A Feather Adrift

Tuesdays With Morons

Sherry — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 16:26:38 +0000

Wheeeee! They are at it again. Voting. Or as we call it, “eating their spinach.” Which idiot this time?

Odds on favorite is Mittens.

Mittens reminds us all again that he wants to be president more than anything in the whole wide world. His handlers are gleefully taking credit for having reshaped “their” candidate to outperform the competition.

No more Mr. Nice-guy for the Mittens.

He went after Newt with a vengeance, and with a certain amount of enjoyment, the same pompous arrogance he used in the debate when he said if an underlying of his came to him with an idea to put a colony on the moon, he would “fire him.” Mittens likes to fire folks.

Meanwhile, Newt has responded in the way Newt responds–with equal venom. And a promise to carry the now very personal fight, on to the convention.

I think Mittens has over stepped here. Newt strikes me as a guy who once he feels personally attacked in this vicious way, will spare nothing to “take Mitt down.” Nothing will stand in the way, I suspect. He will not care. It will be about destroying Mitt.

There is a really good read over at We are Respectable Negroes. Glenn Feldman, historian and scholar, from the College of Arts and Sciences, U of Alabama, Birmingham has a book out called Painting Dixie Red: When, Where and Why and How the South Became Republican. More important he’s written an essay about it and you can read it here. Really interesting stuff.

Life with dial-up. Oh I can’t tell you the joys. Yesterday, all of a sudden I couldn’t get on WordPress. No matter what avenue, it just ran and ran, and wasn’t up taking data. Finally in frustration, I went to google to see if there were reports of trouble. Eventually I made my way to the forums and started to ask questions. They were sure it was me, and told me all about my header and background not being “optimized” whatever that means.

I left with no resolution, and worried all night about what I would do, should I not get back here. Well, today I got back, but I was still running very slowly. I finally, in frustration, dumped an “adobe reader update” that I had mistakenly installed Sunday evening. (I say mistaken, since I thought it was Microsoft updates). Well, all the sudden my speed picked up.

So I guess the Adobe was running in the background and taking up my precious speed. I guess. Now my mouse is sticking. But that was happening before, and if I disconnect and reconnect, that has cleared up in the past.

Ain’t all this computer crap just a crock of crap?

Now this is rich.

Remember Alabama and its draconian immigration laws? (some of which have been halted by a federal judge) Remember how crops rotted in the field, because farmers there couldn’t find willing, let alone competent workers to pick? Well, Kansas is not gonna let that happen.

Kansas has petitioned the federal government to allow them to employ undocumented workers. They are not going to wait until the crops rot, they are planning ahead, and they know they have worker shortages. I wonder what the old GOP has to say about that?

We are heading off to the city tomorrow for our food pilgrimage. Stocking up. Such fun. I’m deep in the throes of “making my grocery list.” This is no small task when you are planning for a month. Having to make a menu for the month, then checking each recipe and noting ingredients. It’s a pain. Can’t wait until I can return to weekly shopping and a quick run to the store for X is actually a “quick” run.

Pretty sad when your own side lambastes ya.

Joe Scarborough went after Mitt today about Medicare. Apparently Mormons condone lying, since Mittens has been really heavy on it. He claims, to Floridian elderly, that Obama has cut Medicare by 500 billion, all the while supporting the “Ryan plan” which would gut the program altogether. “Demagoguery” submits Joe. None of it is true.

A good story about how Fox has taken over the Republican party and is now taking the GOP down the dark path to inevitable distruction. The few rational Republicans now weep in the corner, wondering what has happened.

From Don in Massachusetts:

And lest anyone should accuse moi of being unfair, let’s me point you at this article by Jonathan Haidt, who studies the psychology of politics, and has some not so quite nice things to say about liberals.

He claims that conservatives have a much better handle on the American mind than do liberals.

And frankly, to a degree, I don’t disagree, though I don’t think that that makes a lot of difference. That doesn’t make it right, just true. For the moment.

There are plenty in academia who dispute his findings, or his interpretation of them anyway.

It’s and interesting or fascinating read, which ever of my now horribly worn out adjectives you choose. (I need some new ones! HELP!) As always, the comments are very delicious too.

What’s on the Stove? Beef roast, mashed potatoes and gravy, roasted carrots and onions.

Sorry, I know this is a weak post. Sometimes nothing catches me.

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Immigration, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Psychology, Satire, Sociology, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, Fox Noise, GOP, immigration, liberalism, Media, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, psychology

Have I Got a Deal For YOU!

Sherry — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 15:51:50 +0000

Hey, you like pallin’ around with terrorists? Ya like your socialist agenda? Are you tired of all that flag-wavin’ family values namby-pamby rhetoric?

Do your nether regions get all excited when the name Saul Alinsky or Van Jones is mentioned? Do you practically puddle over George Soros?

Do you like the smell of anarchy in the air, and thrill to the feel of a gas mask strapped over your face? Are you a liberal/socialist/commie/fascist/food-stamp lovin’/do-the-monkey-if-it-turns-you-on sort? Are you a SECULARLIST/atheist/hater of the Jesus as exemplified by the literal words from God Almighty secured in the King James Version of the Bible?

Are ya? Do ya? Do ya wanna be?

Then my friends, this is the bloggy for you! We can put you in a sharp little model of all of the above, with nothin’ down and years to pay.

Just a little test to see if you are really OUR kinda people.

Does the name Reince Priebus remind you of a wet hotdog, or worse, a rinsed penis?
If you met Newt Gingrich, would you be unable to resist poking his dough belly?
Would you grab Sean Hannity’s pointy finger and break it?
Does the mere mention of the name Dick Cheney cause you to run for the shower?
Would you first question to Mitch McConnell be: “Can I see your turtle shell?”
Would your first question to John Boehner be: “Do you really fart Cheetos dust?”
Would you like to pull the stick out of Mitt Romney’s butt without or without anesthesia?
Is George W. Bush starting to look tame by comparison?
Are you sure that Ann Coulter’s gynecologist took one look and said she’d have to find someone else to treat THAT.
Which two Republicans would you most like to see face off in a “fight to the death” bout in the Roman Coliseum?

I can’t do this all alone.

I know you think I’m a superhero, but really I’m not.

I get my inspiration from these folks:

Those are the ones who feed my madness on a daily basis. There are many others. They are all to be found in the blogroll.

I thank them all. I condemn them all for my insanity.

Oh, and Bill Moyers is back on the air with a show called “Moyers and Company”. PBS is carrying him of course, times determined by where the heck you live. Find it. He’s always got people on who have actual answers, or at least know the right questions.

Other shows I find useful: (*WARNING*) Ignore unless you are a political junkie.

Chris Hay’s and his show UP on MSNBC on Saturday and Sunday mornings for 2 hours. Panel show where they actually spend some time on various issues and have some good guests. And I like Hays who is damn smart.
Fareed Zakaria’s show on CNN on Sunday (mid morning) He also gets great guests and has intelligent conversations about real issues.
Keith Olbermann on Current TV. Most nights at 8 I think. He’s having his usual contractual issues with the brass, and so his appearance is uneven, but he’s purely fun, and his “Friday’s with Thurber” are wonderful.
Morning Joe, MSNBC, mostly because I like the people and Mika keeps Joe in line.

What I am learning?

That even the GOP circus can get boring at times.
That Catcher in the Rye is not nearly as entertaining as The Great Gatsby was.
That the WSJ refused a paper signed off on by 164 climate scientists in favor of one by 16 climate deniers.
That Sheldon Adelson has way too much money, and is willing to spend it on his own political goals. (There is a 2008 exposé on him in the New Yorker Magazine.)
That we are never going to have government responsive to the people unless we get Citizens United constitutionally prohibited.
That I really don’t care a bit who wins the Super Bowl, and that means I can really just sit back and enjoy it.

Hey, I’m doin’ the best I can.

Bill Maher Wants To Know: ‘Who The F@#k Is Saul Alinsky?’ (kaystreet.wordpress.com)
Dumb Things Party Chairman Say (outsidethebeltway.com)
Moyers: How Big Banks are Rewriting the Rules of our Economy (ritholtz.com)
New Bill Moyers TV Show (blueingreene.org)
Saul Alinsky Has More in Common with Gingrich than Obama (ibtimes.com)
Saul Alinsky: A True American Exceptionalist (mykeystrokes.com)

Filed under: Blog, GOP, Humor Tagged: blogging, Humor

Alien Vapors Permeate the Meadow

Sherry — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 16:23:46 +0000

Yes, Penelope, pictured here, has determined that she is a bird.

She visits during the day and at night.

You can open the door and talk to here. She just continues munching.

We have a lot of freeloaders here in the meadow. I drew the line when she knocked on the door and asked for some catsup.

And I’m very tired of possums imitating ~~foul~~ fowl. It’s unseemly.

It’s confusing to the cats.

: Tigerpixieart by Carrie Hawks

Speaking of cats, one of them has taken up with the gypsies.

He sits and watches the birds at the feeder until he can take no more.

He goes out, climbs up the post next to the feeder, and sits down.

He remains very quiet.

The birds aren’t particularly fooled.

He needs to get himself the little hat I think.

He’s the cat that thinks that if you open the door and there is a raging snow storm going on, he just needs to go to another door, where things will be better.

He also thinks I control these things. He also wants milk every day. He also is the Demon-spawn’s best friend. They hatch conspiracies. I watch both of them carefully. I’m no dummy.

I first saw this at Denise’s place, Pass the Doucheys. . .

I figure it’s closer to the truth than what old Jan has said.

Two mayors, who were standing nearby, dispute her rather egotistical recall of the meeting.

She’s really a gut-less wonder when you get down to it. Remember when she ran from the press a while back?

And I do believe that her unfavorables are higher than her favorables.

And I do believe that any balanced budget she likes to tout is at the expense of the most vulnerable of the citizens she is sworn to care for.

As I said, she is a douche.

How exactly does this dude get women?

I’m missing the allure.

I mean there must be something?

Tell me if you know.

Hey did you hear that John S. “Mr. Grumpies” McCain is giving advice on whom should be chosen as the GOP Vice Presidential candidate?

Is that rich?

But it would be typical of the “New” GOP.

I hear that Rubio may have some problems, besides his rather inflated “my family fought in the revolution (not)” issue. Apparently he’s incapable of living within his means, and his mortgage is weighing him down. Not exactly the kinda guy you want telling other people how they must “tighten their belts” and bear the sacrifice. (it’s nice to have a credit card issued by the government for your day-to-day-expenses ain’t it Rube?)

Here is another question for ya.

How do comedians make a living these days?

I mean, a short trip through the news is all anybody needs to get a good laugh each and every day.

Ain’t it nice that Christianity provides the “get out of jail” card? Just say you are sorry, and voilá, your career is back “ON”.

I’m not sure that is how Jesus meant it to be.

Perhaps Newt will be allowed to let us know who it worked out for him.

I really don’t know why Dr. Paul is having such a tough time in Florida.

You’d think he’d fit right in.

He’s a grouchy old man.

Florida is wall-to-wall grouchy old men.

And they can talk about wrinkles, and ill-fitting suits, and white-hairless shins, and how “young whippersnappers” don’t listen to nobody.

What’s not to like?

It’s not like he’s gonna cancel THEIR Medicaid and Medicare. Only their kids, and heck, doesn’t every conversation among old farts in retirement homes invariably get around to ungrateful children?

He would seem a natural in the wrinkle capital of the world–no offense Scottsdale!

Newt said his first Florida debate was flat because the audience was “prevented” from participating.

After the second, he whined that the noise threw him off and the house was packed with Mitten fans.

Newt says he prepares for the debates by snacking, and ”resting”.

I don’t imagine THAT had anything to do with it.

He’s out of shape. Never expect this to be anything other than a free book tour. And look what happened?

His public demanded that he run.

The average Floridian is just so confused by it all.

I mean between the hairdresser, the shopping, the dog races, the vodka tonics, the endless discussions of physical ailments, and Howard’s sister, Myrtle, it’s hard to filter all this political nonsense.

“That Santorum looks like a nice boy, he’s Catholic you know, and there is some talk about his wife living with a man more than twice her age before he met her, you know, but in this day and age, why who cares about that? but I’ve always said, ‘Carol, you just never really know do you?’ And that’s all I’ve got to say about that!”

“Now that Mitt fella, odd name don’t you think? Is that Mormon do you think? My uncle Melvin used to say, Carol, watch out for them Mormons. Yes he did. He never said why I should, but he said that. I remember. Uncle Melvin was a smart man, he and Aunt Tilda also kept a nice house. He died of a cancer, ate his from the inside out. It was horrible. That man suffered I tell ya.”

“Oh Newt? Now that is a very odd name. I wonder where that came from? He sounds so intelligent. Don’t you think he sounds intelligent. Course Howard says I don’t know a thing, you know how Howard is. He reads the paper every day, so he thinks he’s a genius. In his own mind! But I don’t. Can you trust a man who can’t keep a wife? I mean a president has to put up with a lot don’t you think? Newt, well it doesn’t seem to me that he puts up with a lot. I’m not sure that’s good. We’ll see.”

I plan to vote, if Marilyn gets her doctor’s appointment over early enough. We just made so many plans before we found out about this election thing. But we are going to definitely try to fit it in. It’s important to be a good citizen. I always say that.

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Satire, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, GOP, Humor

Freakin’ Friday Follies

Sherry — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 16:55:55 +0000

“To the moon, Alice, to the Moon!”

I just love Newt.

He gets in front of a bunch of ex-NASA employees, in a very depressed part of the state of FLOOREDA, and he garrrunteees that in his SECOND term of office as POTUS, he will ensure that we have a colony on da moon.

Now, you can call that Newtspah. And you would be right to do so.

But, he’s not our big winner this week.

No, our boy Mittens wins this week.

Why you ask?

Well, because he called out the Newtster on this promise, accusing him. . . .wait for it. . . OF PANDERING to the audience.

He chided Newty for trying to promise his way to the White House by, in each state, finding some pet project that the residents were interested in, and then promising he would give them “it” if they were so kind as to vote for him.

Yes, he did.

And well, go ahead, yell it: THAT’S KINDA LIKE THE POT CALLING THE KETTLE BLACK oh Mitten-man, you who are known for your chameleon-like ability to change position based on the change of wind of public opinion. So ya win this week!

Ahab or dear friend turned us on to this great little link that actually proves to be a rather well done study on the convergence of IQ, conservative thinking, and bigotry. Wanna guess what it tends to show? Dumb people tend to not have the capacity to see the ”big picture” and so tend to fall for the easy simplistic structured and ordered world that conservatism offers. Those who are least capable of abstract reasoning, are more likely to fall for racism and other bigoted ideas.

Was there ever any doubt?

