Tag Archives: Foxy Noise

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Oiling Ma Guns and Sharpenin’ Ma Knives

I may be reasonably optimistic about next Tuesday, but I am heeding the warnings.

What warnings you ask?

Why those trumpeted by all this brilliant Rightie-Tightie types who are sure that Armageddon, nuclear holocaust, civil insurrection, anarchy, or general downright pissyness is in store should Obama be defeated.

What you say? The gun-totin’, Bud-swilling, butt-crack showin’ Teabuggery crew is gonna explode in violence should the dark one be unseated?

No silly. It’s us! The 47%’ers, who are nothing more than money-grubbing, socialist-leaning, welfare wallowing, takers! We are gonna rise up with our pitchforks (or the urban equivalent) and make war upon the Republican world for taking away our cushy lifestyles. You know, the ones we now enjoy thanks to the socialistic provisions like social security, medicare, Medicaid, unemployment pay, welfare, food stamps, PELL grants, and anything else stamped with a big fat F for FREE. Cuz the GOP is takin’ it away, and we ain’t gonna stand for it.

So, just to be safe, I’m preparin’ myself to go on a shooting spree, and I’m gonna take aim at all those MERR-SAAAA-DEEE’S BENDS that my girl Janis sang about. Lord didn’t give me one, so I’m taken one on  my own.

Now, I did not learn all this by my own sweet smellin’ brain operation, I want you to know. I learnt it from those fine fuzzy minds that I so have grown to love over the years.

Case in point.

Joseph Farah.

Now, Joe, (his friends call him Joe and I do so feel friendly toward him), Joe says that should the President win, life in this world will be simply unlivable. He says the following is absolutely certain to follow:

There may not be another free and fair election in America.

I would expect due process to go the way of the horse and buggy.

I think he will move to shut down and destroy all independent media.

In fact, I think his biggest critics will be rounded up in the name of national security.

So, you know, right-thinking good Americans must do whatever it takes to make sure that don’t happen. I mean make sure the great tanned man is defeated. That sure sounds a lot worse than me co-opting a car for goodness sake!

But oh my, if he does lose, then the worstest of all things will happen:


Nobody less than Bryan Fischer says this, and you know he is never wrong.

Now this is all beginning to look a lot like damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

This is probably why there is virtually a run on anti-hallucination medicine everywhere in the US. The GOP is gobbling up those pills like no tomorrow, trying to maintain some sort of reality based sanity in what can only be described as pure puke insanity.

To win or not to win? That is the question. Tis it nobler to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortitude. . . .? Hamlet didn’t know, and I sure don’t either.

But either way, I think it mighty fine advice to get ready for a few bubbles to burst, a few heads to explode, and that the only meaningful head movement may end up being side to side, an equivocator’s dream you must admit.

No more stable and even-headed human than Billo the Clown, weighed in on the troubling upsurge in Democratic-violence sounding with this:

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I want the Republican Party to know if your voter suppression throughout this beautiful country enables Romney to oust Barack Obama, we will burn this (EXPLETIVE DELETED) town.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: If the Republicans steal this election, I’m going to track down Mitt Romney and give him the world’s biggest (EXPLETIVE DELETED) punch.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

O’REILLY: That first woman who was swearing 97 years old. And that spot was helped out by our pal Michael Moore. So now, the far-left is threatening violence if President Obama loses the election. That’s what they are doing with old ladies.

Now, Billo goes on to say that the Democratic party isn’t responsible for MoveOn, but he’s now “uneasy” about the direction of the Democratic Party, and if you vote for Obama, you accept these “loons” as part of the party. Furthermore, the President’s failure to repudiate them, makes him “culpable” to “some” degree.

Yes, old women are certainly dangerous aren’t they? We are “turning” old ladies into suicide bombers? Ya think?

So, I’m not taking chances, no sirree. I’m preparing. Either to defend myself, or to go out hunting me some GOP’ers who are takin’ away my guv’mint dole. Billo after all, wouldn’t mislead me would he? No, certainly not.

