Category Archives: teabaggers

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Don’t Steel This Idea! Or Steal it Either

tea-bag_628x434Okay, so I was thinking yesterday. This is not unusual with me, I usually do. Remember that episode of Star Trek where the machine sucked out your thoughts? And with nothing to think about the poor soul in the machine did not reach the state of Nirvana in perfect communion with God, but rather died from lack of anything to do?  You remember right?

tos-daggerofthemind6See, this really produced a conflict with me. I understand that perfect meditation requires an “emptying of the mind” yet, Star Trek in Daggers of the Mind informs me that it can cause death. So, I have always decided to err on the side of keeping my mind active rather than tempt God to just say, “nothing going on in there” and pull the plug.

Which then raises the second quandary for me. I know a ton of people with “nothing going on in there” and they seem to still VOTE and worse yet, LEGISLATE.

So I have no idea which is true.

So I was thinking, as I said.

And I got this perfect idea. Well, to be honest, it wasn’t exactly my idea, but I don’t know who Theor27 is so it might as well be my idea, since anybody who goes by the screen name Theor27 probably doesn’t have the connections I have to promote this idea properly, and anyway Theor27 just sorta mentioned it, and didn’t flesh it out like I have, and that has to count for something, right? I mean I respect  work product and all that, but I’m pretty sure if you sort through my massive subconscious, you would find this idea there, and that’s pretty close to be an original idea” don’t you think? Do you have any idea how many recipes I see that are exact, I mean down to every word that don’t mention that they got the idea from somebody else, but rather pass it off as their own. Doesn’t everybody start off their brownie recipe with “best darn brownies this side of Saturn”?

So given that good old Theor27 probably will never know, I’m claiming this idea in full as my own. Since I fleshed it out, as I said.

So, I’m thinking along the lines of a Sim city interface, or perhaps a board game. Or perhaps something more along the “miniature” railroad thing. You know what I mean surely. The old guy down the block whose entire basement is a little town with a railroad that runs all around, with miniature trees and overpasses and, even a lake? THAT guy? Or the lady who every Christmas turns her spare bedroom into a village with cotton ball “snow” and a post office, and carolers and little painted houses with little tiny lights inside? You know, THAT lady?

So this will be called: Tea Party Town. And you can make it up as you like. You see? Cheney+figure

I’m just letting my mind flow here guys.

You could have like a “lake of fire” and a big old hand that you could automate to let go of little liberal action figures and drop them into it. It would be God (the hand that is) dropping the bad bad liberals into the lake of eternal damnation for all the things they want to do, like be communists or fascists (since tea baggers generally don’t know the difference) or being for “choice” or for Obamacare, or for wanting to “redistribute the wealth”. You know, whatever dumb thing teabaggers dream up for killin’ and condemning for all time anybody not like them.

There could be a big museum and out front Jesus could be sitting atop a big old Brontosaurus teaching the flock.

JesusHow cool would that be? All the people could be wearing little tri-corner hats with little teabags hanging from them.

Everybody would be white of course.

Except for the grounds keepers, and the maids, and the bus drivers.

cartoon_guest_worker_auction_large

 

 

 

 

So, that takes care of some of the bigger plans for our Tea Party village.

But no such place would be really “home” if it didn’t have some actual Tea Party homes.

So you could, you know, fashion the decor as it suits your version of Tea Party heaven.

sarah_palin_dollOf course you should have Sarah greeting all the visitors to the neighborhood.

I mean she fits in here so well doncha think?

I big ol’ happy smile on her perky face.

Welcoming all you nice tea party friends, and makin’ sure as you drive by that you are the right complexion.

biblesPick up a bible as you enter, so you’ll be sure to know how to act now!

As you enter, don’t forget to notice how nice everything is, all the same. Nobody here likes to be “different” because God doesn’t like different. It says so, somewhere in the Good Book.  Or is certainly implied if you get my drift.

trailer-park But for sure, in your village of Tea Baggerdom, don’t forget the most important place of all.

Or not.

It really depends.