Kevin Drum kinda proves the above study. Right now our boy Newt is the darling of the TeaNutz®, mostly because they have run through all the other possibilities and he’s what’s left. Well, tea bibbers are folks who believe in doing NOTHING about most things, and shrinking government. And at heart, Newt is a guy with grandiose ideas of being a world-wide mover and shaker. And that requires “DOING BIG THINGS”. But being light in the brain-case, said TeaNutz® have not yet puzzled that paradox out. And probably never will.

I wanna share a little secret with ya. When you retire, even years and years after you retire? You will still smile a bit bigger when it’s Friday. It’s true. I swear it is. And late Sunday afternoon will find you feeling a bit let down. You will sigh as you see the sun go down. It happens. It’s just the way it is. And you can’t know that until it happens to you.

Mittens has an ad in Florida wherein he goes after Newt for claiming that “Spanish is the language of the ghetto.” While not factually completely true, Mittens, when asked, inquired, “Is that one of my ads? I haven’t seen it. I doubt that’s my ad.” Of course the ad ends with the statement “I’m Mitt Romney and I approve this message.” Which means, I guess he doesn’t, or didn’t, or it’s all meaningless. But then, well I guess we knew all that anyway.

Newtie Patootie invoked the name of Saul Alinsky again last night. It is supposed to raise all kinds of dangerous visions of commie boogeymen comin’ around to take away our freedoms. At least Newt is hoping it will. He, in his snooty, lookin’ down my nose at all of you, way of viewing the world, is assuming you have no clue who Alinsky is, and are way too lazy to find out.

What is rich of course, is that Saul Alinsky did most of his community organizing in Chicago, among poor working stiffs. And he did it with the full help and approval of the Roman Catholic Church, who joined him in his efforts to improve the lives of working folks. Oh, and Alinsky’s heroes? They were Jefferson and Madison, you know, the FOUNDING FATHERS, who are nigh on to gods to the Crazy Right.

Alinsky received the Pacem en Terris Peace and Freedom Award from the Vatican in 1969. Past recipients have been Martin Luther King, Jr., Desmond Tutu, Cesar Chavez, Daniel Berrigan, Jim Wallis, and Lech Walesa.

Oh Newt? That would be YOUR Catholic church no?

Why we are right:

Caterpillar posted record profits this year. To the tune of 36% after taxes. Revenues increased by 2.65 BILLION. Yet they have locked out workers at their Ontario plant in Canada, because the workers refused a cut in pay from $32/hr to $16.50/hr. Caterpillar CEO, John Oberhelman, made $10.5 million in 2010.

This is not class warfare. This is about fairness.

Okay, I’ll let you off easy today. It’s Friday, after all. No Football.

What’s on the Stove? Leftovers: Chick-Ling Spaghetti Parmesan or Wild and Wicked Taco Soup (your choice). The latter recipe will be posted today, the former already is.

Who Is Saul Alinsky & Why Is Newt Gingrich Yammering About Him? (themoderatevoice.com)
Newt Using The Saul Alinski Playbook (alan.com)
Gingrich: “I’m Going to Colonize the Moon” (weeklyworldnews.com)

Filed under: Corporate America, Economy, Election 2012, GOP, Human Biology, Humor, Medicine, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Psychology, Satire, Sociology, teabaggers, What's Up? Tagged: conservatives, corporate greed, Election 2012, IQ, medicine, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, racism, Saul Alinsky, science, teabaggers

Yawn Did I Miss Anything?

Sherry — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 17:24:11 +0000

Geesh, you guys should’a shut me up. You know I can talk on forever.

It doesn’t seem that I missed a lot. Same o’ same o’ as they say. The Mitt/Not Mitt heavyweight champeenship is still underway. It’s a slugfest.

Mitt has grown a pair of sorts by the last debate, but it’s still unclear whether he can sustain it. It’s a bit like a kid who finally lands a haymaker on the neighborhood bully, but then starts to shake himself silly when he gets into his bedroom and realizes, “whoa, now I’ve gone and done it.”

The Newt (I rewrite history EVERY day, let me do it for you) Gingrich is busy shorin’ up the breaches in the wall, pluggin’ the holes, and all-around changing the facts to suit his new best friends–old Floridians.

In the last debate it seems that Mittens landed a few. Newt, while not bloodied, was knocked back on his heels a bit. Of course, he’s blamed everything on the MSM. He moans to Fox Noise that he “probably should have complained when Bryan Williams asked the audience to withhold their applause during the debate so that more questions and responses could occur.” Such orders, Newt says, are “undemocratic” and suppress free speech.

Except that according to Chuck Todd of NBC, that statement has been made at EVERY debate by EVERY moderator. It just so happens that this crowd decided to actually listen rather than support “their candidate.” Newt undoubtedly does play off the audience well, and didn’t get that opportunity and so seeks to deflect blame somewhere else. (Part of the GOP mantra is always to blame somebody else, what’s new?)

One of the things that Republicans don’t like is protection of minorities (other than themselves of course). That’s why they don’t like programs that insure basic services to the poor. They would never agree that government’s basic duty is to ensure that every citizen has the basics of food, clothing, housing, education, health care, and a decent job. If you want people to be creative and bring forth their natural innovative spirit, why it seems to me, you have to get past struggling to eat each day. But the GOP thinks that the fit survive, and the rest, well, it would be most convenient if all of them could be housed in say North Dakota, where they could be put to some useful work, such as making license plates.

Why Chris Christie thinks voting is the way to get things changed. Majorities rule, and according to him, the civil rights movement was a waste of time; we should just have voted on it. No need to do all that messy marching and stuff. Which is all to say, he intends to veto any legislative passed marriage equality bill passed in his state. That’s the way to be “non-committal Chris, when you wanna run for the big house.

You can’t make this stuff up. As we struggle to re-invigorate an economy, Newty has just the ticket–a permanent settlement on the moon. Oh I forgot, Newt is campaigning in Florida. My bad. But I do have a suggestion for who might be its first permanent resident.

A blog you might check out is The Christian Left. I know, shocking to imagine such a thing, but we are out there! And they have a very good post on “the twenty most dangerous conservatives and their organizations”. I urge you to check it out. (h/t to The Fifth Column)

Oh, and did I mention that the above mentioned Fifth Column is a worthy blog? Yes, I know, too many blogs, not enough time, but it’s just ONE more, really.

I rely on websites like Politfacts to help me sort through the various statements made by politicians. It seems that I must learn to be more careful. There is a short, but informative article by Paul Krugman as to why Politfacts has been suspect as of late. It’s just not reporting the fact’s ma’am. And that is unfortunate. This is not the first time I’ve come across disputes about their accuracy unfortunately.

Which brings me to the point. Is it just me or was there a time when a politician being caught in a bold-faced lie would herald the end of a campaign? Today, it doesn’t even stop them from repeating it. In fact, they assume it’s hurting so they continue with vigor. I lay it down to the utter contempt politicians, in the main, have for the average citizen. They assume we wouldn’t know any better anyway, and that most of us won’t even hear of the truth. Cynical? Yes, but I am guilty of just that: cynicism.

Move over George Soros and Van Jones, there is a new villain in town: Saul Alinsky. Newty can’t stop from talking about him. He’s one of those dangerous and possibly commie community organizers. So I guess it is helpful to learn a bit about him. Wikipedia is always a good start to get a general look. So do so, if you are interested. By-the-by, those in the know, suggest that Newt is using the Alinsky playbook to the hilt, which is irony, which is lost on Newt, or would be explained away by Newt, but just saying everyone is wrong.

I’ll leave you with a his response as to whether he ever considered joining the Communist Party:

“Not at any time. I’ve never joined any organization—not even the ones I’ve organized myself. I prize my own independence too much. And philosophically, I could never accept any rigid dogma or ideology, whether it’s Christianity or Marxism. One of the most important things in life is what Judge Learned Hand described as ‘that ever-gnawing inner doubt as to whether you’re right.’ If you don’t have that, if you think you’ve got an inside track to absolute truth, you become doctrinaire, humorless and intellectually constipated. The greatest crimes in history have been perpetrated by such religious and political and racial fanatics, from the persecutions of the Inquisition on down to Communist purges and Nazi genocide.”

What’s on the Stove? Wild and Wacky Taco Soup! That recipe will be up in a couple of days.

Republican establishment REALLY doesn’t like Newt Gingrich (dailykos.com)
Newt Gingrich says he won’t agree to future debates unless audience can applaud his verbal stylings (dailykos.com)
Newt Gingrich: Had I Known Romney Owned Stock In Freddie Mac, I ‘Would’ve Had A Pretty Good Zinger’ (mediaite.com)

Filed under: Election 2012, Gay Rights, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Satire, What's Up? Tagged: Chris Christie, Election 2012, fact-checking, gay rights, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Saul Alinsky, wacko right

Creation of a Party Voting Bloc (Part III)

Sherry — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 16:23:54 +0000

For those of you who are gluttons for punishment, you may read Part I here, and Part II here.

We have been discussing how a core GOP party goes about defining and then co-opting a voting bloc. Such of course is necessary if the small core of rich white men are able to control the political reins of government, and thus set up the economic landscape that will enable them to continue to prosper, and indeed to grow in wealth.

We learned what kind of group would be most useful to the core, and then the means by which that core can be trained to believe and voice the desires of the core. This is done by many means, using sometimes their natural proclivities and at other times, it is injecting new “theology” into their world.

It would seem inevitable however, that sooner or later some members of the “target” will question the wisdom of what they are being told. This is so, because, in the end, the mantra of “hard work leads to financial success” will not happen for the vast majority of the target group.

When this happens, steps must be taken to both again, play upon the natural leanings of the target, but also to produce new theologies for them to grasp onto to explain and allay their fears that they are being “taken to the cleaners”.

Embracing the anger and re-directing it

As we note, at some point some members in the target group will realize that they are not getting the dreamed of reward, no matter how much effort they expend. They will begin to ask why.

It is important to respond quickly to this and with vigor. It should be realized that there are no shortage of explanation; creativity is called for.

The main object is to of course deflect anger at the core, and to point it at somebody else.

All effort must be made to make the target feel part of “us” and all others “them.” The “them” can ebb and flow as needed. For some of the target, fully all of “them” will be embraced but for others, it may be only one or two. The more of “them” you create, the better it will be.

It is not unwise to promote sectionalism, which has never been far from the hearts of some parts of the target’s heart. References are appropriate to recall things like secessionism, and the Confederacy in a light that is more favorable. Efforts can be made to challenge school texts that don’t give enough positive emphasis to the South, slavery, and the “good” aspects of both state’s rights, and anti-federalism.

An extremely important component of this is to “rewrite” history. Republicans are now the party of Lincoln, who freed the slaves, and you should remind the target that Martin Luther King, Jr., was a “Republican” after all. They are on the right side. They are not racists. “That” is all behind us. You may then go forward to attack most African-Americans as “playing the race card” and your target can criticize freely without feeling guilt. In fact the term African-American can be played as “unAmerican”. “Real Americans” are Americans.

Since your target audience is almost universally white, it is fine to attack other groups, be their Latino or Arab as part of the “other” and “them” as well. To the degree that, by culture or religion, these groups continue to exhibit “otherness” this plays to your advantage.

The upshot of all of this, is that the failure of your target to accomplish their individual economic goals is because of “them”. African-Americans deplete monies that could be used to create jobs by sucking on the government teat of welfare, food stamps, housing, health care and so forth. And of course, you must remind your target that their taxes (money from their pockets) goes towards support of this “assistance.”

The same can be said of Latinos who are “illegal” (criminal?) and “steal” jobs and use resources for “free.”

While it is true that Arabs, Muslim or Christian, have not historically carried this “baggage”, 9/11 changed all that. The core is most aware that the Arab world, does in fact interfere with their economic control of resources, and thus it is helpful that the target consider all Arabs as “suspect” and “jihadists” until proven otherwise.

At the same time, the Democrats should be portrayed as crazy “libtards” who are only interested in living off the government and pursuing “socialist” and “communist” agendas. Continually push that the target group is strong, independent, not afraid of hard work, and adult enough to care for themselves, and that it is “unAmerican” to be lazy and under the “nanny” state. To the degree that Democrats can be tied to secularism, all the better. Rail against the loss of our “moral compass” on issues of gay rights and women’s reproductive rights.

Above all, set a standard of “flag waving” and consider anyone who doesn’t adhere to obvious outward signs of “patriotism” as suspect. Like during the Vietnam war, “love it or leave it” is a useful motto.

Now beware what you have created

All might seem perfect now. And for a while it may continue in that vein. But beware:

You are leading a dog by a leash. That is fine as long as the dog is a chihuahua. But unfortunately, that is not always the case. Sometimes the dog is a Great Dane.

The dog is mad. Don’t ever forget that. Not just mad in terms of its view of the world, but mad as in “thoroughly fucking crazy,” because you have made him so. And mad dogs, have teeth, and well, I think you get the idea. A dog doesn’t know its dumb. It thinks its smart. Its gotten you to feed him, and house him for free hasn’t it?

So don’t be surprised if the dog has a mind of its own, and growls when you try to jerk him to your direction. He may just have a direction of his own. And you might be very very unhappy where that leads.

You have been warned.

Filed under: Editorials, GOP Tagged: Creation of a voting bloc, editorial, GOP

Creation of a Party Voting Bloc 101 (Part II

Sherry — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 15:17:36 +0000

Yesterday we discussed how a small core party goes about establishing a voting bloc sufficient to place it in power so it can accomplish its goals. Part I can be found here.

Essentially we argue the following: The GOP is a small core of rich white men who desire to rule in order to structure the political and economic world to enhance their ability to make money.

Since they are small in number, they need to enlist a voting bloc that will help get them elected. Yesterday we identified this selected bloc as people who are hard-working working class people with little or no interest in politics and who lack anything much beyond a basic high school education.

We recognized that the first goal was to establish that the rich were so by “natural” right and that all could be them if they would but put in the requisite effort.

To the degree that this group is religious, the Protestant Ethic is also useful in adding a “moral” component to this work hard philosophy. Remember, in the end, the wealthy require a work force to make their goods and execute their services, so it is imperative to support and heighten this “hard work” theology into the target group.

Concomitant with this, is a need to portray “free enterprise” as the key to everyone’s success. All manner of flag waving is useful here. America, that beacon to the world, is what it is, because of the unfettered freedom to bring new ideas to the market place and have them rise or fall on a strict supply-demand basis.

Innovators, no matter how poor, with good ideas, become the millionaires of tomorrow.

Such concepts are to be used in the most simplistic terms. You audience neither wants nor can be bothered to plumb the depths of economic theory. It is sufficient to define the economy as “free” and “democratic” and not “communist” or “socialist.”

American Exceptionalism is what made America great

This concept has both a religious and secular angle. The religious one is that America has been specially chosen by God to lead the world to the Kingdom of God. To the degree that your audience is Christian (and it overwhelmingly is), this should be stressed. America (and it’s systems) are favored by God, they have His blessing.