I’m thinking that the almost best thing in the world is to not give a shit and be say, Norwegian, and just sit and watch 300+ million people go completely wiggers. I hear Iceland is tired of being in the cold and will offer up the entire island as a lunatic bin for Americans. After all, the land is still worth something. Negotiations are beginning with Native Peoples.

I’m prepared. Are you?

More proof that the Right is Right, and Up is Down and Left is Right, and Oh cry me a river woncha?

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He’s NOT a Hoarder, So He Says

The problem with most men, is that they have a tendency to have failed to grow up. It’s called “arrested development”.

You’ve heard me before about the peanut butter jar. Lid askew, peanut butter smeared on the side, a sticky knife stuck to the counter–that’s how we leave the scene.

No female, even a young one, would leave such a mess, but boys never grow up on this issue, or at least a substantial number of them don’t.

As many of you know, we’re in the midst of packing to move. Make that “I”m in the midst of packing to move.” The Contrarian has so far “packed” one drawer of ‘tools’ which now lies on the floor. He’s “planning” his next escapade into the closet any day now.

Meanwhile, I’m on my second tour, now packing haphazardly all the small items that are not at this date deemed essential. And clearing off out shelves of throw-aways so the piece of furniture can be picked up and toted out with ease.

So this morning, I’m clearing off the side board, which has been cleaned out, but still harbors a ton of “stuff” on top. I have a garbage bag at the ready to deposit the throw-outs, such as a forlorn pair of partially used candles and the corner off a bird-feed container. (Let’s just say, I’ve decided that housework is a joke at this point) Anyway, as I pick up this or that and stick in a general box for shipping, I come across a stone-like whitish object laying on the top.

“What is this?” I turn holding it for his perusal.

“Oh,” he grins a bit sheepishly, and then smiles, “that’s my tooth.”

Now, he had had a loose tooth for years, and finally it gave up and fell out. This was old news. Several months old, which tells you how long it has been since I took a serious clear the decks attitude toward that side board.

“YOUR TOOTH!!!” I shrieked. “What is YOUR TOOTH doing there?”

“Well, I didn’t exactly know what to do with it, ya know.”

“Well I can tell you where I would put it, you hoarder!”

“I am not a hoarder!” he wailed.

Uhuh, if you can top that one, please do tell.

We purchased a car yesterday, and feel quite satisfied with our find. It was in our price range, in our model range, and seems to be in good working condition, nice body, and clean. It’s at the end of the driveway awaiting our leave-taking.

Much of this has been like somebody giving you a spoon at the Hoover Dam and telling you to dig a hole through it. For the longest time, you seem to make no dent, then a trickle of water is seen, and well, then, watch out! We are at that tipping point in the move where things are starting to really move fast. I’m actually starting to get excited.

The lie that Willard promotes the most often is that “under Obama’s watch, over 800,000 jobs have been lost”. And of course he knows that it is not true. All the more egregious because the way he arrives at that number is to play a dishonest accounting game that should be beneath a guy why claims so much economic gravitas.

What Willard does, is start the counting on January 1, 2009. But Obama wasn’t even sworn in until January 20, 2009. As of March 1, 2009, the Economic Recovery Act had just been signed and little of the money disbursed yet, and the economic team was not yet assembled.  If you start the clock at the March 1 date, then the net loss was only 102,000 jobs, and then the tide turns and the numbers climb upward from that point.

Willard obviously knows this, yet it serves his meme to continue misleading people with this unfair time frame.

Willard doesn’t want you to think that he shares the GOP agenda to put women in their places. So he has taken to surrounding himself with females in photo ops. The trouble is, the women he chooses are women who voted against the Lily Ledbetter Law and the Paycheck Fairness Act. I’m not sure how that is supposed to help, unless it’s to point out that Willard doesn’t agree with these laws either. In which case, he embraces I guess the GOP position enunciated in Republican-controlled legislatures all over the country–of controlling women’s lives and their bodies. If you would like the truth on the claim that 92% of the jobs losses were women, which is also a lie, then read this post with some good graphic evidence.

