library. Services were wonderful. I felt rejuvenated.
We watched a movie in the afternoon. A murder mystery. It was pretty much okay, and soon the evening was at hand. Tomorrow we were to get Wilber back! We were going to make it!
Day Eight, Monday, March 16: No waiting today, the Contrarian was on the phone a bit after nine. I was planning my post for the day, sure that I would be able to get it in before dinner.
I heard again, the one sided conversation: “Yes, oh, I see, …..Well, I thought that might be the case,….Can you?….Oh I see, no way that…..Oh well, in that case, I guess that would be the best…..okay, yes, …..well at least get us something that we can start with…..you bet.” CLICK.
This didn’t sound at all good. And it was not. “The hard drive is ruined. Can’t be fixed. It won’t cost much for a new one, but we will lose everything. They might be able to retrieve some stuff from the old one, but I told them to just start us fresh for now, so we can get back up. ”
That sort of sunk in, and I began to realize quickly that that meant everything was going to be downloaded again. A new Firefox, a new WP, all new, and I was going to lose a ton of things from WP, all kinds of files, files that held passwords and HTML script. And all my pictures for my blog, and oh the list was long.
Nothing to do but accept the inevitable. Hope I could find some of my “favorites” again. At least the email and reader was retrievable by password and my blog of course was okay and contained a lot of information itself. In all, not the worst of times.
Day Nine, Tuesday, March 17: The Contrarian called again, as early as possible. They said by noon. We’re starting to get peeved at the apparent lack of interest in getting our single computer fixed. Not fixed, it’s new. Henrietta I should think. Still an old dial up clinker, but all spiffy new on the inside.
The Contrarian left at eleven thirty, to be there at noon. I was busy with corned beef and cabbage. We still have lots of water puddles from the melting and unfreezing, and I wished him well down the lane. He made it, and returned with our girl about 12:45.
By dinner he had a new dial-up installed, and the mail back in play. I’m not sure what else, but I was able to get on and leave you all that short message and pull up a few pages and reinsert my passwords. Over the evening we got WP, Firefox, PokerStars and the printers back up. So we aren’t doing too badly at all.
It’s going to be a few more days before I get back to reading blogs. I still have to find a new photo editing program to find, I can’t find the one I had. He has the camera stuff to install yet. I have to find my grocery list site again, and like I said, more stuff like a letterhead and well, the list is long. But I’m back to work at least!