The secular aspect is simply that American’s position in the world today (as arguably the greatest power) is evidence that it’s system (economic) is the best and must be preserved. Therefore it is patriotic to support free enterprise.

Useful sycophants

All manner of con artists and experts of one sort or another are available. Their work, although sometimes seemingly tangential, can serve the cause and should be encouraged.

Pseudo-historians are particularly useful in rewriting history to emphasize a “Judeo-Christian” theme in the formation of the country. This serves to bolster both the economic system which is now defended as the “best” but also to help your target see that God too wants this too. Trickle down economics and anti unionism can be defended by creative “interpretations” of the bible and of Founding documents.

Recognize that those in science fields who do not find peer-recognition of their outlier views, can be used to advantage. Grants thrown in their direction will inevitably produce the “evidence” you need to prove that global warming isn’t real, that fracking is not destructive to the mantle and ground water systems, that off-shore drilling is not endangering to the seas, that over-fishing is not true, and that evolution is a hoax.

Even when the true science doesn’t reasonably affect rich men’s areas of concern, don’t underestimate the value of pampering your target with “evidence” that supports their pet beliefs. Since your target is religious and you have already found it useful to pander to their natural desire to be seduced to your “interpretations”, this is a fine time to give them a bone by supporting “intelligent design” or other such pseudo-theories. This allows the limited reasoning that you support them when it doesn’t “effect you.”

Word smiths are essential. Those trained in discovering what words and phrases play best can do incalculable service in getting you message across. Remember, your target isn’t paying much attention to begin with. So use simple slogans, use them constantly, and continually poll on what is working and what isn’t. It is essential that you convince your target that black is white and white is black. After all, you are asking them in the end to vote against their best interests.

Stress words like “freedom” “free markets” “Communism” “socialism” “secularism” “liberalism” “not like us” “God-given” “entitlements” “nanny state” “elites” “job creators” . Avoid words like equality, fairness, social anything, human rights, upper class, the rich and so forth.

Tomorrow: What to do about weakness, and questions of why not me?

Filed under: Editorials, GOP Tagged: Building a voting bloc, editorial, GOP

Creation of a Party Voting Bloc 101 (part 1)

Sherry — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 16:04:41 +0000

As the returns from South Carolina came in, and the result became oh so clear, a couple of points stuck out in my mind and caused me to redigest everything I have learned about the GOP. A party which seemingly is reeling with an internal schizophrenia, I am convinced, can be explained.

Today and tomorrow, I’ll lay out the formula I think is at work in the United States that explains how the Republican party has come to this point. Who are these people you ask? My answer is that they are divided into three distinct groups.

First let me say that what motivated my desire to set this down was this: polling determined that 73% of all South Carolinian GOP voters make under $100,000 per year. They are not the One percenters. Secondly, it was not Gingrich’s answer to the “did you ask your wife for an open marriage” that was the turning point in his rise in the polls.

Rather, Gingrich’s renewed surge in the polls was tied perfectly to what South Carolinian voters said again and again when asked (and might I add, the wording is most important):

“I knew Newt was the right guy when he put Juan Williams in his place.”

Now, to average Americans this statement could not be a more blatant expression of racism, yet it is said with a certain blasé righteousness that can only suggest that the speakers actually believe that it is both correct and not in the least bigoted.

These, then were my starting points.

At its core, the GOP is what it has been for more than a hundred years: the all-white, all male, club of big business, consisting of the wealthy elite of America

Certainly the GOP was one something quite different from this, as when Abraham Lincoln was its head. But it has been the champion of big business for more than a hundred years. If you search out old political cartoons of the 1890′s for instance, the same jokes would play as well today as then. Give us the money, and stop regulating us has been the continual mantra.

As with any established party, the vast majority of “members” are barely aware of what the party stands for

Most people are what they are by virtue of what their parents are or were, or where they work or live. Most folks are apolitical. What is going on in Congress or their state legislatures barely registers unless some issue that will impact them directly arises. Most people, if they were honest, wouldn’t see much difference in their lives between different administrations, and they are most likely to agree with the proposition that “both parties are pretty much the same.” They can say this whether they are happy or unhappy with the country at large.

The core, is by its nature very small.

There is a reason they are called the 1% after all. The corporate elite depends on a vast array of people who will both be workers and consumers, so by their nature they are small in number. And this creates the problem, and the basis of today’s post: how to get a significant bloc of voters to vote for us when for all intents and purposes, they have no economic reason to.

HOW TO BUILD A VOTING BASE 101:

Identify the characteristics that are essential to your plan

Choose a group that is not well-educated. You are aiming for high-school and/or trade school graduates only. You subjects must be largely incurious about current events, and know little more than the basics as it relates to world or national history. They should be hard-working, mostly from the working class (lower, middle, and upper), and spend most of their time trying to give themselves and their families a “better life.” They should not be “interested” in things political, either domestic or foreign. Religion can be useful.

Target the key places to intercept and inject new “theology”

Here you decide what traits to use to your advantage: education, religion, history, patriotism, engrained distrust of “federal” institutions. Once your demographics are determined you must decide how best to exploit them. A plan is devised to work on each separately, letting them mold together through the voting public into a coalesced “party bloc” (i.e “the moral majority, the Tea Party are examples)

Marrying your “new base” to the core

This is essential. Although your target is not you, they must relate to you, and think they can become you. There are two ways to do this: One is to press the Darwinian (don’t use that word though!) misappropriate of “survival of the fittest”. Ironically, this idea of social survival of the fittest was created in “elitist” eastern preppy colleges to explain the likes of Vanderbilt and the Rockefeller. This was considered the right and normal course of “evolution.”

Core Republicans now take this term and explain that being successful in business in “natural” and is the normal result of American superiority, and of course, unfettered capitalism (as they would define it). This is then married to the “Protestant Ethic” which calls upon all people to work hard as a Christian duty. The Core explains that hard work is what leads to survival of the fittest. Those who work hard succeed, those who don’t aren’t worthy of succeeding.

Tell lots of stories of how hard word has led various multimillionaires to their success. Press their “humble beginnings” and how they “pulled themselves up by the boot straps”. The point is, you’re trying to convince these working class people that they too, with hard work, can become you, the rich and elite.

Tomorrow: Part II (Grooming your new base to do your bidding)

Filed under: Editorials Tagged: GOP, teabaggers, Theology of a party

How Many Feet Can You Fit in One Mouth?

Sherry — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 15:45:31 +0000

Everybody is talking about what a week it was in South Carolina. I guess they are right.

The drop-outs, the lead changes, tax returns, open marriage, the dirty old media. Pick your poison.

I gotta admire Ricky S. He just stamps his feet, and says “what the freaky-deaky is wrong with you folks? I’m the only one who has NEVER flipped. I’ve remained the same gay hatin’, health-care hatin’ fool I’ always been. VOTE FOR ME DAMN IT.”

And Mittens is rattled, and finding new feet to stick in his mouth every day. “Dear, don’t I just have two? I spit out four last night when flossing.”

Yes, he really did say that the 99% were just envious of rich folks like him. Yes he did.

Mittens has continued to ”relate to common folks”. He’s told us:

that he’s unemployed too
that he’s worried about ~~giving~~ getting pink slips
that he’s not worried about the rich, but the “rest of us” are hurting
that releasing “multiple” tax returns would be a “gift” to the Democrats.

He does get it.

Can’t you see that?

Oh and he didn’t inherit a thing, he made all his money. Oh yeah, sure ya did Mittens, sure you did.

Meanwhile, the Newster has managed to turn philandering into an asset.

Millions of men relate.

Millions of women do too.

I suspect in rather different ways.

How dare the MSM report on his adulterous goings on?

I mean have they no shame?

Late at night, Newt’s phone rings. It’s Mittens and Ricky S. They want to know in detail just exactly he pulled it off. They take notes.

It all adds up to cheap cuts of meat.

Ricky and Dr. Paul can’t even get a cartoon unto themselves.

And polls today say that the GOP voter is more unhappy with the field of candidates than they were two month ago.

But in truth, this market never had a decent steak in it.

Ever.

It had a casserole, and a hot dog. You figure out who they were.

It had some really bad spam.

A good meatloaf would look good now.

Which all begs the question?

Does God really love Foreign usurpers of Socialist persuasion who praise Allah in secret?

Or is this dude just the luckiest dang fella you ever seen?

You gotta laugh.

You gotta giggle.

You gotta thank the Buddha, or Zeus, or your aunt Martha.

And hope that the circus keeps rolling along.

Rushy Limppaw and all the other GOP movers and shakers are grimacing and puffin’ wondering who has stolen their game?

They are tailing George Soros and all them other libtards.

No doubt they have been pullin’ some dirty tricks to make their gang of marionettes look so bad.

Muslim Brotherhood is no doubt to blame.

Or maybe it’s Putin and his commie buddies.

Or maybe it’s Michelle Obama and her sorority sisters.

Or maybe it’s those Frenchies or that woman Angela Merkle.

It could be those environmentalists and all their talk about CLEANLINESS.

And no doubt Hollywood figures prominently.

And then there are the gays and the Blacks, and the Browns, and the Jews, the Union members, the teachers, the firefighters and police. The college professors and all manner of elites.

All poised to screw over US: the rich white guys.

And the Tea Party member just says:

WELL DON’T LOOK AT ME!

And so it goes, as Kurt Vonnegut used to say.

So it goes.

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Satire, teabaggers, Uncategorized Tagged: Election 2012, GOP, Humor

It’s a Bit Like Me and Fennel

Sherry — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 16:09:12 +0000

You know what I mean. Say you’re like me.

You really don’t like fennel.

You know tons of people who do.

And it looks like a pretty and quite interesting veggie.

You try it.

You take a bite.

“Oh, no” your mouth says.

You take another to be fair.

“No, no this will never do,” you wince.

But you keep finding all kinds of recipes for fennel, and you see all kinds of others eating it and lauding its virtues.

So, you know, you try a new recipe. And you start to chew, and you tell yourself, “yeah, this is better,” and you chew, and you chew, and then you sigh, swallowing in one wrenching gulp. And you put down your fork. “I just don’t like it.”

Well folks this is Mittens in a nutshell.

After New Hampshire, Mittens seems all but assured.

And so, the strange beast that is a Republican, tried again. To like him, that is. They tried to rally ’round the flag boys.

But in the end, they just wanna spit him out. “I just don’t like it,” they moan.

And we have the first of the season, *RESURGE*.

Meanwhile we continue to learn more about the “average Republican voter.”

Let’s recap:

So far we have learned that Redumblicans don’t like gays (knew that), don’t like immigrants of the undocumented variety (knew that), like the death penalty (knew that), are pretty much okay with people dying in the streets before they will spend a tax dollar on universal health care (knew that), are 100% pro-life unless it has to do with the death penalty, dirty Muslims, or anyone else in the world who won’t give us what we want when we want it. (yeah, pretty much knew that too)

What we learned last night is that they are really in favor of all those “family values” except when it interfere with their desire to go with a candidate that solves their “anybody but Mitt” problem.

After all, “every man wants an open marriage” *har har* and wasn’t he just being a gentleman by asking, after all?

And then there is Newt’s reply which blames the “elitist” media for dredging up his *past*, which wasn’t really true anyway, cuz his friends say it wasn’t true, because they were present when he didn’t ask Marianne about letting Calista climb into their bed for some three-way action.

All of this was just gloriously cheered and clapped upon. And Mittens just stood there and looked sad since three-ways are much forbidden, even in polygamy circles, and Ricky S just plain was sick at heart cuz he has forsworn all his fantasies of three-ways figuring such would never be sanctioned by the AmerOKAY he knew. All in all, it was most enlightening, and led to many many a late night bedside chat in bedrooms across Merika, or at least the south where such things are outwardly frowned upon though practiced with great glee.

I am forced to conclude that there is something Mr. Mittens really really doesn’t want us to know about when it comes to the tax thing. Of course the 2011 returns, (which are still being compiled we are told) will be dressed up as best as can be, to bring Mittens up to at least 15%.

The reason that he doesn’t want to produce others is, because of course, he was way way below 15% regularly.

More interesting, or at least as interesting, will be his explanation of why having his money in “off shore” accounts has zero to do with avoiding taxes and everything to do with letting his money breathe in the nice ocean breezes.

The reason that there is really really something to find there, is his statement this morning to Gretchen Carlson of Fox Noise. Mittens, put foot to mouth once again and said that multiple releases would not be forthcoming because he didn’t want to give the Democrats a “big present” . Which of course means that there are lots of surprises in that box. Good luck with the stonewall there Mittens.

You thought, in your generous mind, that well, to be fair, most Republicans were only slightly crazy. I mean, you couldn’t just tell one by lookin’ at them. They belonged to the PTA, and bought Coke instead of Pepsi, and watched football on Sunday. They just were a little bit shriveled up when it came to compassion. Not a lot, just a little. And their brains were otherwise intact.

But, this is the kind of silly stuff that makes the GOP e-mail circuit. So, you know, they ARE CRAZY AS BATSHIT:

Thanks to Juanita Jean’s for this one.

And if you really want to hear what Denise thinks at Pass the Doucheys, and you really DO want to here, then go here and read her ~~analysis~~ rant about the Newster and his “morals”.

Looking for something a bit tamer but still riotously funny? Helen and Margaret serve up views on the current political climate.

The NYTimes editorial points out the problems that come up when you make “morality” a part of your platform. It almost invariably comes back to bite ya.

Okay, so I make a lot of funnies, but if you really want to learn something, head to Woodgate’s Views. Today he is going to educate you on Clean Energy. So get your notebook ready to take notes. Quiz tomorrow.

What’s on the Stove? Ya have your choice between leftover favorites: Brandy’s Best Ribs and Brokeback Tacos Gringa Style. Leave a tip, the cook appreciates it.

Mittens and The Cayman Islands Tax Shelter (dvorak.org)
President Mittens? (redstateprogressive.com)

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Satire, teabaggers, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, GOP, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, right wing wackos

Well, She Still Won

Sherry — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 15:39:17 +0000

Bless her shriveled little pumper, masquerading as a heart, self. My girl has gone and tried again to make herself relevant.

We been waitin’ ever so long for her to tell us what end is up. We considered it to be dangerous to make an investment, move our funds, or even to decide what to eat tomorrow, awaitin’ the WORD.

We gathered our friends in hushed conversations, all pondering when and what she would ~~udder~~ speak.

The entire planet held it’s collective breath, and squeezed its ass cheeks tightly lest any air should escape.

We were frightened.

But then she opened those lips from on high, coated in Mooselini Mauve lip gloss to tell the back-ended folk of South Carolina (cream rises to the top up North), and let them know what they should do.

“Thou shalt pull the lever, x the box, or punch the circle that denotes the name of thy most blessed Newt.”