The man simply lies and lies.

I assume that our delightful Rep Alan West figured it was a good idea to guesstimate that some 75-81 Congressional Democrats were Communists. Course he’s denying it now, but of course there is video, here. The Communist Party also had some things to say about the allegations.

That should sure help him out in his delusional idea that he might get a nod as VEEP.

Oh this is just funny doncha think?

I just giggled when I saw it.

I wish I was some kind of artist.

But I’m artistic with words.

Or perhaps I’m not. But I enjoy thinking I am.

That George Zimmerman chose to run for “help” to Fox Noise is no accident. It’s par for the course. It’s how Fox  is viewed, and no amount of denial on their part can fix that. It didn’t occur in some vacuum. It’s because of the things that are said there. And no greater proof of that is that on their website, they cannot keep the comment section scrubbed of the vile racist diatribe that is constantly being posted there by their followers. K Street has a link from Daily Kos and a listing of some of those comments with all their “likes” attached. You can read about ten before you have had enough.

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Life on A Neutron Star

Frida Kahlo "Sun and Life"

Oh yeah, it’s Friday.

We got a little something for everyone, or everything for someone, or nothing for nobody. Pick yer poison.

My husband, the Contrarian, had the audacity (of hope?) to move the channel indicator to #360, which in this land, is Fox country. Just in time to see Megyn (I prove that blonds are dumb) Kelly try to add up how many fingers she had on one hand.

Seriously, this peroxide-poisoned air head spends hours chasing her one brain cell around in the padded room that is called her “dressing room.”

She was alerting all of us that the President was probably a dirty sneaky bastard. She was referring to the fact that the President was phoning some Senators and urging them to vote down the amendment regarding the Keystone Pipeline.

To Megyn with the minus  range IQ, this meant that the President’s earlier statement that he was opened minded about the pipeline was pure bull. I mean he wasn’t acting very open-minded was he, calling Senators and lobbying for a no vote?

It was patiently explained to the “born that way bimbo” that the President stopped the pipeline because studies on it hadn’t been completed when he was FORCED BY THE REPUBLICANS for a decision. THE STUDIES STILL HAVEN’T BEEN COMPLETED which is why he urged a no vote because he would HAVE TO VETO IT and THE REST OF THE BILL TO WHICH IT WAS ATTACHED. So it had nothing to do with his being open-minded, the Republicans were intent on deja vu’ing the entire thing again, and he was reminding everyone he would have to issue the same denial again. This has nothing to do with his ultimate decision which is DEPENDENT ON THE OUTCOME OF THE STUDIES!

Megyn, alas cannot reason this through. It is but another examine of Republican inability to reason rationally.

Once upon a time, there was a law student, president of the Law Review, named Barack Obama. He spoke in defense of a university professor, who was black and on a strike of sorts to force the University to employ more minority faculty. This was on tape, with the future President speaking extemporaneously and quite eloquently. At the end, he introduced the professor, embraced him in a hug, and that was that.

This tape had been in the possession of PBS for years, and had been aired some four years ago as I guess part of a montage on the early life of the President.

Enter Andrew Breitbart, or exit as the case may be.

Mr. Breitbart has been teasing Fox with the notion that he had dynamite footage of Obama that would blow the 2012 election into a fireball of controversy. He promised to give it up to the Pointy-finger man with IQ 3 painted on his forehead, Sean Hannity. Breitbart dies, apparently of natural causes.

But wait. Not so fast.

Conspiracy theorists leap forward to query–might the blessed Breitbart have been murdered in order to prevent the dissemination of this damning video?

And Fox had it.

We waited.

We saw.

We yawned.

But wait, Sean pleaded. Don’t you see?