Some tea baggers don’t cotton to no formalized church you know. They found that it in the bible too. Anybody can just read “God’s word”. Long as it’s the King James Version that is. The rest are just Satanic verse, to pun.

Don’t listen to no word of men, they say. God said it, ‘nuf said.

Or not.

If you are one of them churched teabaggers, then you probably should have one of these:

MegaChurch3The Mega Church solves all your problems, and meets all your needs. From indoctrinating the lit’lins into proper creationist, flatlander, young earthiness, to making sure that your will suitably leaves all your money to the church, it’s one for all and all for one.

Common phrases you will hear are:

  • Love the sinner, hate the sin.
  • God hates sinners.
  • God helps those who help themselves.
  • If they don’t work, they don’t eat.
  • Are you born again?
  • Have you confessed Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?
  • Handups not handouts!
  • Fornication is a sin, but God forgives!
  • Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!

Well-regulatedMilitiaDon’t forget this important place.

You will be spending a lot of time here, looking, touching, nay caressing the fine barrels of these beautiful killers.

There is no more important Amendment to the constitution (how it wasn’t listed as the first ARTICLE of the constitution beats me, than the 2nd?

SECOND?

You see, this constitution is all F**ked up isn’t it?

I mean I’m sure the Founding Fathers meant:

ARTICLE I: We are a Christian nation!

ARTICLE II: God wants us to use guns to enforce that!

All the rest is mere filler.

 

amd-doll1-jpgA little humor in your Tea Party village is always good.

For she is NOT A WITCH.

She said so.

Witches cannot lie. That is a lie.

That’s a whole ‘nother Star Trek show.

I don’t want to go there.

Christine O’Donnell made my head hurt.

SimiMoorparkTeaPartyLogoDoes this mean that somebody has beat me to the punch?

All this work?

And somebody has already got a Sim’s Tea Park?

I am crestfallen.

Nay I am deeply chagrined.

Nay, I am pissed.

This was MY IDEA.

I was gonna make a billion bucks off this. Hasbro on speed dial. Gates wanted it as a Microsoft Windows standard game. I just know it.

Sigh………..

I suppose you expect me to do something productive now?

And I had the decor all picked out in my Hawaiian beach house. I did. Really. No I did.

 

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And the Nominee for STUPID is. . . .The GOP

bobbyjOh my head hurts. I mean seriously people, the list of nominees for MOST STUPID is the most widely contested race of all.

Shall we poll the Internet denizens?

Here are some of the nominees. Feel free to add any you can think of. The winner will receive a dead fish wrapped in the NYTimes, delivered by a pony express rider wearing a Dior gown of sparkling crystals.

1. Proving that he can’t read, Governor Scott Walker of Wisconsin says he will sign a new bill requiring an ultrasound of any pregnant woman seeking an abortion. Having learned nothing from what happened in Virginia when Governor McDonnell also planned to sign the same sort of thing, Walker announces that “I don’t have any problem with ultrasound”. No I guess HE doesn’t. But perhaps if it were required that all men who decide to treat women like children and tell them what to do with their own bodies, should undergo a lobotomy, he might, just might, change his tune. But then again, maybe not.

2. Arizona House Representative, Trent Franks resurrected the old “rape victims block the pregnancy” argument of Todd Akin, stating the “incidence of pregnancy following rape is very low.”  This was in support of a bill introduced by Franks making abortion illegal after 20 weeks. Democrats had introduced an amendment making an exception for rape and incest. It appears that Republican man are raised to believe that they are doctors by osmosis. It’s a male thing.

sarah-palin-stupid-republican-quotes-dumb-republicans-best-republican-quotes 3. So utterly against any immigration bill are some Republicans that they don’t even want to debate the issue. The reasons are obvious. The final bill may well pass the Senate, and then it’s on the House where Boehner will wring his hands and insist that he’s only there to help the House speak it’s will. The likes of Steve King and Louis Gohmert and Steve Stockton, will provide the show there. For now this group joins in a team effort to win the golden smelly carp award: Sens. John Barrasso (Wyo.), John Boozman (Ark.), Mike Crapo (Idaho), Ted Cruz (Tex.), Mike Enzi (Wyo.), Charles E. Grassley (Iowa), James Inhofe (Okla.), Mark Kirk (Ill.), Mike Lee (Utah), James Risch (Idaho), Pat Roberts (Kan.), Tim Scott (S.C.), Jeff Sessions (Ala.), Richard Shelby (Ala.) and David Vitter (La.). A finer band of brothers in stupid cannot be found.