This is all because our Wasilla WhoaMAN has concluded that we need to investigate the possibly suspicious and mysterious Mr. Mittens a bit more. All cuz, well, we screwed up last time. As you remember.

“I would want this to continue — more debates, more vetting of candidates, because we know the mistake made in our country four years ago was having a candidate that was not vetted to the degree that he should have been, so that we know who his associations and his pals represented and what went into his thinking.”

Yes, you read that right. She opened her pie and spewed forth from her word garden those delightful words.

And the world farted, at last.

Don’t you feel better now?

All this time, I figured she go with Ricky P, bein’ kindred stupids ya know. (Oh woe is me, the Perryster is leaving the circus to return to work at the carnival that is called Texas again.)

And what’s more, returning to Sarah I mean, not even a week since it’s inception, and when we thought probably no one could ever win it, our Sarah wins “Newtspah “ of the week.

We knew ya had it in ya girl.

Congrats.

Meanwhile, back in the meadow.

The feline wars continued.

You were unaware?

Oh do let me fill you in.

We have a cat (actually 4 but only one figures in this story) by the name of Spencer. He is by my account the spawn of Beelzebub himself, satan in drag, hell-cat from the black lagoon, however you wish to say it: really, really a rotten cat!

Said pet, I use the term loosely, is around-ish 12, and frankly in the last year or so has slowed considerably, and might, in some small ways be considered a “good cat”. For instance he has learned to sit quietly upon one’s lap with only the barest pinching of his little toes to prevent them from sinking repeatedly into the flesh of your thigh.

But he does have his “moments” and one of them is the need to wait until everyone has put head to pillow and settled in for a long winter’s nap, before he scratches at the bedroom door, announcing that it is now time for his meadow walk-about. This happens every night.

Now you might suggest that we try a few tricks: Ignore him (how long exactly does it take for hell to freeze over?), throw things at him (he ducks well) spray him with water (he’s learned the technique of scratch and run).

So I, (the Contrarian feigning sleep) rolled over, pulling myself from the transitional level of half-sleeping paradise, and hauled my butt to the front door.

As I open the door, Calvin leaps out. This is part of the “plan”. Calvin is not rude in this way and leaves this bit of dirty work to Spencer, but he is always goes out first. Now, Spence, instead of following suit, has put toe-pad to air, and realized that it is one bitchingly cold night and he is not putting his skinny black ass out there.

With this change of mind, he skidaddles into the kitchen and under the table, grinning not at all like the Cheshire Cat, but in an evil clownish improvisation all his own.

Oh, no. No ya don’t buddy. You got me up. You, my scrawny black and white hell-cat, are going forth to meet the zero degree.

And so I get the broom and he runs diving into the bedroom and under the bed.

So, I sit patiently in the living room, until he thinks it safe. And he comes forth, and when he sees me, he stops, and . . . makes the fatal mistake of running back into the kitchen. Whereupon, I shut the bedroom, cutting off that means of escape, and go forth with broom to do battle.

Meanwhile the Contrarian has come to help, and he blocks the kitchen door, and I chase the punk enemy into his arms. Out he goes!

As the door opens to throw him forth, the Calvinator returns with a “by God’s it’s cold enough out there to freeze off my balls, if I had any,” and disappears until morning.

It is only three minutes before Spencer commences to scratch at the door.

The Contrarian starts forth, but I end that:

“He’s stayin’ out for thirty-minutes,” I command, with more shrill tones than are necessary but I’m on the edge of my sanity and well, no one should witness that.

“Thirty-minutes?” he whines worriedly.

“Yesssss, that cat only understands pain. He’ll think twice about doing this tomorrow night,” I spit forth through clenched teeth.

“Yeah, you clearly have him under your thumb” he sneers and goes off to bed.

I settle down with a glass of wine and a copy of MLK’s “Letter from a Birmingham Jail”. Every few minutes the scratching commences and lasts for a few minutes, followed by quiet, and listening, and then a couple of mews, and then it starts all over again. I smile, and continue to read, sipping my wine, knowing that “I’m doing it for his own good” or words to that effect.

At the thirty minute mark, I went and let the damn cat in. He crawled up and purred softly. “I feel your pain,” I whisper.

And that is how it’s done.

That Darwin guy. He was on to something. I’m sure of it now.

Filed under: An Island in the Storm, Humor, Life in the Meadow, Sarah Palin Tagged: Cat humor, Humor, political humor, Sarah Palin, Sarah Palin humor

Sigh

Sherry — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 17:55:03 +0000

I had done a rather nice post folks. The people here at WordPress asked us to join in the protest against web piracy bills now before Congress. I complied to have a banner across the top of mine. I posted my blog for the day, it published, went to the proper page to show me the posting, and it came up, and then moments later, blinked and erased everything but the end picture and the two links. I don’t have time to rethink and repost it.

Sigh…

Filed under: Uncategorized

And Today’s Winner IS. . . .

Sherry — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 17:34:23 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

Palin: If I were from S.C., I’d back Newt (cbsnews.com)
Sarah Palin Was Disappointed In GOP Debate Bickering, Crowns Gingrich Winner (mediaite.com)

Filed under: An Island in the Storm, Humor, Life in the Meadow, Sarah Palin Tagged: Cat humor, Humor, Sarah Humor

Well, It’s Not as if They Want Those Votes!

Sherry — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 16:11:33 +0000

They have lots of time on their hands in Myrtle Beach I guess. Just so you know, from L-R, it’s Romney, Newt, Huntsman, Perry, Santorum and Paul.

While we were busy doing other things (getting totally immersed in the new show Alcatraz), the clown show was doing its level best to wow ‘em in South Carolina. True to form, when we miss a rare debate, we miss the best of them.

Juan Williams had the unmitigated (it’s always unmitigated by the by) gall to question Newtster as to whether his “little black boys becoming janitors” might be a bit, ya know, talking down to darker folks. For this he was roundly booed by the good citizens of drawl.

Similarly, we understand that Mr. Mittens made some remark about his Mexican heritage and for that he was also booed. That story is another of those, “you cannot make this stuff up” moments. When Mormons were being persecuted in the US, Mittens grandpa took the family down to Mexico, and they stayed there for some time, and Mittens papa was born down there. When the Mexican revolution broke out he moved the family back to the US–get this–as illegal aliens. Sooo, I’m thinkin, Mittens needs to go back to Mexico and get at the back of the line. Fair is fair after all.

While Mittens may be inevitable at this point, the right-wingers are intent on making it clearly known that they don’t want no Black and Hispanics muddying up their white GOP waters. I rather think their desire will be accommodated come next November. But, as the Rightie-Tightie’s are quick to point out, there ain’t no bleepin’ racism in Merika no more!

It used to be that the GOP could always make an issue out of crime. Crime being down everywhere, they have pretty much lost that issue, but both Frothy Mix and Mittens assured everyone that no dirty ex-felon would ever pull a lever in a voting booth if they had their druthers. So there.

Andrew Sullivan, who writes for the Daily Beast, has by all accounts a great article on the Obama Administration accomplishments to date in Newsweek. Given what he has had to work with, it’s actually pretty amazing. And remember that it was Obama that pushed the stimulus, which contrary to all GOP rhetoric has been successful. It has been Europe who refused his suggestions and opted for austerity, that finds itself in deeper and deeper trouble. While our economy is certainly not robust, it has been making a steady climb upward for more than ten straight months.

Now this is no gossip column, I want that to be perfectly clear. But good grief, how can one pass up juicy stuff like this:

It seems that Santorum’s wife, Karen, who is now a rabid anti-abortion crusader, used not to be well, so inclined.

It seems Karen, before she met the Rickster, was the “live-in” love for many years of one Tom Allen, a Pittsburg obstetrician, abortionist, and t0-this-day outspoken advocate of a woman’s reproductive freedom. He knows Karen quite well, having delivered her himself. Karen was into older men at the time. Karen was 22 when she remet Allen, then 63. Their affair lasted six years.

You cannot make this stuff up.

So, if you wonder how Frothy Mix gets all those perverted notions in his little noggin, well, . . .just sayin’.

This ranks high on the scale of Newtzpah!

I re-heard part of Martin Luther King, Jr’s Letter from a Birmingham Jail last night. I have to go read the entire thing. It is powerful stuff. MLK was an extraordinary and eloquent writer. You can go read it here.

Call me crazy, but I find articles like this intriguing. Do Sports Build Character or Damage It? The Chronicle of Higher Education weighs in, and makes for an entertaining and thoughtful piece. The comments are good too. This all from a professorial perspective. How else would Plato, Hector and Lawrence Taylor end up in the same place?

Betty White turns 90 today, and is busy, healthy, and funnier than hell. She gives me hope.

You guys probably don’t read the Blaze much. I don’t “read” it either, but I do check out the headlines and read the comments of one’s that I am sure will be “hot”. One of the most dangerous and compelling tools in the Blaze readership arsenal, is their willingness to “boycott” all those bad folks they find. Mostly they are Hollywood types and of course whole broadcasting networks, most of them in fact. They have boycotted so many people I can’t keep track. People like Morgan Freeman, and Spielberg, and Ron Howard, and George Clooney, and so forth.

The boycotts are because they are black and are “playing the racist” cards (code for reminding us of our damn bigotry), or they are supporting that racist/socialist/communist/fascist/Muslim jihadist/half-black/Merika-hatin’ Obummer dude.

I always feel sorta bad for ‘em. They got nothing to watch, nothin’ to read, nothin’ to do except fume. They are down to Rush and Glenn and WorldNewsDaily. Gotta be rough.

And I can tell that all those Hollywood types are sweating out these boycotts. I mean the must be losing pennies a month. Rough.

What’s on the Stove? Something called Smashed Tacos. And today’s posting will be an awesome Autumn Squash soup.

Extraordinary Words: Musings on the state and ethical behavior (suitably vague huh?)

Before Karen Met Rick (politicalwire.com)
Political Predictions (hidinginurcloset.wordpress.com)
Romney Shrugs Off Attacks (thedailybeast.com)
Video: Gingrich vs. Juan Williams on the “food-stamp president” (hotair.com)

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Psychology, racism, Rick Santorum, Satire, Sociology, Sports, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, Gingrich, Jr., Martin L. King, Obama, racism, right-wing insane, Romney, Santorum, Sports

Loving the Sound of Your Own Voice

Sherry — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 15:57:08 +0000

Long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I began my odyssey of blogging. Before you gasp and run for a knife to slash your wrists, no, I’m not abandoning you. And with that, you see the depth of my illness.

I am thoroughly enamored of my own voice. The statistics would rather dispute that by and large. I have enough visits a day to suggest I’m not talking to the mirror, but on the other hand, I am no Andrew Sullivan. With that knowledge firmly in hand, you would think a bit of humility might follow.

I have some folks who think me rather funny, and perhaps informative, and some who also consider me a friend, and as friends do, support my efforts.

When I started this business of blogging, I set up to offer everything under the sun. You could find a dining room centerpiece link next to one on evolutionary transitional fossil discoveries. You got recipes mixed in with railing at fundamentalists.

As time went forth, and so far time does seem to progress in a straight line (although one can argue quite successfully that it slows with increases in speed), it became apparent that it was just too much junk in one place. So we winnowed out most of the crafty stuff and the recipes for the most part, and we settled into politics and religion with a smattering of science as I was moved.

Little by little, the religion has faded, not so much by design, as by, well, a recognition that the more technical aspects have an increasingly smaller and smaller audience. And so Walking in the Shadows filled that void for me, and I didn’t care much that it has a rather miniscule following, since it’s really where I like to reflect on my faith as I see it.

I dabbled with a “humor” site but really never got it much off the ground and I’ve since incorporated the posts here, though I think about three are still in draft, having not yet been posted.

Perhaps because our move got adjourned until spring, and having time on my hands, I pondered how to make sense out of my burgeoning collection of recipes which I was always losing or misplacing, and causing me increasing consternation. So I decided to start a blog just to record my recipes which is What’s on the Stove? At about the same time, I saw a link for a great chocolate cake, and that led me to JustaPinch and with that, my recipe stuff took on a life of its own. WotS has garnered quite a following and I enjoy it immensely.

You’d think that would be enough.

I took time off from my book reviewing, mostly because I didn’t want books lost in transit. Since then, I’ve requested a couple, and realized that I did want to move off religion and into politics and such. And I realized that this site was a lousy place to deal with books in general. And then there are all these other ideas that pop into my mind and don’t fit this format here.

Which is all to say, I have another. Another? Blog, blog, I have another blog. It’s going to deal with my reading and writing and thinking. And I don’t expect to write daily there by any means. I want to do more than simply record a paragraph about the last book I read. And I have a goal of sorts: to read more classics, especially Americans, whom I have woefully ignored most of my life.

I’m also trying to read as many as I can online. And this site will give links to lots of great free book sites, as well as direct links to specific books I read, and well, my thoughts, which are way important to me, and may not be at all to you, but that’s the nature of the beast.

So, anyway, now you know what Extraordinary Words is all about, or I think it will be all about.

Which is way more time than I wanted to waste saying, but as I said, I’m in love with my own voice.

Meanwhile, Jon Huntsman is dropping out, and the GOP loses it’s best chance, in my humble opinion, to beat Barack Obama. That is a good thing.

And Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. It is a day meant for service to others. Do the best you can, but at least remember that the most powerful tool in changing our world, is peaceful resistance.

I came upon a blog that you should take a look at. It’s called Woodgate’s View. I think you might like it. He seems to think correctly. HA!

Got this from Juanita’s. She got it from somebody else: NEW WORD:

NEWTSPAH

Definition: (noun) To be so, so over the top you are a super dooper dooper hypocrite. So far, it’s unclear if anyone can top Newt and be accused of Newtspah except him.

I confess: We watched the Golden Globes. I make no apologies. Johnny Depp was the first presenter (BONUS) and I adore Ricky Gervais. So sue me.

This poem seemed cute, and funny:

So we’re two GOP primaries down

But don’t worry, don’t pout, snarl or frown

The fun won’t end soon

Still so much to lampoon

South Carolina, the circus’ in town!

Mitt, Newt, Ron, Rick one and Rick two

For today we bid Huntsman adieu

Who does God love more?

Well clearly no one who’s poor

At least that’s the creed of this crew

If God’s summoned each one to this calling

Did he just want to laugh at their brawling?

I may doubt that he’s real

But this atheist can feel

That if not, he’d find these guys appalling

Which one is the worst hypocrite?

Is it wetback-hiring Mitt?

Or thrice married Newt

Who really should have stayed mute

When Bill Clinton’s infidelity hit

I confess that I do miss Herman Cain

That was sure just a wacky campaign

But I don’t need to fret

Now it’s Mitt’s turn to sweat

As he tries to back pedal from Bain

So South Carolina as you go into vote

And decide on which of these fools to dote

Just remember this thought

Your vote’s really for naught

”Big Money”, that’s all she wrote!

by Sarah Firisen, through 3quarksdaily.