He has his hands mysteriously in his pockets (I swear . . .Blaze nuts discussed this at length. . . the sinisterness of which escapes me, only to devolve into the child-like sexual giggling that is what these people do best).

He was “pallin’ around with radicals”. The professor in question Derrick Bell, was a proponent of a theory called “critical race theory”. Now Fox pundits are unable to understand this term, but they infer that it has to do with whitey is bad, always has been, always will be.

All of this adds up, the in logic meets fantasy land of Fox, that the President has a long and evil history of race hatred and class warfare.

If you care to understand the basics of Critical Race theory, go here and here. Don’t bother with Wikipedia. The right and left are adding and subtracting to it as fast as you can hit enter, trying to make it mean what they want.

Never was a video so tortured to construct a scenario that  is somehow evil.

And once again, we learn what reasoning amounts to in Republican land. Oh, and at least temporarily, to pursue the terrorist president angle, Republicans agreed to ignore their other issues: that the President really didn’t go to Harvard, and can’t speak without a teleprompter. (remember, it’s a file cabinet, not a computer up there)

Poor old Rush. He meant to cause a kerfuffle and help Republicans. He ended up doing the opposite, and worse, he ended up helping the cause of contraception. What could be a better downer to sex than this? (courtesy of Juanita Jean!)

It’s comforting to know that both Sarah Palin and Alan West stand ready to come to the aid of their country if asked. I know I sleep better knowing that.

Arizona, that bastion of freedom, is pushing around a bill that would absolve doctors from suit, should they “forget” or not bother to inform potential mothers of prenatal birth defects. This is order to stop frivolous law suits. Or is this in order to allow Christianist doctors to deny information to women that might be used to determine if an abortion is in order? Who in the hell wants a doctor who decides what type of information you should get?

I feel so much safer knowing that I only have to open up the bible to know all I need to know about climate change. So says that titan of intellect, James Inhofe, Senator (seriously he is one) from Oklahoma. Well Oklahoma, yeah, I guess that explains it. Seriously. Does he have a caretaker?

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have now returned to earth orbit. Kindly belt up for landing. We hope you have enjoyed your tour with Neutron Star lines. Our Motto:YOUR’RE ONLY AS CRAZY AS YOU THINK YOU ARE

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They Have No Merge Files Button

It really helps to understand the GOP to know that they have no MERGE FILES button. In other words, they minds operate like file cabinets and not computers.

While we receive no information and compare it with all the information we have thus far collected, they simply open a new folder, insert, and place in the cabinet, to be pulled forth as “truth” as needed. If it conflicts with something else already in the file cabinet? They will never know. They will never check. It’s not how their brains work.

In Romney World, television and movies are real. At least some of them. At least the ones he watched that convinced him that he could hire somebody to scrub the information highway of any and all contradictory statements made by his very own self.

It’s good that Willard likes to fire people, because he needs to fire that guy. Right away.

In one of those surreal moments, some elderly type lady stood up in some Romney campaign event and literally begged Willard to guarantee and promise, and say assertively, yes or no, “WILL YOU REPEAL OBAMA CARE?”

He answered, “Why wouldn’t I?” and then went on to blather on about how “from the very start, I always said very clearly, that this is what we wanted in Massachusetts, and it in no way meant it was right for anybody else, any state, and certainly not the federal government.”

Except that.

Except that he did say just the opposite. Not once. Not twice. Not three times, but at least four times so far that have been documented. And with video tape. (Expect this to come up in an ad coming to a TV near you!)

Now, some suggest that the GOP must be dumber than a dead fly on the windshield not to have found any of this stuff until now. But others pipe up and suggest that this might well be coming from the Obama camp, dribbled out now and then, just enough to keep the cauldron simmering. I rather like that idea.

Beyond the phenomenal ability of The Willard camp to not know, remember, or think it can be buried, lies a more puzzling issue. It too can be answered by the merge file syndrome. It is the bizarre hatred for “Obamacare” as it is known throughout TeaMob® land.