4. Virginia Lieutenant Governor nominee, E. W. Jackson wrote a book, and published it. It is called The Ten Commandments to an Extraordinary Life. Trouble is, he misspelled Commandments to Comandments in the title. Then he said that yoga would lead to satanic possession.

5. Jim Bridenstine (R-OK) is somebody you probably never heard of. I suspect you can continue to not hear of him. He took to the floor last week in the House and ranted on about how the President was “a vengeful liar who lacks the moral compass” to lead the nation. He likened himself to Patrick Henry. He thinks he did a good job. Trouble is, I guess he forgets that the polls suggests he may be the one without a moral compass. It’s improper to cast such vitriol on the House floor. But alas it’s nothing new for the crazy crew. And by the by, all his reasoning was based on factual untruths. ALL of them. So I guess he’s intellectually impaired on top of being a flagrant abuser of the mouth.

6. Darrell Issa claimed through selected editing of testimony, that the order to select “conservative” applications for tax-exempt status came “from Washington”. He promised that the full transcripts would be released shortly. Of course the full transcripts said just about the opposite. The person who has owned up to the screening methodology, describes himself as a Conservative Republican and says he doesn’t believe there was any political motivation in the process, but merely a method to extract those applications that would undoubtedly necessitate deeper analysis. Issa now claims that release of the full transcripts would be “dangerous and irresponsible.” He now claims it is Cummings who is the problem.

Santorum_dunce17. Now I admit, this is not a Republican. But well, we have loved Carl Levin for many years. But we are pretty darn happy he’s decided to retire. He voted to keep the decision-making on rape charges in the hands of command. It was wrong. He sided with the military men. It was wrong. This kind of thing makes no sense on any level. It doesn’t promote cohesion in the ranks. It promotes distrust. Shame on him. And on Clare McCaskill who also voted this way.

So that’s my line up for today.

As I said, please add your favorites.

It’s hard to miss a week without Gohmert being on the list I know.

But he’ll be back in the top ten. He won’t let us down.

don-young-wetback-comments-immigrationSo.

Vote.

Vote often.

oops

 

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Franken-Women! Run For Your Lives!

elsa-and-boris-in-the-bride-of-frankensteinDuring the run up to the 2012 election, the GOP became rather famous for sticking their foot into their collective mouths, up to the knee. Nothing was more famous than their “war on women” an attack they assured us was both unfair and unwarranted.

After all, as countless state legislatures populated mostly by white men, continued to introduce bill after bill that limited the availability of reproductive health care for women, inserted medical instruments into their lady parts, and otherwise suggested that they didn’t really know what was best for themselves, how can that be considered unwomanly?

To say nothing of the strange and mind-shattering medical opinions from men like Todd Aiken on rape. On and on it went, yet, there was no war on women, but in the minds of Democrats who were just playing on the (shh) paternal concerns of husbands and fathers for political benefit. And on and on they went. On election night, 55% of women in America decided that Democrats best served their interests.

That still leaves an amazing 44% of women who voted for the other side, the side doing all the woman-basing.  What can we say about these women? I think we are learning that in the months since the election. In fact, we have always known it, but we grant some leeway that in the heat of battle, some women may in fact grip their thighs and support that which rankles for the “greater good.” So a fairer assessment can be given now.

And it suggests, that what we have is a hybrid creature I have dubbed the Franken-woman. She is in appearance a woman,  but resembles her sisters in very little else. I’m afraid if you look under the skirt, you may well find balls instead of a vagina.

stepford Recently there was some polling by Pew which I believe backs up studies on the subject, that women are increasingly the breadwinners in their families. This of course caused quite a stir. There has been a four-fold increase in the numbers since the 1960′s.

How is this received by the media you ask?