And on a final down-side, up-side:

The Green Bay Packers lost to the New York Giants (definite down-side)

The world was still here this morning (arguable up-side)

Jon Huntsman to Drop Out, Endorse “Panderer-in-Chief” Mitt Romney (reason.com)
Remembering Martin Luther King, Jr. (newwaysministryblog.wordpress.com)
Martin Luther King said … (converstations.com)

Filed under: Blog, Election 2012, Humor, Life in the Meadow, Poetry, Satire, Sports, What's Up? Tagged: blogging, Election 2012, new friends, Poetry, Sports, what's up?

Put Your Right Foot, Take Your Right Foot Out. . .

Sherry — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 17:02:04 +0000

: NOT ROMNEY

Well, our evangelical leaders are gathered in the great Lone Star (Lone Brain Cell) state of Texas to discuss the impending GOP nomination.

It’s not that they don’t like Romney, they just don’t like Romney, in that fuzzy way you like someone. They didn’t like McCain either, and look what happened there.

So they are gonna put their collective brain atoms (totally about 13) together and see if they can find their way out of this quandary. And it is one for sure, since all of the NOT ROMNEY’ers have proven themselves to be NOT POSSIBLE in one way or another.

Ricky P is just too damn dumb and no amount of ed-jew-ka-sun is gonna make a difference.

Ricky S has that google problem. Can’t allow them foreign digNAtaries to be laughing at our prez.

Newty is a grifter and will always sell out to the highest bidder.

Jon H? Why he’s a Democrat in Brooks’ Brothers.

Hmmm, what to do, what to do.

I could tell ‘em. I surely could. But that would be impolite. Seriously.

Newt is all up in Romney’s face these days.

He is finding it a bit hard to figure out just what side of this Bain business he should be on.

He’s quite used to saying today, the opposite of what he said yesterday.

He has that part down pat.

He’s just not sure what will play.

He’d like to fire people, if only he was rich enough. But he’s not.

He might be if he gets to be president. Will you help?

I have to confess.

When I see Ron Paul and his son Rand together, I can’t help but think that I’m witnessing evolution in reverse.

The apple does fall far from the tree. The apples, however, are both rotten.

Is it possible for two types of schizophrenia to exist in the same family?

I feel sorry for Ru Paul. He must get confused with that family a lot.

When some GOP voter says “I’m still undecided,” my first question is:

“How long were you in a coma?” I assume they have been ill.

My second question is: “Have you graduated grade school?”

My third question is: “Do you know who you are?”

I wonder a lot who the Veep candidate will be. If it’s someone who will make the candidate look good, well, boy are we gonna have to dig far down in that barrel.

Where is a good Dan Quayle when you need one.

It’s enough to make the more ardent of Republicans not really ”give a crap.”

I know, I know, that was a cheap shot.

Conservatives are humorless people I find.

They are constantly in the back room, erasing all the parts of the history books that don’t conform to their world view.

And underlying all the dirty parts of the bible.

And keeping a straight face when you shake your head no to climate change, evolution, and that Marcus Bachmann is straight.

And let’s face it, most comedians are liberal. The one’s who aren’t, well they aren’t funny. It’s especially hard to laugh at jokes that aren’t really funny. Ask Dubya, he’s had to do it to the face in the mirror for nigh on to 65 years, give or take.

John McCain announced that he’s finally solved the riddle of the Internet.

He’s going full steam, full-bore ahead.

His new website-blog is entitled: “I would have won, and Should have won, if I hadn’t let them talk me into picking that c**t as VEEP”.

Wife Cindy, was not amused. She felt somewhat better when she learned that this time, she was not the c**t he was talking about.

Meanwhile daughter Megan continues to embarrass herself as a R-E-POOR-TR. Can’t any of these people get real jobs any more?

Newt, on the other hand, knows it’s all about pacing yourself.

Being a good steward of the planet, he knows that cleaning his plate will lead to a cleaner America.

And so he does.

It don’t hurt to have a tape of “Girls Gone Wild” to go with the nachos either.

And a Bruski never hurt anyone.

Calista has helmet hair have you noticed? I mean real helmet hair. It sits on a table by itself, until she drops it on her head. Touch it, I dare ya. It won’t move.

Newt is already shopping around for a new model. The girls just can’t resist the Newster. For only a few hundred bucks a night, they assure him it’s true.

I have too much time on my hands.

Entirely too much. So I better go.

See ya.

Politico’s: The week in one-liners: Newt, Palin, Paul (kaystreet.wordpress.com)
Dan Quayle to Endorse Mitt Romney (inquisitr.com)
Why You Must NOT vote Romney (timothymichaellaw.com)
Obama’s new best friend (horsesass.org)

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum, Satire Tagged: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Politics

Step Back a Moment

Sherry — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 17:34:03 +0000

Hold on there dude, this is not a diatribe against men.

Just making a subtle point in a loud way. (Can you do that?)

We are wont, as people of the moment, to define all events given the world as it is, and as it seems to us reasonable, given our own knowledge and experiences. Which is nothing more than saying, we judge events from the facts which are most immediately at hand.

We don’t take the long view. Unless we are well versed in say, HISTORY, we often think that what we are experiencing is brand new and of first impression. And if we are versed in pseudo-history, we get even more confused.

However, after this many eons of human existence, there is really little that is new. Most is simply recycled problems from times past, cast in new garments.

So when we look about us and think that conservatives are the most idiotic of creatures ever to naturally occur by the arbitrary meeting of egg and sperm, well we are probably really really wrong.

There is a really excellent article at The Chronicle about this whole phenomenon. What is conservatism? What it seeks to protect on the surface is far from what drives it underneath. It is driven by fear that the “natural order” will be forever upturned. And this touches in the end, the most basic and personal of relationships.

It is an article well worth your time.

To be conservative, then, is to prefer the familiar to the unknown, to prefer the tried to the untried, fact to mystery, the actual to the possible, the limited to the unbounded, the near to the distant, the sufficient to the superabundant, the convenient to the perfect, present laughter to utopian bliss.

What this suggests, is that the conservative cannot enjoy the familiar and seek the unknown. Rather the unknown is a threat to the familiar, and must be opposed. Oddly enough, the opposition might well entail a type of radicalism that would be quite familiar to the left. If, the article argues, the OWS movement has real staying power, it might just force the conservatives of the day to that radicalism which does in the end, lead to real creative energy.

Oh goodie! *bounce* *bounce* The LeHaye’s (Tim writes all those Left Behind books that tell who will and will not be going to hell very soon) have decided to endorse the Newtster. And I can just hear God heaving a great sigh of relief. Or was he passing wind?

Obama wishes to consolidate a some government agencies. But our dearly beloved little guy Ricky P, well he wants to just shut ‘em all down. Remember when he forgot which three he would abolish? Those being Commerce, Education and Energy? Well now he changed them to Commerce, Energy and Interior. Or he got confused again. Does anyone care? As Juanita would say, bless his heart.

Mittens handlers are crying foul about Ricky’s and Newt’s lambasting their plastic doll over his Bain exploits. “Doin’ the Democrats work for ‘em” they squawk. Hey guys, you been doing my work for me for months. What’s new? I can write these posts in well under two hours, and that’s just trying the find the MOST outrageous crap you guys spew.

Walking it back just a bit.

About the video of Marines and the Afghan dead.

The Contrarian reminded me of one salient fact I had not considered.

How do you train a human being to degrade another human being enough to kill them, and still be enough human to honor the dead?

This is not an excuse, nor do I find what was done any less reprehensible. But we ask humans to do inhuman things. There are unintended consequences to that you may be sure. Just look at our suicide and homeless rates among veterans if you have any doubt.

I confess to remaining mostly dumbfounded by why regular old working types who for whatever reason think that tying their lunch pail to the GOP wagon will bring them the good life, are stonehead deaf when it comes to things that really shouldn’t impact their wallets.

I speak of science, and why the average TeaNutz®ian rusted iron anvil for a brain, Bud-guzzling, balogna-shoveling, NASCAR cheering, ass-crack showin’, gut-protruding, trailer-trash parkin’, person also disses climate change, basic economic theory, real history, and virtually anything else that smacks of empirical rationality. Evolution excepted. Evolutionary pushback seems utterly tied to one’s religious theories, the more literal one responds to the written sacred texts, the more adamant one is that evolution is a satanically offered hoax.

Well, those who study these things suggest that the response is largely visceral, and has little to do with logic, but rather is something that is the result of psychological forces that we are not particularly aware of. In other words, we are just wired that way.

That’s not particularly comforting is it?

Well, it’s off to leftovers and of course listening to my beloved talk non-stop about THE game, to be played sometime this weekend.

Sigh. I carry a heavy burden.

John Quiggin: Conservatives and Reactionaries (delong.typepad.com)
Emotions, Not Thoughts: (brothersjuddblog.com)

Filed under: Afghanistan, Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Islamophobia, Philosophy, Psychology, Satire, science, War/Military, What's Up? Tagged: conservativism, Election 2012, Islamophobia, Military, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, science, War

Who’s Your Daddy?

Sherry — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 17:04:39 +0000

Not exactly.

But ain’t they just the cutest?

New World monkeys are not, evolutionarily speaking our “ancestors”. We are related (having a common ancestor) with apes, which are not the same as monkeys.

Still, this study of facial characteristics is (wait for it, one of my favorite go-to words)—FASCINATING. It really is.

Scientists studied a whole range of features along with environments and lifestyles to determine what complexities of features has to do with social structure.

Initial results suggest that the larger the living group, the simpler the facial features. The plainer the features the easier it is to communicate via only facial expression.

Of course, humans are the epitome of that, having mostly hairless faces and ones devoid of differing coloration. A rich and varied set of features are apparently not needed for identification purposes.

However, when similar species live in close proximity, then features are more varied, helping to identify one’s own species from others to prevent cross-breeding.

Lesson: Beware of those bearded ones!

Aren’t you glad you stopped by now? Ya just never know what tickles my fancy do ya?

And what do beer drinkers and sports fanatics have in common with witches and occultists you ask?

It appears they are in dire straits if they do not change their ways.

So says some silly Right-Wingish doophus church.

I’m wondering if this should give Tim Tebow pause.

After all, Tim would tell us that God is quite the ummm, er, sports fanatic?

No, could that be?

No.

What I wonder are “fake Christians”. I guess we all have our theory about that don’t we?

I guess the only people who could define what “bodies dressed to attract lust” would be that “eyes that seek to lust.” Seems like this can be problematical. Thanks to Joe.My.God for the h/t.

If I’m not mistaken, Republicans like to tell us Democrats that it is they who understand business and money. They are usually trying to elbow us aside, and “take the reins” as it were. They smile condescendingly upon our poor efforts at ”running economies” since it is something born in the very sinews of their bodies. They are naturals at it.

Yes. Then please explain to my poor little lacking brain how this works?

Economic genius, Madam Governor, Jan Brewer decided that in order to make a few bucks in her cash-strapped state (due in part no doubt to all the business lost by her draconian immigration policies), she would sell off public buildings and then lease them back. She did that in 2012, and got 81 million. But now she is buying them back. And it’s only costing her 105 million. She explains that if she had paid all the leasing costs for 20 years, it would have “cost a lot more.

So there, GOP economics in a nutshell. That’s how you enable the job creators!

And that is your lesson #3 from Econ for Democratic Dummies, available at a Republican shyster bookstore near you. Thanks to Juanita Jean’s for this one.

I could not believe my ears. I really couldn’t. I mean isn’t there a self-preservation bone in everyone’s body somewhere?

Mittens was interviewed by Matt Lauer. He was asked about his campaign victory speech in New Hampshire. The “envy” one.

He was given a chance to explain that he didn’t mean it as it sounded.

Except he didn’t. He embraced it.

He said that all the griping about the rich is nothing but envy. Yep, we are just envious of the rich, and so we want to take away their money.

Mittens is just making this too easy for Obama.

And, Mittens is making it perfectly clear that there is something about him that is not quite right. He tends to let truth slip out when he goes unscripted, and his truth is not pretty.

Newt has gone rogue. We knew he would.

All the ultra-crazies are now telling Newt to back off, he’s doing the Dem’s job. And he is.

And the more they pile on, the more petulant he will become, and the more he will slash and burn.

We knew ya would dear Newty, we knew ya would.

Is it just me, or does Ricky P sound like a 6th grader, and a not very bright one at that, every time he opens his mouth now? He simply mumbles some inanities, having little to do with anything rational.

Like Mittens, he is prone to look around after making any pronouncement, for acknowledgement that he has said “the right thing.” Did I say it right? Did ya like it? Shall I wiggle my butt? I can tap dance if you would prefer? Will you vote for me? Please? Oh pretty please?

It’s just too sad.

I’m afraid by the time this little campaign of his is over, he will need help finding his way home. He just looks lost most of the time.

I am outraged at the UTube video of US Marines urinating on dead Afghans.

I am outraged.

It makes me weep with shame.

Hey. We got some snow.

Not much. A couple of inches.

Temps are moving up in a couple of days, so it will mostly melt I suspect.

No global warming here.

Move on.

No matter what happens, the Professor wins the grift… (balloon-juice.com)
Systems of facial features help monkeys figure out who’s who (mnn.com)

Filed under: Economy, Election 2012, Evolution, fundamentalism, GOP, Humor, Islamophobia, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, Satire, What's Up? Tagged: Arizona, crazy religious right, Election 2012, evolution, GOP economics, Islamophobia, Mitt Romney

Time to Make My Mark!

Sherry — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 16:00:41 +0000

I hate to tell you this, but I’m approaching 62.

Frightening, I know.

One wants, or at least I think one wants to leave some sort of legacy in the world. It may be as mothers, or wives, or corporate raiders, but we want something.

I came to the conclusion that for some people, the only avenue for that is eccentricity.

Not the type that comes from a Madonna or Lady GaGa. That is an eccentricity molded to build a career upon. Nothing wrong with it, but different.

There is the type that is simply inborn–the six-year-old who is determined to wear the most outlandish of wardrobes as a statement of independence from the herd. This is life-long and extends to an outlook that is askew in every respect upon the world at large.

No, I’m talking about the “I’m gettin’ old and I want to be noticed” kinda eccentricity. It is the eccentricity that results in a yard full of “lawn ornaments” of every size and shape. It causes one to paint one’s house with polkadots, or drive a scooter at age 80. It causes people to wonder, “has she tipped” or is she just being eccentric? And the trick is, you never let them get the answer. You smile, you wink, you whistle, and you move on.

Trouble is, I now live in a place where eccentricity is pretty much taken as the norm. There are plenty of examples around Troy. When too many are eccentric, well, they are NORMAL. And that defeats the entire purpose.

Problem too, is I don’t have any idea of what to do to be eccentric. I could collect salt and pepper shakers, but heck, nobody would know. I could engage in expert bird and animal mimicry, but who would hear? I could wear nothing but things I knit, but, whoa, I think that has already been done by Carla at the Dam Bar up town. I’m stymied, you see.