Of course, much of this comes from Fox Noise and the far-far-far right, which hates these types of programs (medicare, Medicaid, social security, food stamps, welfare, unemployment insurance) anyway. They have labeled universal health care as the first, fifth or last step before we descend into the hellfire of socialism. The fact that any number of countries have socialism in one form or another and their people seem rather happy (happier than Americans generally) is a point never mentioned.

Anyway, as I said, the right wingnuttery brigade has drunk the kool-aid and they are convinced that universal health care is bad, and more bad. While leads me to this post by Ezra Klein about health care in general.

Here are some facts:

  1. Republicans like to demand tort reform to “cut down on frivolous lawsuits” which they claim drive up health care costs. FACT: all lawsuits account for less than one-half of one percent of all costs in health care. Moreover, what is frivolous? It is well documented that more mistakes are made by American doctors than those in any other countries.
  2. Fact: 21% of all health care costs are eaten up by administrative costs. This is in the private sector. In Medicare, administrative costs amount to 3% of total costs.
  3. Doctors make far more in salaries in the US than elsewhere in the world.
  4. Based on a value index, the US ranks far down the list, behind Canada, Japan, Germany, Britain, France, Brazil, India, and China. This is overall health of its citizens. The idea that we get the best care is simply not true.

Just a few facts.

NOTE: the idea of merge files is from Robert Altemeyer and his book The Authoritarians. He finds this a universal trait pretty much of the fundamentalist mind. They hold a head full of contradictory information that they never allow to confront each other. Frankly, they are unaware of this probably.

As you might expect, the Foxy Noise Makers are busily trying to attach the rise in gasoline prices to Mr. Obama. Yes, what would you expect. Except that back in 2008, when prices went over $4 a gallon, they were busily trying to remind people that not only was it not Bush/Cheney’s fault, but “”[N]o president has the power to increase or to lower gas prices.“

I guess Foxy should fire the guy who wiped their information highway as well.

I think it runs in the family: Ann Romney says she doesn’t feel wealthy. Awwww, ain’t that special?  Exactly how much would it take Ann, to feel wealthy?

“This is not a political war at all. This is not a cultural war.
This is a spiritual war.”
……………… —US Presidential Candidate Rick Santorum

Oh for a GOP candidate who could keep their mouth shut. So prays Reince *rinsed penis* Priebus . As overheard by The Matrix.

If you think I’m stretching a point, well try running for office in Laurens County South Carolina, where party members must sign a pledge: that among others things claims that they had no premarital sex, will be faithful to their spouse, that your spouse is of the opposite sex, and,.  .  .  . oh who cares what else.

Was it something I said? Can you imagine having to grovel in the hopes of saving your job when you meant every word you said and then some? Welcome to Rush’s world. I’m laughing. I know it’s impolite to chortle at the misfortunes of others, but, God help me, this is a hoot. And, did I mention, deserved? He’s now reduced to pouting, “I’M JUST A RAPPER!”

RUSH: This is all part of the culture deteriorating, because fewer and fewer people and fewer and fewer businesses and fewer and fewer institutions actually have a moral core, or they’re not willing to stand up for their moral core. And you talk about the double standard, one of the greatest illustrations of it is that rappers can practically say anything they want about women, and it’s called art. And they win awards for it. I don’t know about you, I have some television shows that I like, and I TiVo ‘em, and the P-word that stands for urinate is common now. Or when you’re ticked off, you are p–. It’s common. The word bitch is common. In sitcoms, in television dramas.

Happy Tuesday.

What’s on the Stove: Vichysoisse and ham and cheese toasted sammies.

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A Lot is Up for Grabs Today

Today is the big day.

It seems like only a few weeks ago that the streets of Madison were filled with angry citizens, come to tell their gestapo-type governor that they would not stand for his draconian laws that stripped good working people of their money, they benefits and offered them up to business interests in the guise of “balancing the budget.”