Well Fox News contributor, Erick Erickson cried foul. This is bad stuff he claimed. Everywhere in the animal kingdom (watch out your creationists), males dominate (actually they don’t but he’s from Fox, what can you expect). Why this flood of women breadwinners is destroying marriage and the children! Stop it now!

Of course women are used to this sort of thing.

Soon the topic turned to education and why we are falling farther and farther behind when compared to a whole list of other countries. Once the greatest school system in the world, the US educational system is by many estimations, dismal at best. Mississippi Governor, Phil Bryant (need I add the R?), gave us his assessment of the cause:

I think both parents started working. And the mom is in the work place.

Women are so used to this sort of thing. I hardly matters the topic, somehow it’s the fault of women.

I can attest to this personally.

A while back on Facebook I became engaged in rather heated debate on climate change with a man who was regularly condescending and arrogant in his assertions that there was no such thing as human-made climate change. While both of us threw some nasty ad hominens, he often retorted to my facts with  claims that I had a big mouth, and was a whack job. When I replied that apparently he had no facts, just personal assaults, I was greeted with this gem:

You provoke me!

Indeed, and women who dress in trashy clothes provoke otherwise decent men to rape them! Yes, we’ve heard that excuse.

Well my dismay was not at his remark, which was expected, but rather from the Franken-woman who came to his defense, saying that X was such a nice person, and I was always attacking, and basically, I was up against a brilliant man and was clearly no match.

Now said Franken-woman had already told me that:

  1. If you count all the “crab nebula” historically, it amounts to just the number one would expect if the earth was some 6,000 plus years old and,
  2. If evolution were true then why are monkeys still having monkey babies?

So you see I’m already dealing with a “woman” who if chosen randomly by an alien visitation would have answered the question, “is there intelligent life here?” with a resounding NO. What hurt however was that a supposedly a fellow woman was unable to see the misogyny in such a statement and agreed that women “cause” men to do bad things.

But as I listened to what moves through the Internet vapor, I discovered that there were indeed plenty of these Franken-women.

That gadfly Phyllis Schafley, attorney, book writer, and speaker, you know, the one who tells OTHER women to stay home and make hubby happy with good cookin’ and good sex? THAT “woman?” Well she weighed in on women in combat, telling us that women in combat would unfairly “entice” men, and the poor men would be blamed for the ensuing rape and harassments that would be inevitable! I kid you not.

Marsha Blackburn, perennial talking points maven for the GOP, had the audacity to tell Meet the Press, roundtable participants that “women don’t want equal pay laws.”  Seriously? We don’t?

“I think that more important than that is making certain that women are recognized by those companies. You know, I’ve always said that I didn’t want to be given a job because I was a female, I wanted it because I was the most well-qualified person for the job. And making certain that companies are going to move forward in that vein, that is what women want. They don’t want the decisions made in Washington. They want to be able to have the power and the control and the ability to make those decisions for themselves.”

Um, dear, how exactly are we to make that happen? By baking them some cookies? Or perhaps, forcing them to address their inequality by MAKING THEM PAY WOMEN THE SAME WAGES? And dear, don’t you EVER presume to speak for me, okay?

Not to be outdone, Ms. Schafley weighed in on this as well:

The Obama feminists recite the tiresome mantra that women are paid only 77 cents for every dollar paid to men. That’s completely false because it doesn’t take into account that men take many high-risk and unpleasant jobs, suffering 90 percent of occupational fatalities, so they should earn more.

Does that even make sense? She then claims (without a source) that men work longer hours and so deserve more. In the end, only employers can really know who does the “most” work.

She ends by taking a swipe at Hispanics. Stop courting them, she advises. After all, “they don’t share American values“.

I say congratulations to the GOP who has apparently successfully transplanted a Republican male brain into a woman. These aren’t women. These are freaks of nature, created to pat the poor man on the head and continue to tell him he is the center of their universe.

Save me from such women.