How to make my mark in New Mexico? How to stand out from the crowd and be recognized as a true “free spirit”. See, that is what I yearn for. To be the person everyone wishes they had the guts to be if they had the time.

If you have any suggestions, and you guys seldom do, I’d appreciate it. I’m collecting bird feathers. I have a lot of them. Well, not a lot, lot, but a lot if you don’t have ANY. I have a lot then. Can I do something with them that would be eccentric? Quick. Set me on my path before senility sets in and I’m eccentric without realizing it. That would be unfortunate, and defeat the purpose. Do you see? Or am I being eccentric?

I think the GOP race has now reached it nadir. It is a huge bore now. They slog on, and the same rhetoric, the same crap will be resurrected in the state of South Carolina. *Yawn*. For a political blogger, like moi, this is not good news. Or am I being eccentric?

I suppose I could write short stories and write them intentionally badly. Would I know I was writing them so? Or do I write badly and think I don’t, now? It can get quite confusing in my head at times. It may be that I am on to something. Or am I being eccentric?

One of the drawbacks to having the ability to record television for later watching, is that in February I’m still watching Jared ads for Christmas chocolate diamonds. God they are awful aren’t they? And those Target girls romping in fake snow with their perky little mittens. An innovation in recording would be to do it minus the ads. But then, sigh, an hour, would be 52 minutes, and 30 would be 22, and how can one order one’s life without strict adherence to 30 and 60 minute segments. I mean all of life is rationed this way. It would be too bold. Or am I being eccentric?

If you have nothing much to think about today:

“they” does not agree with a singular, gender-neutral referent by the single feature of number, “he” also does not agree with its singular, gender-neutral referent by the single feature of gender.”

Got that? Well it refers to the statement:

I saw someone, but I don’t think they saw me.”

Up until about 200 years ago, they was correct, even though someone is singular. But it was changed to “he” and is now claimed to be generic which it is not. It’s he. So should we change back? I actually think I’m being a bit eccentric here, now.

When is redistribution good?

As the New York Times points out.

The OWS says that we are sick and tired of the 1% redistributing all wealth only to the top.

The 1% calls this a call for “redistributing wealth”.

Or is it merely returning it to the lawful owners?

Surely, I’m being eccentric now.

Maureen Dowd has a rather fun little piece about our Mittens. And there is no eccentricity about that at all.

Eccentricity, Mathematics, and Peculiar People (siremethmimetes.wordpress.com)
Creativity and the eccentric mind (writeyoufools.wordpress.com)
New Anti-Romney Video Attacks Bain Capital Work [video link] (tribuneofthepeople.wordpress.com)
Obama adviser: Voters have trouble trusting Romney (sfgate.com)

Filed under: Advertizing, Election 2012, Entertainment, Humor, Life in the Meadow, LifeStyle, Mitt Romney, Satire, What's Up? Tagged: advertising, Election 2012, Entertainment, life in the meadow, lifestyle, Madison Avenue, Mitt Romney, Occupy Wall Street, Politics, Women's issues

Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut, Sometimes You Don’t

Sherry — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 17:08:14 +0000

New Hampshirites go to the polls today to determine which flav of the week they are hungry for. Ask them next week, and they might well change their mind. For folks who are in love with “things as they are/were/always have been” GOP voters these days sure seem uncertain of little else but what state they reside in.

We are tempted to spend some time in the kitchen making snacks so we can sit noshing as the returns come forth. Will it be another nail-biter like Iowa? Will Santorum’s Google problem catch up with the staid Catholic prude? Will Newt sit in the middle of the street in diapers and bawl his head off? Or will Mittens try rap as a means to communicate with the masses?

I guess my biggest question is whether or not Newt gets it. Has it dawned on Pillsbury DB that he is dead in the water? Is he simply engaged in a Shermanesque slash and burn campaign to destroy the man he thinks took him down? He is doing the Democrats work for them, and of course that is great. Can the Establishment GOP rein him in other than by assassination at this point? lets

My second question is whether Jon Huntsman is just getting his name out there in anticipation of 2016, or is he angling for the Establishment to turn his way now that Romney is starting to flounder a bit?

What is clear is that there is now an answer to why Romney avoided interviews and other unscripted situations up until he was forced to it by Newt’s surge. He is a bit undisciplined. Not a bit. A lot. He comes off in debates as childish and as some teacher’s pet sorta brat when he doesn’t get his way. He also let’s go with stupid crap like: “I’m running for President, for God’s sake!”, “I like to fire people,” “I’m proud I forced him to take a mortgage out on his house to beat me,” and other assorted gems that prove that rich people like me live by way different rules than you.

Me thinks that Santorum’s moment in the sun was just that, a moment. Odds are that second place is gonna be a fight between Dr. Paul and Huntsman. His homophobic theocratic crap will play much better in South Carolina. Too bad DeMint don’t like him. He could do well there, but probably won’t. Newt is pinning his hopes there as is Ricky P. You remember Ricky P don’t ha?

♦

I must say, I do try to understand those folks who hold opinions that I find utterly mad. I do. I try to figure out what set of basics one starts with, from which one can build a house of cards that lead to whatever cockamamie conclusion that I am scratching my head about. There is an interesting article over at Religious Dispatches about how and why the likes of Santorum and others come to their weird explanations as to why marriage equality is so dangerous to life on Mars. Well thought out and well written.

♦

Just a question. How are the climate nay-sayers explaining this winter? I haven’t heard a peep out of them. Usually about this time of year one hears the stupid “yeah, it’s 15 below and we have three feet of snow in Virginia–so much for global warming!” Strangely they aren’t explaining this nation wide warmth and lack of snow. Hmmmm.

♦

The Right, including the GOP panderers are always hot to trot when it comes to sabre rattling against “Islamic Jihadists”. And of course it sets a tone that is anything but helpful. There is a really nice article by Anouar Majid at Informed Comment about the Arab Spring, and the opportunities to forge a better relationship between Americans and Muslims. Do read.

♦

You may have missed this. Here in Iowa, they broke into regular programming to give the news. Todd Palin has endorsed Newt Gingrich. Along with Christine O’Donnell opting for Mittens, I can’t wait for who Ronald McDonald is gonna choose. I mean, ~~millions~~ four people want to know.

♦

This just in. The Blaze has gained access to the pictures, and they are up in arms. I mean, the inhumanity of it all. Exclusive here, you can see the photos of the extravaganza that taxpayers were forced to pay. The Obama’s had a Halloween party in 2009, replete with costumes and the usual riffraff from Hollywood, including JOHNNY DEPP dressed as the Mad Hatter. Register your anger now.

♦

What’s on the Stove? Well, we got the taste for a Reuben sandwich so I got some corned beef, some sauerkraut, some high-grade Emanthaler swiss cheese, so rye bread, and of course some homemade thousand island dressing (which will be posted today). Weep on my dears.

Gingrich Picks Up A Palin Endorsement (huffingtonpost.com)
Palin: Todd Endorses Newt Gringrich (sarahpalinblog.typepad.com)
GOP New Hampshire Primary Prediction (carsonjfbruno.wordpress.com)
New Hampshire reveals a deeper Republican divide (newstatesman.com)
No honor among thieves. Wing-nuts defend Romney when it comes to job destruction. (preaprez.wordpress.com)

Filed under: Barack Obama, Election 2012, Environment, Gay Rights, Humor, Islamophobia, meteorology, Muslim, Rick Santorum, Satire, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, gay rights, global warming, meteorology, Muslims, What's Up? politics

I Believe and I Predict. . . .

Sherry — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 17:29:26 +0000

Contrary to popular belief, or at least the belief of some, God does not take Sunday off. No, like many of us, He watches NFL football. This should come as no surprise actually, nor that he keeps a close eye on the movie and music award shows as well. We can tell this by how many times His name is invoked in thanks for whatever has been won by some otherwise quite normal mortal.

Now I have stayed way clear of the Tim Tebow controversy and his propensity to pray in public and give thanks for every win the Denver Broncos has been able to manage this year. Given that Tebow is often called a “less than adequate” quarterback, it is easy to presume that God has lent a helping hand from time to time. Of course, what God giveth, God taketh away too, and Tebow and his team have faced a number of losses in the closing weeks of the season. All the more to strengthen his faith no doubt.

Well, if you were watching yesterday, then no doubt you were not surprised that it looked a bit grim toward the end of the game as the Pittsburg Steelers pulled even and seemed to all to have the bulk of the momentum going into the overtime.

To what to our wondering eyes did appear then, but the miracle of all miracles, as the Tebow threw one of his only passes to connect to a receiver on the fly, and fly indeed he did, down the field and across the line to end the overtime in a new NFL record time, of mere seconds.

I, of course did not realize immediately what had happened.

But I do now.

God did not tell me who was going to be President, as he did old fart Pat Robertson, but he has given me a message.

You see, our Timster here, likes to paint various bible passages under his eyes. He has several, but of course, one of his favorites is the good old John 3:16. You remember:

“For this is how God loved the world: he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but may have eternal life.”

Now, that is not so remarkable, except that a man, not known for his passing finesse, managed IN THE LAST PLAY OF THE GAME to pass for EXACTLY enough yardage that his total for the DAY was 316 yards. Yes, you heard me. 3:16.

And so, I now know that the Mayans were wrong. The 316th day of the year is November 11. So that is the day that the world will end. Or it will be March 16. One of the two. Prepare! Send me all your money and deeds to your homes, you won’t need it. I won’t either, but just want to roll in the money for a while until the end. Trust me.

Oh, and Troy Polamalu, just keep looking so cute. See ya in the clouds! Sorry that Samson thing didn’t impress the Boss.

♦

Did ya see the debates? Nothing much to see; it was pretty much a bust I thought. Newty barely got warmed up. But Huntsman may be gaining a bit. New Hampshirites like to play it close to the vest.

♦

This last arrived in my e-mail via Facebook a few days ago. The only author I can discern is “Alan Showers”. But I thought it quite amusing, so I thought you might enjoy it too.

“The infamous “ISM’s” & so many other misconceptions….

SOCIALISM- You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM- You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk. FASCISM- You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM- You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM- You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

CAPITALISM- You have two …cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies.You sell them and invest the proceeds with Bernie Madoff.

SURREALISM- You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION- You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

VENTURE CAPITALISM- You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.
added by Steven Mantz:
GLOBALISM – you have two cows. you send them both to china. when your neighbors complain that they need cows, you say that sending cows overseas and depriving the USA of cows will force Americans to innovate and to come up with alternatives to cows.
LIBERALISM – You have two cows. you milk them. the state asks you to give some milk to your poor neighbors’ children so they can do well in school. you comply. 25 years later, your farm has new roads and electricity, and your neighbors’ children have cows of their own.
NORTHEASTERN CONSERVATISM. you have two cows. you milk them. the state asks you to give some milk to your poor neighbors’ children so they can do well in school. you comply. 25 years later, your farm has new roads and electricity, and your neighbors’ children have cows of their own. you talk to your friends about how to keep all these new people with cows from joining the country club for people whose families have owned cows for generations.
FOX NEWS CONSERVATISM – you have two cows. you milk them. the states asks you to give some milk to some poor neighbors’ children. you run a six-week expose on how the state is asking for milk as a conspiracy to register all citizens. the neighbor’s children protest against the plan to give them milk.
TEA PARTY CONSERVATISM- your neighbor has two cows. he milks them, throws away the milk and goes bankrupt. he asks for $20 billion. the state gives it to him, then asks him to give some milk to poor children. you instantly get all your neighbors to protest against the state’s plan to destroy all personal liberties. eventually, your neighbor keeps all the milk and sends the cows away. you blame the government.
BARACK OBAMA – you have two cows. you’re the President of the United States of America. you get a letter requesting milk for poor children. you milk the cows and carry the pail up the road with your own two hands. meanwhile, your neighbors threaten to block the road and to tear down the wooden drawbridge unless you agree to stop your efforts. you wait until your neighbors recess and leave for the holidays, then you carry that milk inch by inch by gosh to those kids. then you take a vacation in Hawaii.

This appears old, as I now see, but some of these related links are different I think. Anyway, have fun.

The world explained by TWO COWS (redpenofdoom.com)
‎A Cow based Economics Lesson (laughonline.wordpress.com)
Political Science For Dummies (politics.ie)
Defining Societies Via the Ownership of 2 Cows (gunnyg.wordpress.com)
Economics and Humour (vedamsgyan.wordpress.com)

Filed under: Election 2012, Humor, Satire, Sports, What's Up? Tagged: Football, Humor, Politics, What's Up

She’s Gonna Blow!!

Sherry — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 16:27:28 +0000

In truth, (and why would I lie), I have never aspired to be a vulcanologist.

No, not a studier of Vulcans, as in Mr. Spock and the planet Vulcan, where live a rather stiff and sober people who preceded Earthlings in all things civilized and learned the error of war and all negative emotions and so live with a tight ass all the time.

No, not them.

And before any of you otherwise anal types starts to send me a comment that I spelled it wrong, I didn’t. It can be spelled either with a U or an O. So there not-so-smarty pants.

No, I am not talking about other inhabited planets in the galaxy let alone the universe which leads to another whole dilemma of travel issues.

No.

I am talking about this kind of Volcanology:

Pretty huh?

Except.

Well.

I spend an inordinate amount of time worrying about Yellowstone.

It is what they call a “super volcano”.

Not a pretty one that just sends up plumbs of pretty fire and lovely play-doughy lava rolling slowly to the ocean. Such can be found in Hawaii, which is nothing but a bunch of volcanoes all in a line.

No Yellowstone is a monster.

It blew up, near as they can tell, about 600,000 years ago. They don’t have the science to determine the loop time, til the next time.

Hence, my dilemma and my worry.

It could go at any moment.

Well not quite any moment.

They have sensors all over the place and they’ll have some warning. A few hours maybe. Maybe more. It’s not very precise.

But when she goes, she’ll (volcanoes are girls) gonna take out a solid 2,000 square miles in one gulp.

I figure that means me.

Now, the scratch-your-head conundrum here is that old Yeller ain’t in the “ring of fire” or what is otherwise known as the “Pacific Rim” wherein most nasty volcanoes lie. (Which brings to mind that the Contrarian always thought that Johnny Cash’s song, “Ring of Fire” would be a fitting little ditty to accompany a Preparation H commercial. Think about it) Anyway, there is a reason for this. It is a super volcano and its neck stretches some 4,000 miles DOWN which means I guess that it connects with the CORE. None of which can be any good.

So I worry.

I hope you are now worrying too.

I hate to worry alone.

Oh, and the Bay of Naples has a similar gigantic underwater bulge of a super duper volcano too. So you guys can worry too.

Ahhh, I feel better somehow now.