Wisconsin’s shanghaing was the talk of the country as Governor Walker held the hard-line oblivious to the desires of his constituents.

Well it all comes down to today when up to six Republicans are up for recall. And nobody is quite sure how it will come out. According to some sources, a couple of the GOPers trying to save their jobs are now pointing fingers at the Governor, claiming that he threatened them, forcing them to go along with his union-busting plans. And it appears that none of the GOP stooges chose to use Walker in their “don’t throw me out” campaigns.

Everything is at stake here. Much more than people realize. Are Democrats and union people just flash in the pan blowhards or do they have what it takes to stay the course and follow through? If the Republicans maintain control of the Wisconsin legislature, you can be sure that Walker and his Koch-henchfolk will be further emboldened to take even worse actions against the people. And this all bodes ill for Democrats in the nation.

Pray if you do, and cross your fingers if you don’t.

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Word is that Ricky Perry is about to announce a run for the GOP nomination. Mr. “we might have to secede” Perry will be a welcome addition to the group of goofs already in the action. I for one find Mitt “I am trying to look like the common man” Romney just a greasy snake oil salesman. Perry has plenty of skeletons in his closet we may be assured.

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Name a scientist (other than Stephen Hawking!). Dare ya. Michio Kaku? Brian Cox? All three are media favorites. We watch tons of cosmology shows on Discovery and so forth, yet, I am afraid I can’t remember the names of hardly any of those theoretical physicists. If we are a singularly un-intellectual nation, part of the reason may be the natural reluctance of scientists to engage in the body politic. Ain’t it about time they did? The NYTimes addresses the issue.

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Did I tell ya about the fabulous Pass the Doucheys on the Right Hand Side? Well if I didn’t, I am now. You really need to read this lady. She is snarky as all get out, right on politically, and funny as hell. Need I say more? This piece is about raising kids and the serious question of a very very stupid woman who worries about satan, dinosaurs, and rocks can’t be bones. Confused? Well get on over there and read it!

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We are so used to it that it becomes funny. Rethugs consistently turn on a slug. They must never have heard of flip-flopping before they attached it to John Kerry, but they all seemed to have learned the art. I guess they saw the sense of it since their followers are dumber than a nose hair that lands in your soup. See you can say really really inconsistent things when your following is too dull to recognize it.

Michele of course was utterly against raising the debt limit, suggesting that any downgrade would have no real effect. Now of course she is shrieking that the President is to blame, and “left Washington” instead of running to the nearest microphone and urging calm.

Foxy Noise is no exception. A few days ago, Neal Cavuto (a dull bulb if there ever was one) and John Stossel (who never met a fact he couldn’t twist out of reality) were musing that a downgrade might be a very good thing for America. It was the right thing for Restuplicans to hold the country hostage and cause this result. Now that it has happened, it’s a “tragedy” and all Obama’s fault.

Okay Mr. TeaNutz®, now scratch your expanding belly, belch, and go get another beer.

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Come on, tell me you didn’t start counting the minute you heard that the Palinator’s son just had a baby. Yeah, his bride was pretty darn pregnant when they tied the knot. And a little extra goodie on the link. Instead of the latest Bristol Creme claim that “she basically was too drunk to realize that she had been taken advantage of”, maybe she might have been a bit more knowledgeable. Go read the link and enjoy. Just call me trashy rumor!

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See this is how Foxy Noise works. First they find a “concerned parent” to talk about how inappropriate she feels it is for Wisconsin teachers to be teaching her children about the history of the union movement. This of course is played up with excerpts being used often. What Fox doesn’t tell you is that the “concerned parent” is also a GOP operative, actually the chair of her county GOP party. What Fox also doesn’t tell you is that the woman subsequently resigned after crashing her car while drunk driving with her three children in the car. Now that’s some kind of “concerned parent” ain’t it?

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That’ll do it.

 

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