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Oh, Michele, Say It Ain’t So–Or the Crazy Meets the Wall

bachmannOh my goodness, my goodness, as Shirley Temple often said. Or perhaps a band of munchkins is more to your liking, “ding, dong, the wicked witch is dead.” Figuratively of course. Whatever you flavor of bygonedom, an era of crazy as in bat shit crazy is about to end. You won’t have Michele to kick around any more as Tricky Dick was wont to glower.

I could go on, but you no doubt know I have more pithy comments left to make. Soooo, I was grumbling, sitting on the side of the bed, dangling a pair of panties and searching valiantly for my toe to hook ‘em, when the Contrarian rushed in, “let me be the first to tell ya sweetie. Michele Bachmann isn’t going to run for re-election.”

Well, that almost made my day, although a 2 1/2 mile walk and a trip to the pool followed by three shopping stops still loomed large in my rear view mind. All sorts of stuff started racing through my head as I tried to figure out how a Bachmann-free world would look, feel, nay even smell like.

I scoured the Internet and managed to find all this information for your perusal.

Since she started out by assuring us that it had nothing to do with her Democratic opponent, you can assume it had EVERYTHING to do with her Democratic opponent. I mean she had already started running ads. The fact that that pesky investigation about how she mismanaged her campaign finances wouldn’t go away probably had something to do with it too.

I am told that Louis Gohmert and Steve King were heartbroken. No more weird teapotter sex in the cloak room with the ever vivacious and eye-spinning girl wonder for them. You do NOT want to know what teapotter sex consists of, trust me. People who have snuck in between the coats to spy on the threesome (de rigueur in teapotter circles), have been known to lose their eyesight. Nobody thought you could put THAT, THERE and live I tell ya.

Anyway, insiders suggest that there were some private reasons why Ms. Bachmann decided to hang up her Congressional spurs at this time.

  • She was heartbroken when Speaker Boehner told her that she had not won a seat on the Intelligence Committee because  of her, you know, intelligence. Actually it all started as a joke and well, it got out of hand.
  • Various members of the Armed Services called to testify at hearings, threatened to commit hara kiri if she asked them one more stupid question.
  • Marcus’ reparative therapy had been going really well until marriage equality passed in Minnesota. Thereafter he could be heard roaming their Minnesota home intoning, “free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, I’m free at last.”
  • Michele was told that the campaign finance money she spent on her “wandering eye” surgery was not deductible as an “expense”.
  • Her most lucrative engagement–speaking at Tea Party events was about to dry up as the last Teapotters get ready to close up shop. Sarah advised her to get in on the speaking tours while the getting was good. Grifters do as much for other grifters it seems.
  • It was explained to her that Obamacare was still the law of the land and no amount of clicking her heels together would change that.
  • A little-known House rule requires a Congressperson to step down after eight years of introducing absolutely no bills that weren’t laughed at by the House cleaning staff.
  • It was about to get out that she had copies of Chippendales on Display” in her desk drawer–AND the pages were very very worn.
  • She’s joining a new group headed up by Christine “I’m not a witch” O’Donnell, Sarah “I’m still relevant” Palin, and other failed TeaWomen, to offer their services as Public Relations experts.
  • She always wanted to be a end-times preacher in her heart of hearts.
  • Let’s face it, Phyllis Schlafley is getting really really old and somebody has to travel around the country, get paid tens of thousands all the while spreading the message that God wants women to stay home and support their flaccid husbands. After all, they didn’t get flaccid all by themselves, it takes a ball-buster of a woman to do that, except of course unless he’s a closeted gay.

Meanwhile,  the Contrarian has wired the entire house so that every television and Tivo box is tied together. I don’t understand the science behind all this, but I’m assured that I can turn on any TV just by pushing “puree” on my blender and I can change channels by pressing “steam” on my iron. No amount of glazed-over eyes prevents him from explaining the math of all this to me over and over again. I prefer to simply say. . . .”the Internet is like a series of tubes through which little busses carrying electrical bundles careening through intersections dump their loads at rail crossings, and yelling ‘bingo’ at regular intervals, all resulting in my getting the channel I want when I want it.”

Signing off from this tube relay platform until later.