Psst: PeaNuts® and other rightwing batshit crazies, continue to keep your useless heads in the sand. This was meant for rational people.

♦

And now just a skip down memory lane. Remember, nostalgia is best experienced within a few hours of the past.

I don’t know about you, but I been holding my breath, and have been exceedingly bored with the “new Newt”.

I love the old Newt.

The snarly belligerent windbag that is all too sure that he’s the smartest human on the planet. He’s my kinda guy.

I can still hear him after his meteoric rise in the polls, “It’s pretty clear that I’m going to be the nominee.”

Yeah, it was pretty clear. And then you kept on talking Newt, and well, we are back to square one. Please do make these last debates worthwhile. Give ‘em hell as only a petulant loser can.

So far, Santorum seems not to be making much headway in New Hampshire.

His pie hole seems obsessed with arguing about gay rights and “social issues” that New Hampshirites seem to reject as “none your business”.

This seems to happen to all my “not Mittens” candidates. They talk.

It ruins their poll numbers.

And it doesn’t appear that Ricky S is gonna do all that well in South Carolina, or North. I get them confused.

Ya see, him and Jimmy DeMint aren’t exactly friendly.

Which is why Ricky P may have stayed in the race.

Meanwhile, Michele (he is too straight) Bachmann retired from the fray.

Actually, she’s getting praise for that, being the only one who apparently can read her numbers. Unlike Ricky P, who just looks sad most of the time like a puppy who has lost his toy.

And did ya hear? Here is coming out AFTER the New Hampshire primary with his endorsement. But it’s gonna be a really different endorsement, so he says.

Perhaps he’s gonna endorse Sarah Palin and himself as VEEP. Oh, I mean Secretary of Defense. Sarah would be happy to do that. She still asks Black folk “does it wash off?”, there not being a lot of darker skinned people in Alaska ya know.

Speaking’ of which I read her last little “analysis” on Foxy Noise. She has a corner on word salad.

Hey, if I’m not mistaken the average sentence of any GOP mouth, mentions “where are the jobs” Obama? And are not these the same folks who when confronted with the OWS protesters, tell them to “go out and get a job!” ? I’m confused.

Maybe Mr. Trump can u confuse me. If he can find his way out of his hair.

What must it be like to be the offspring of such a douche?

See, thinking of things like that, makes your own life seem ever so much better.

Until you start thinking about Yellowstone, that is.

Santorum Asks for ‘Any Help’ from Palin (crooks and liars.com)
The Desperation of Little Ricky: Santorum Asks Palin for Help to Stay in the Clown Car (pamshouseblend.firedoglake.com)
Is a powerful sleeping volcano in Europe getting restless? (ctv.ca)

Filed under: An Island in the Storm, Election 2012, Geology, GOP, Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Satire, teabaggers Tagged: all the usual players, Election 2012, Humor, Politics

Miles to Go and Promises to Keep

Sherry — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 16:49:16 +0000

In a bold, and what a few would call a draconian move, the Alabama legislature has moved to create a new law in the state. While the upper house has yet to weigh in, it too, with it’s Republican majority, is expected to pass the bill as well. Governor Robert Bentley, who has publically endorsed the law, has indicated that he will sign it into effect immediately.

The law requires that every state hospital which serves as a birthing hospital, must obtain the written promise of parents to accept and use the package which has come to be known as “Growing up to be an American.” The law includes a proviso that those parents who refuse to sign will not be given their newborns, but the state social welfare authorities will be called in to assess the situation, and an investigation will ensue along the normal lines of claims of child endangerment.

The GA pack, as it has come to be known, includes a KJV bible, a copy the Federal Constitution and that of the state of Alabama, a copy of David Barton’s latest book, “Judeo-Christianity: Our Model of Americanism”, a copy of Lee Greenwood’s, I’m Proud to be an American, a biography of Ronald Reagan, a copy of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged, and complimentary free literature from “Kids for the GOP”. (audio tapes available for parents who cannot read).

Parents upon receipt of the packet, pledge that they will use this material to read to their baby at bedtime for the first eight years of life. An appropriate “test” is being formulated, whereby the kindergarten schools throughout the state can determine whether each child has received the appropriate teachings that will enable it to grow into a “good citizen.”

Democrats, predictably are up in arms over the proposed law, insisting that it is overtly favoring of the Republican point of view. Republicans respond with “tough tiddleywinks, we have the majority”.

Governor Bentley is non-plussed when questioned about the Constitutionality of the proposed law. Surely everyone agrees that our country was founded on Judeo-Christian principles, and surely the state has a right and duty to inculcate such knowledge into the minds of our miniature citizens-to-be. Asked if such a law didn’t violate 1st Amendment’s instruction not the support or promote any religion, Bentley argued that no such thing is intended here, since parents are free to supplement the packet with their own personal beliefs–as long as they promote “true Americanism” he smiled.

A sudden run on U-Hauls has been reported in the state.

¿¿¿

Okay.

So none of that actually happened.

But.

Grover Norquist has managed to get virtually every Republican elected to office to sigh his pledge not to raise taxes, and it appears that they must look to him for what is “raising taxes” and if they refuse, he orchestrates their being “primaried.”
Bob VanderPlaats, fool from Iowa managed to get most of the whacked out right GOP candidatry to sign his “Marriage and Family” vow. Meanwhile Romney, Santorum, Gingrich, Perry and the now defunct Bachmann, all signed the NOM pledge to root out gayism wherever it may be found.
In Virginia, prospective voters in the primary are required to sign a pledge that they will support the eventual candidate, even if it is a dead monkey.

The distrust continues even among legislators:

In the US House, no bill is supposed to be put forth that does not include from where in the Constitution is gains its birth. So far this has been largely ignored, as even the GOP can’t be bothered to think that hard.
In the latest of all funny ones, New Hampshire Republicans have offered out a bill that wouldn’t require reference to the US Constitution, but to Magna Carta, that first of all statement of democratic principles, enuciated in England. Yes, New Hampshire laws must identify from Magna Carta what freedom or liberty is being enhanced or defended in each and every piece of legislation pro-offered.

This last is as much of a joke as the Alabama scenario I painted. The “brainchild” (some would say fart) of three “we really have no life” Republicans, last summer, does not address the rather arcane language used in Magna Carta, which dealt, as you undoubtedly remember with a FEUDAL SYSTEM and a MONARCHY.

We wonder how and when such rules as:

“We shall straightway return the son of Llewelin and all the Welsh hostages,”

shall come into play. But we are ready with popcorn and soft drinks to watch them try.

Who said Iowa had a corner on crazy?

♦

Hint:

When Ricky Santorum responds to a “why aren’t gays entitled to the same rights as straights” with a “does that include marriages of three guys, or three gals?” the response is:

“Mr. Santorum, we are hear to discuss the actual realities of today, not the weird sexual groupings that your mind apparently dreams up.”

♦

Good news on the economy and on the jobs front just in. With months of good reports, and jobs totally over a million in the last year, Republicans are have flipped the dime from: “The sad state of our economy is all the fault of Obama and his awful economic policies”—to: “The economy appears to be rebounding IN SPITE OF Obama an his awful economic policies.” Gotta love how fast they can do that.

♦

Don’t miss the debates on Saturday night at 8 pm Central, on ABC, or Sunday morning at 9 Central on NBC. Will the Newt (Cassius) come with dagger in hand to do poor Caesar in? Will Santorum (Marc Antony) come to praise dead Caesar or only to bury him? Will Brutus (Huntsman) get cold feet? Will Shakespeare come to the rescue? Will Santorum be ordered to “get thee to a nunnery?” Is it all “Much Ado About Nothing?” Will Shylock demand a pound of flesh? Stay tuned.

An act requiring a reference to the Magna Carta on certain legislation (stiltsville.wordpress.com)
In Which Freshmen Republicans Invoke the Magna Carta (esquire.com)
New Hampshire has some world-class lunatics (freethoughtblogs.com)
New Hampshire GOP Has Gone Completely Off The Deep End (crooksandliars.com)

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Satire, teabaggers Tagged: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Teabagger maddness

Alien Ships Spotted Over Iowa

Sherry — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 16:49:07 +0000

We didn’t want to start a panic, but in the early hours of this morning, I mean just after midnight, citizens of Iowa were alerted to a grave danger. Dozens of UFOs were spotted over various parts of the state.

Now, we know that corn and hogs are highly important to the national economy, but upon checking, this phenomenon appeared to be local to our state.

As fighter jets scrambled to intercept, a strange thing was noticed. There appeared to be a pattern being established. Soon, it was all too apparent–the ships were joining up and heading in a northeasterly direction. Within minutes they had cleared Iowa air space and were no longer a threat.

We note that similar reports are now coming in from the state of New Hampshire, where, at least a few of the ships seem to be settling and preparing to land. We send our heart-felt condolences to New Hampshirites. Nothing good can come from this we opine.

♦

Well, we went and did it didn’t we? I mean how crazy is that? Mittens wins by eight big votes, and old prudish frothy mix is second, though everyone considers that he really won. Meanwhile the crotchety old man who just wants to sit on his porch and shoot bb’s at kids came in third. Newt came in a distant fourth, and Perry is heading home to Texas to “reassess”. Michele? Oh gosh the poor Mrs. Thatcher in drag, her lipstick smeared, and her mascara running in puddles around her cheeks, is preparing to throw in her high heels and declare it a day.

And we the fair citizens of I O WAY, are breathing free once more. Gone are all the candidates with their lying rhetoric and their sycophantic nodders. Gone are the pundits who spent hours saying the same basic thought 432 times, in 237 different ways. Gone are the trucks of cable and equipment, the cameras and microphones. Alas, not gone is Steve King, who gutless wonder that he is, remains, still claiming relevance in the state somehow. King you may have noticed didn’t have the guts of his convictions enough to even endorse his long-time Tea-Pal Michele, nor his other family-value bud, Ricky S. King is after all, out for King, and one must not step on the toes of a potential employer, i.e. candidate who might hand me a bigger job.

A pox on all their houses.

♦

Did you know that if there is a sexual misbehavior scandal, odds are that 2 out of 3 times, it will involve a Republican? I read that yesterday. Family values just leave a person with so much pent-up energy I guess.

♦

Buddy Roemer was running in the caucuses too. He is a rather likeable kinda guy. He was tweeting with a good sense of humor about his relative lack of “votes”. He was tweeted back something like this: “Hey Buddy, we are having a drinking party, and taking a shot with every vote you get. We are all still sober.” He got 31 votes. On the other hand, Jon Huntsman got 745, which proves that there are at least than many sane Republicans in Iowa. We’re most proud of that little factoid. Can you say as much?

♦

Meanwhile, Newty is pulling off the gloves. No more Mr. Nice Guy for him. Was there ever a Mr. Nice Guy Newt? He’s hoping to partner up with Ricky S. and stand around saying nasty things about Mittens. Newty is fun, and he doesn’t even try to be. Old tired boring and all-around mean old fart, John S. McCain is all set to endorse Mittens. *Yawn* Yeah, I know, who cares?

♦

These are the gems I live for. If you hadn’t heard, Mitt likes to quote from “America the Beautiful.” He sees it as somehow reflecting his vision of America. Trouble is the writer of that lovely hymn was an ardent feminist and lesbian who was railing against the Gilded Age. And she changed the third verse to what you know from the original:

America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till selfish gain no longer stain
The banner of the free!

Bet Mittens has no clue that he’s parodying himself.

♦

And because I really do love ya all bunches, please be advised that the wonderful humor of Margaret and Helen has returned with a post today. Don’t miss Helen’s take on the political landscape.

♦

See, this Santorum thing is not a bad thing. I know some think it is, but heck, we’ve just been ignoring him since he was utterly irrelevant. But he’s full of fun surprises when you check around a bit. This is like my first best quote he has uttered:

“One of the things I will talk about, that no president has talked about before, is I think the dangers of contraception in this country,” the former Pennsylvania senator explained. “It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”

“Do things” I like that. Ricky can’t bring himself to name these things, which he must really have to steel himself to “do.” This dude is seriously repressed. If you would like a list of some of his most fun quotes, go here.

Dear Lord, I do thank you for Republicans. They never stop giving material. It’s almost too much God, almost.

Romney squeaks out victory in Iowa (thegreatone22.wordpress.com)
The GOP Dodges a Bullet (treeofmamre.wordpress.com)

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Humor, Iowa, Michelle Backmann, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Satire, Steven King, teabaggers, What's Up? Tagged: Buddy Roemer, Election 2012, GOP, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, what's up? Iowa caucuses

Reports of My Insanity are Grossly Exaggerated

Sherry — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 16:38:00 +0000

I suppose if you’ve been reading along the past week or so, you might have concluded that I was going a bit wiggers. Losin’ the mind, not playing with a full deck any more, seeing aliens under my bed.

Naw, I’m fine. It seems a good thing to do every now and then–purging the evil from the grey matter. The better to serve you, my chickies. Just to prove that I still have some rational neurons zippin’ around the brain universe, I present you some find things you might well be interested in. If you are not, well, crap, there go my polls again.

First off is a really good piece by Frank Rich in the New York Magazine. Rich pretty much echos my sentiments when I’ve suggested that the tail the GOP establishment chose to grab hold of (the TeaNutz®) would one day turn around and show its fangs. Rich argues that the failure of Mittens to rise above 25% suggests that 75% of the GOP hates him and the Old Guard, and will, one way or the other take them down. Mittens may still be the candidate, but that doesn’t mean they will vote for him in the general election. Worth your reading.

♦

I know he’s no longer relevant, but gosh, I sure miss Herm. Herm was the king of the unqualifieds, of which the field is bloated this year, and he had a way about him. He actually thought that his self-confident affirmations would be enough to power him forward. Actually old Herm never thought he would actually be considered a real candidate, yet there he was, catapulted into first place suddenly. Then of course we found out that the emperor had no clothes. No thoughts either, and no knowledge.

You probably saw Barbara Walter’s famous “What?” when Herm said that he would like to be Secretary of Defense. Well, he wasn’t kidding and frankly, I think the soft-in-the-head shuckster really thinks someone would consider him for the post. The Daily Caller, that bastion of level-headedness (not), gives you Herm’s seven reasons why he should be SOD. They amount to:

He’s a proven leader (being the head of anything apparently proves this)
He’s not afraid of challenges (meaning he won’t go sit in the corner and pee on himself if something bad happens in the world.)
He can make decisions (yeah Dubya could too, just not good ones)
He knows how to prioritize (okay, I learned to count and put things in columns too Herm- by 2nd grade I believe)
He knows how to listen to experts (learned that in Kindergarten I believe)
He knows how to have strategic priorities (um see #4)
He knows how to give an opinion to the boss (as well the mail boy might be called upon to do)

Damn Herm, we miss ya.

♦

Many of you undoubtedly read Lisa Golden’s blog, That’s Why (on the bloglist). I do as well, and she had a great link that I thought you might really like to keep tucked in the favorites of your computer. It’s a long list of “free-education” sites, and other archived sites where you can look up just about anything, from learning a language to taking a math course, to looking up some obscure historical factoid.

You might generally like to bookmark the site itself which is Marc and Angel Hack Life. They had another post I liked called 30 books you should read before turn 30. I just love stuff like that. Seems like a good site to have in your back pocket.

♦

Well, what a difference a week makes. Ricky (oops that darned Google searchie thingie) Santorum is the flav of the week. He is surging as they all do, but he has capped it at the precisely right moment, and may well register a win or second place. Ricky, who exemplifies just about everything is wrong with the GOP, is proof positive that it’s still “anybody by Mitt” as far as the rank and file (which is way way right of the Old Guard) is concerned.

So for the brief moment while Santorum matters: this is why he things that social programs are so very wrong–he thinks its kinda Christian to suffer, and also, he thinks that recipients of “welfare” in whatever guise, become beholden (and must for vote for) those who offered them a hand. And of course, that can never be good for Republicans who are stingy mother-******’s as everyone knows.

♦

We are about to be released from Purgatory here in Iowa. Only hours away, the candidates will slink off to New Hampshire and drive those people batshit crazy for a few days. There is something very very bad about being first. These insufferable jackasses come and park their rears here and never leave. They are like the relative from hell who will not pack and go home. Nobody else has to suffer this kinda crap. What did we do to deserve this?

Inquiring minds wish to know.

We hear that the almost as irrelevant as Herm Cain, Michele Bachmann is touting herself as the American version of Margaret Thatcher. Well, we can sure say that she’s got half of the Iron Lady’s persona going for her. She’s batshit crazy. Now if she could just improve on her looks, she would do Mrs. Thatcher proud. Oh my bad. Shame on me. Wicked wicked woman. I should do penance. So I will. Promise.

Tootles there my fine friends. Ah, a new year, and still nary a flake of white caresses my porch.

Filed under: Election 2012, GOP, Herman Cain, Humor, Iowa, Life in the Meadow, LifeStyle, Michelle Backmann, Rick Santorum, Satire, teabaggers, What's Up? Tagged: Election 2012, free education, GOP, Herman Cain, Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum, teabaggers

New Year? I Demand a Do-Over!

Sherry — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 16:37:30 +0000

I don’t ask for much. I truly don’t.

I’m fully lodged in the 21^st century, unlike the Contrarian who often seems happier contemplating the 19^th. (You should hear his rant about “episodal ” TV and how Dallas ruined television forever) But I digress.

You see, I spent part of Saturday and early Sunday morning, which need I remind you was the first freakin’ day of the new year! What I mean to say is that I spent hours in the kitchen making “tasty treats” to sustain us through the Rose Parade and numerous holiday bowl games, such as the Rose Bowl, and the Sugar Bowl, and the Orange Bowl, and various other bowls that they no longer call by their right names because somebody sold out to corporate interests who thought it was a good idea to plaster their stupid name over traditions that have existed forever (as long as I been alive), and I will never be bothered to learn their stupid names anyway or buy their crap products.

Where was I?

Oh yeah, so I am making paté and a cheese ball (which I did not put in the shape of a ball at all and did not cover with walnuts cuz I think that is stupid and so 60’s), but I digress. And I made two, mind you, two varieties of chicken wings, one teriyaki-ish and the other Caribbean-ish. And then I made these things called pizza cups, which was not my creation, but I changed the recipe enough to declare it was really mine after all. And then, I ask a simple, a simple and ordinary question:

“Isn’t it about time for the Rose Parade to start?”

And do you have any clue what I got as an answer?

No?

Well I’ll tell ya.

“Rose Parade? I don’t know about that babe, the pre-game for the Packer game is coming on in five. Big game ya know? Well, not really big, big, cuz they are in the playoffs already, but big for the Little Brothers, I mean Lions.”

“Well I don’t care about the game, and certainly not the pregame, just find the Parade,” I merrily yodel to my beloved.

“No parade today sweets. No rose bowl either as far as I can see. Double header on today, lots of important games. “

“No Rose bowl? You gotta be insane! Well, you are insane; been there, established that. What about the other bowl games?”

I hear a long sigh, and the remote goes into action with its search element.

“Rose bowl is on tomorrow, and so is the parade.” he mewls in some apparent triumphantal aplomb. (like that fancy linguisitic erudition did ya?)

“TOMORROW!!!! Are you freakin’ nuts? TODAY is NEW YEARS, they Auld Lang Syne’d and all that crap last night. If it’s New Year’s in the daylight, it’s the Rose Bowl. “

“Nope, fraid not.” (I can HEAR his grin from the kitchen!)

“It’s SUNDAY! ” he shouts as if that is an explanation.

“So what? Who cares what day of the week it is. It’s January 1 and it’s Rose parade and Rose Bowl day. Do you think I made all this damn food just because it’s SUNDAY?”

“Hey don’t yell at me, I’m just the messenger!”

I hear a bit of a giggle.

“Well, I never<” I lamely start, and then fail to finish.

“Well I think that’s what they do when it’s Sunday,” he offers in apology.

“Never did it before,” I rant.

“Bet they did,” he mummers quietly, but with that swagger than only a wife can detect.

“Was wrong then, then.” I bellow. “ All this is the fault of stupid football and its becoming a year round thing. Should be off now. Stupid football.” (Oh Homer would be proud–not the Illiad guy, the Simpson one, doh!)

“Are those wings ready? I’m hungry!” says he who is indifferent to my misery.

So, just so we got everything else straight. Here is where we stand:

Herm Cain is still irrelevant
Perry is still dumber than a dust mite
Bachmann is still deluded into thinking she’s married to a straight guy.
Newt is still trying to find an angle to work.
Mittens is startin’ to believe his own bullcrap.
And Santorum? Poor thing, he thinks it’s his turn to fly. You will find him dead at the base of the tree. Ya need wings dipshit.

Oh, I now got a powerful rant building up sufficient to last the whole year. See I told ya, the GOP has polluted my air and I’m losing my mind. Get those jackasses out of my state! NOW!

So beware. Tread further with great care. This year is gonna be one long rant. As Capt’n Jack Sparrow would say: “I’m naming fingers and counting names!”

You have been warned.

And just so you know I mean it—Does this scare the crap out of you? Go rinse your eyes out now.

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Humor, Iowa, Life in the Meadow Tagged: Humor, Iowa, life in the meadow, New Years

If One More Person Says. . . .

Sherry — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 16:52:30 +0000

If one more person says:

If I had it to do all over again, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Well congratulations Mr. or Mrs. Perfect. So glad to know you never hurt anyone’s feelings, never took the wrong job, majored in the wrong discipline in college, married the wrong guy, bought the wrong gift, or failed to pay a bill on time. The rest of us wish we could have some do-overs on a whole pack of things in the hopes that with fore-knowledge we would be kinder, smarter, gentler, and a whole lot better person than we WERE.

Take heart, things could be worse.

Yes, they could be. I could be dead. Isn’t that the only real response to such a thoughtless and meaningless phrase. Meanwhile by saying it you feel “sympathetic” while at the same time you have wasted not one precious second of your miserable life truly empathizing with another human being. Congratulations, things could be worse buddy.

If only we could return to the good old days.

Yes, I guess that would be great, especially if you lost everything in the crash of 29, or you were a Jew in Warsaw during WWII, or a grunt in a rice paddy in Vietnam, or had an office in the WTC on 9/11, or were a black person living in Montgomery in the late 50′s, or a woman wanting to be a doctor in the 1940′s. Let me remind you of the good old days of polio, and living in London during the Blitz, and going to back alley abortionists because you felt you had no other option. Let’s get back to life in the Gulags in Russia and by all means remember the slave trade and all those lovely ships that free of charge brought blacks on vacation to America! Get your damn head out of your ass.

I would rather dig ditches for a living than ask for welfare!

The point is you have never been in that position. You were born, most likely male and white in a land that holds neither your gender nor color as an obstacle to be overcome. Your parents might have been poor, but that was when bread cost a nickel and everybody in the whole neighborhood was poor, and nobody knew they were. You have never been systematically denied anything simply because you don’t fit some model of what such a person should look like. You grew up in a world where unions kept wages high and benefits became a right, not a luxury. You grew up where sweat shops were regulated, and kids didn’t work twelve-hour days. You had a real floor under your feet, and a real roof. Shaddup. What you really mean is that you have yours now, and don’t want to pay to help anyone else who is caught in this economic hell we now exist in. You are between the ages of 35-65 white and male and YOU feel discriminated against. Yeah, you sure are.

If you live in America, speak English, ditch the head-gear, and act American.

You point out in perfect detail just how lousy our free education has become in this country. Did you learn nothing in history at all? We are a nation of immigrants and each has brought their ethnic life with them. Many cities have ethnic days throughout the summer and celebrate Polish Days, and Armenian Days, and Irish Days, and Italian Days. These were fine with you. And guess what? Those folks actually eat ethnic meals and continue a whole plethora of ethnic morays in their lives here. They actually sometimes live in enclaves where most of them are from the same country. But you now get stinkin’ crazy when Arabs and Latinos want to do the same regarding their native lands. Could it be that something else is at work here buddy? Like your ready to bursting racism? See the paragraph above for further elucidation.

America: Love it or Leave it.

Been there, done that. We went through all this during the Vietnam War era. It was somehow unpatriotic to object to the war as being–get this–IMMORAL. All this stupid phrase really means as far as you are concerned, is that you have some corner on what America is supposed to be, and want anyone who disagrees to shut up and disappear. So you call them unpatriotic. You have defined most Democrats as such, and certainly all liberals and progressives. “Libtards” you call them. Calling people Commies because they don’t agree with your personal desires of how life should be led in America simply reflects your lack of knowledge. How do you think the Revolution got started? I guess the English would have called them “libtards”–Adams and Franklin and those guys. Wise up stupid.

When you get to be my age you’ll agree with me.

That’s about half right and half wrong. If you mean that I will become protective of what I have and not want to share. . .then not so much. If you mean, I will have learned from my mistakes, and see the world in a broader focus, and realize that we are all in this together. . .then that’s probably true. People do not all become conservatives as they grow older, sometimes they become smarter liberals. If your principles are real, then they don’t change, they simple become better articulated.

HAVE A WONDERFUL AND SAFE NEW YEAR’S EVE AND DAY!!!!

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Humor, Iowa, Life in the Meadow Tagged: Humor, Iowa, life in the meadow

Cleaning the Lint Trap

Sherry — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 16:09:17 +0000

Well, we have almost made it to the end of the year. Only a few more precious hours to go before we turn the page. As Keith would say, “congratulations on making it through another year of this crap.”

Now, I am no expert, but I’ve long been of the opinion that most mental illness is caused by an inability to clear out the attic. And no finer time is there for that job than at the end of the year.

Because tomorrow, I’m gonna start making some goodies for the New Year (appetizers are my New Year’s day menu), I thought today would be the day to flick off pieces of lint that have been gummin’ up the old synapses.

So in no particular order:

I sympathize with the folks of Samoa who have skipped today and are moving on to Saturday. I mean think of all the havoc being played out. No doubt somebody had an appointment to having an annoying growth removed from their chin, or somebody was getting married or things of that order. What are they supposed to do? At my age, giving up a day is very serious business. I would have voted no.
I have to tell you, one of the reasons I have watched the GOP debates (which takes that whole subject to a new low) is to look over the audience and wonder who the hell are these people? Can they afford all those people they must need to dress them and feed them each day? Such people who look to any of that stage of stooges to lead them out of even a corn maze, are barking up the wrong tree.
It’s been unseasonably warm here in Iowa this winter. I’d like to think it’s a goodbye present from the state to me. I suspect it has more to do with global warming. To all those folks who claim that all they do is for their children and then say that global warming is but a hoax, I say this: I hope you live to see your children vilify you for gifting them with a dying planet.
I have one very serious compulsion I’ve never told you about. I want to make ciabatta bread–I mean the kind you get at the bakery, with gigantic holes. I’m on about my eighth attempt today. Terms like “pulling away from the sides” and “glistening like toothpaste” and “dimpling the surface” are old hat to me. Wish me luck.
I want to thank each and every one of you, both for being alive and visiting me often and entering into my madness. I want to thank all of you who blog and keep me laughing and thinking. I want you to know that there really are no such things as virtual friends. There are friends. And I count all of you as such.
Jesus was a pretty smart fellow. He knew that even among thieves and nere-do-wells, a certain honor existed and people paid their debts and returned borrowed lawn mowers. He often told his followers that to do as much was not enough, because “even the tax collectors do that much.” No, Christians, and indeed all of us are really judged by how much we step out of our own self-interest and do something for others. God knows there are enough folks out there in need. Children around the world, Muslims maligned for being Muslims, our LGBT friends, immigrants being threatened by draconian intrusive laws. Pick your poison and dedicate next year to helping your fellow human.
Never under-estimate the power of a pet to teach you things you are better off knowing. We still miss our Brandy terribly and a day never goes by when she is not thought about, or mentioned in our ongoing lives. She taught us a lot about being human, and that’s a pretty amazing thing for an animal to be able to do.
If you smile more than you frown you are way out in front.
Writing is nothing more than thinking with your fingers. So said Issac Asimov.
I have really had a lot of fun with my food blog. Mostly because I don’t do anything there except post recipes. I’ve been pushed, mostly by myself, to solve a lot of recipe problems. I now have the “perfect” lasagna, a to-die-for corn casserole, and finally I solved the “too-dry” mystery of mac and cheese. Maybe this seems inconsequential to you, but “hey, ma, I’m the queen of the world.” Well, not quite, I still have that stinkin’ ciabatta bread to work out.
One really good thing I learned this year? Crazy, sci-fi shows on the mainstream ABCV or Event, but I am likely to get a resolution on Fringe and Sanctuary. Of course none of this matters if you are smart enough to avoid TV with regularity.
I continue to be amazed that so little in the way of intellectual capability is required to function in society in some fashion. I think that every time I get done reading Blaze and Daily Caller comments. I also realize how truly poor our educational system is, since most of these morons matriculated through our public education. The few who didn’t were homeschooled by idiots who had themselves barely escaped the public system with sheepskin in hand.
I trust scientists more than politicians, but then I trust hairdressers more than politicians. In fact I trust rhesus monkeys more than politicians. The only person I trust fully (Contrarian excepted of course) is Johnny Depp. :/

Okay, so I feel lighter and free once again. Ready to start this craziness all over again next year?

Well, God willing and the creek don’t rise, we will be alive and so will have no choice.

I’ll try to post a few cute pics tomorrow. I’m not cooking THAT hard or long.

Toodles!

Filed under: Brain Vacuuming, Humor, Iowa, Life in the Meadow Tagged: Humor, Iowa, life in the meadow, vacuuming the brain

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