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The Stupid Chronicles: May 25, 2013

EW_Jackson1 The catch of the week is E. W. Jackson, nominated by the great state of Virginy GOP’ers to be the next Lieutenant Governor along with already pretty darn crazy Ken Cucchinelli. Terry McCauliffe’s chances of taking the governorship just went up exponentially.

Some say that during the nominating convention, when Jackson started to get too much support, rational Republicans moved to support Jackson as about the only feasible way to show the insane Teatottlers that they were a doomed bunch who had to be purged of the Grand OLD Party. Did not Bobby Jindal say the same when he urged the party to stop being the party of stupid. Stupid we all know means teabibber gibberish.

They truly don’t get much nuttier than the dear Reverend who once referred to the original constitution’s 3/5 clause was an “anti-slavery clause”, which is, as anybody in their freakin’ right mind knows, a serious distortion of history to say the least.

In Jackson, the Republicans have, what they always wish for, another good House Negro: a black man (they don’t use the term African-American in conservative circles) who will turn his back on his own race and accept the grateful crumbs of the extreme right, who will parade him around as their “proof” that they aren’t racist. The usual suspects are touting him as their new savior–because he has “American” values and doesn’t “play the race card”–all now euphemisms for “we got us a darkie who will dance to our tune”. The Manassa Tea Party joyfully reported that the biggest applause line for Jackson at the nomination convention was his proud assertion that “I’m not an African-American, I’m an American.”

Here are some of the delightful things that Mr. Jackson has had to say about, well lots of things.

  1. He once compared Planned Parenthood to the KKK, apparently buying into the right-wing extremist claim that PPH is designed and devoted to black genocide, one baby at a time. Such of course is sheer nonsense, and given that these same reactionaries are opposed to every and all efforts to feed, educate and maintain with health care these same black babies once born, one can dismiss the argument as sheer hyperbole.
  2. He of course is also on the band wagon chiming in with the usual House Negro complaint that African-Americans who vote Democratic are nothing but plantation negroes.
  3. He has claimed that the President has a Muslim view of the world. He gets this weird notion from a speech in which Obama used the term “Muslim world”–a term Jackson claims is “only” used by the Muslim Brotherhood and other radical groups. I mean who can argue with day-care logic of that level?
  4. He has made claims that gays are “perverted” and “very sick people psychologically, mentally, and emotionally.” He has tweeted that gays are “ikky“.  He has said that same-sex marriage will lead to bestiality, claiming Adam and Steve will become Adam and the bull.  
  5. He has asserted that the “Democratic agenda is worthy of the anti-Christ.”
  6. Jackson maintains that President Obama doesn’t believe in the constitution and is intent upon setting up a lawless dictatorship.

Cucchinelli, who has already been trying to tone down his own TeaFoolish connections to appeal to, you know, normal people, is already apparently claiming that he doesn’t have to defend his new BFF, Jackson. I shouldn’t wonder why.

Normal, rational mainstream Republicans are utterly taken aback. Michael Steele is alleged to have said, “Is the Virginia GOP trying to engage in a ‘How to lose an election 101?’” But not so the crazies. No, they are alive and well. I’ll give you a sample of what the great uninformed and basically stupid are saying:

  • E. W. Jackson is an awesome, and highly qualified person. (No relation to Jesse obviously) ( WND)  If you didn’t know, Jesse Jackson is the poster child for unacceptable Negro in he Teadrippers pantheon of bad Negroes. JJ plays the “race card” meaning he stands up for African-American rights in a racist world, something that the average Teasniffer disavows as uncomfortably directed at them.
  • Love that Ewwwwww Jackson. Just love him. We should just give him all of our white daughters. You know. Cuz whites are all a bunch of immasculated panty-waists thanks to threats of being charged with racism and hate crimes if you ever call a spade a spade or demand equal protection from the most criminal elements in our society. Go ahead. Give him your vote. You won’t be getting your country back by voting anyway. (WND) Have no clue what this person even means. But nobody much suggests that TeaSniffers can write sentences that are understandable.
  • Republican principles, however, are centred on individual initiative, freedom, and responsibility, something which ethnics don’t quite understand. (WND)  I can only assume that being a House Negro makes you somehow not “ethnic”. Neat trick.
  • How long before he is labeled a “token” by the left or “not authentically black” by what qualifies as leadership within the liberal African-American Community? (Breitbart)  Ummm, they already did dude. That was back before you ever heard his name and jumped on to make him your new black boy.
  • The Tea Party is completely open to having successful and talented Republican black men and women in the party but the Demonrat/Media racist hate machine usually destroys them before we stand a chance. Wait for the flood gates to open on this guy too. It’s probably already started. Hope America wakes up to the evil that is the modern “retroprogressive”. (Breitbart) Oh what is a retroprogressive? I think I might want to be one of those.
  • Granted, there were not that many minorities attending, but I’m hoping E.W. will be a bridge to that community.(Breitbart) Yes, it’s a well-known fact that Negroes vote by skin color. No doubt all the fine negroes in Virginia will line up for all the fine things he offers to bring them in terms of policy. Dang, will somebody stop making pigs fly? Or at least not feed them before sending them airborne?

We give to Mr. E. W. Jackson congratulations on his fine winning of the nomination. We hope that all of Virginia will give a warm pot of piss to the TeaBooglers and their racist, homophobic, bible-chewing rhetoric come election day.

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There’s a Scandal Alright–Just Not Where You Think

committee I’ve long wondered at the seeming inability of the GOP to remember that we actually keep records of  “that stuff”. They continue to forget that. I give a pass to the typical TeaPotter who is so ill-informed that they are left with nothing but misspelled phrases that they either paint on cardboard signs or attempt to regurgitate from memory. They can’t be expected to actually, you know, KNOW history.

As you know doubt know, the GOP has been looking for a way for five long years now to bury this president. All of their schemes have come to naught for quite obvious reasons, but even when we thought things might, just might, return to some semblance of normalcy after their debacle of 2012, well, sadly they learned nothing.

Some of their own kind (Pat Toomey)  even admit, that their membership so hates this man that they will vote NO on legislation as publicly supported as universal background checks. So of course we expected that rottweiler of a thug, Darrell Issa to continue his determination to find SOMETHING that can bring down this administration.

Benghazi was their choice, aided and abetted by one John S. McCain, who had a personal vendetta and was more than willing to rattle the sabre of “coverup” at least as it pertained to Susan Rice, a woman we can now categorically say was unfairly maligned and mistreated by Johnny and his misogynist guy pal, Ms. Lindsey.

Let me just say this simply. The Benghazi “scandal” is nothing more than a witch hunt. And history explains it all to us.

Darrell “my brother did it” Issa is chairman of the Committee on Oversight and Government Reform. That is, innocent as it sounds, a very powerful committee, and one Issa has used since 2010 when he assumed chairmanship, to conduct endless hearings into the Obama administration, hoping to find ANYTHING that can be used to harass and drive from office the Negro in the White House.

It is also the only committee that is allowed to issue subpoenas under the chairman’s signature only. However, this has seldom been the practice. Normally, given that grave power, the Chairman has sought the agreement of a full committee vote before so proceeding. This has been  the case except for only two occasions in modern times. Hint: this is where the history gets important.

The most notable occasion when the Chairman took sole control over subpoenas was under the chairmanship of Dan Burton, (R-IN). Mr. Burton had a serious case of the ass against one William J. Clinton. Like Darrell, Dan fairly lit up the committee with his constant and outlandish claims of wrongdoing.

This resulted in a scandal of course–Mr. Burton spend years, over 1,000 subpoenas, and 7 million bucks of taxpayer money, trying to prove that there was scandal to be found in the fund-raising practices of the Democratic Campaign organization. Copies of audio tapes from a “witness” were released. Later it was determined that the tapes had been severely “edited” to appear quite different from their original content. Burton fired committee staff man David Bossie, the supposed “editor”.

However, the scandal went further, and finally, there were calls for Burton to step down himself. He never did of course.

Well, here we go again.

Mr. Issa decided that Burton’s sole possessor of the subpoena was a good thing,  and re-instituted the practice again. This brought a rather lengthy and well-reasoned letter from Elijah Cummings, ranking minority leader on the committee, and a man with a memory. He pointed out that unilateral usage of the power of subpoena had gotten the GOP into serious trouble once before, and it was better to return to the normal and regular practice of bipartisan issuance of these orders.

Of course, Mr. Issa declined rational behavior and has as we all know run a one-man-show of Obama attack. And the expected result has occurred.

For weeks the GOP has harped that the Obama White House was engaged in a cover-up regarding Benghazi. That cover-up has never been spelled out well, but it seems to have revolved around the White House changing the talking points (which implicated Rice somehow), to protect the State Department (and Hillary Clinton) from being accused of malfeasance.

This claim was bolstered by information from e-mails circulated between the  parties involved. We were told this by the GOP. Jonathan Karl broke the story for ABC, claiming as the GOP had alleged, that State Department officials had participated in changing the talking points, along with the White House. Karl implied that he had seen the emails himself and “quoted” from them.

When the true emails were brought forth, they told a different story–one that indicated that neither the White House nor the State Department had played a part in the versions discussed and finally issued by the CIA for distribution (i.e. to Susan Rice).  Now of course Karl claims he never actually saw any e-mails but his “source” shared “notes” with him of what he/she read.

The fair meaning  of what Karl claimed and the actual truth leave little doubt that there was a deliberate attempt to portray the White House and State Department in a bad light and to provide proof that they had acted politically with the intent to deceive. Since the e-mails were the subject of subpoenas, the likely “source” is undoubtedly someone on Issa’s committee.

It is ironic in the end that all this Benghazi “scandal” has been in part to dirty the White House, but also to begin the long process of discrediting Mrs. Clinton. While nobody is all that surprised by the GOP’s doing that, it must be remembered that when all efforts were directed toward destroying the President, the GOP actually held Mrs. Clinton up as the “ray of sunshine” in the otherwise dismal Obama landscape.

Now that the President seems invincible to their machinations, Clinton, the new threat, became the new target.

It’s all so predictable.

And that is what needs be investigated it seems–why are my tax monies being used to manufacture scandals for Republican political gain?

Riddle me that Batman.

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The Benghazi Hustle

benghazi-hearings-hdb-1-4_3_rx383_c540x380Here we go again. Everybody hold tight because this merry-go-round is speeding around the curve and headed for–well just about anything that the GOP imagination can dream up.

In a valiant attempt to turn a mole hill into a mountain, Republican Tea Snorters are busy twisting and feigning shock and awe at the shameful and deliberate attempt by the Obama Administration to get “brave Americans” murdered by, well, you know, their true friends.

If one reads the headlines of the extreme-stream media, here is what you will find:

“Benghazi Witness: First Time in my Career that a Diplomat Has more balls than somebody in the Military.”

“Benghazi revelations today could obliterate Obama’s Credibility and Sink Hillary’s 2016 ambitions.”

“Issa seeks more whistle blowers after dramatic Benghazi hearing.”

“Two key witnesses refuse to testify at Benghazi hearing.”

“Benghazi Makes Watergate look like kindergarten: The End of Obama”

“Hillary perjured herself on Benghazi?”

“Benghazi Whistleblower: You Should have Seen what Clinton Tried to do to us that night.”

And on and on it goes.

Here’s what I think we know at this point.

  1. A YouTube video riled up Muslims around the world and demonstrations were being held in a variety of places, Egypt among them.
  2. A demonstration occurred at Benghazi, that was violent.
  3. Ambassador Stevens was fairly well known to favor less security rather than more in an attempt to be open to the residents of the country.
  4. Republicans had steadfastly refused State Department requests for more money to beef up security around the world.
  5. The Ambassador and three others were killed in the first attack.
  6. Air support could not have reached the outpost for hours, a minimum of 5-7 according to the military.
  7. There was no basis for suspecting a second attack.
  8. There were no deaths or serious injuries sustained in the second attack.
  9. A team of FOUR, a military security forces was located at Tripoli but they were concerned about security there, and even John Bolton admitted that they were unable to determine whether the four men should leave that facility for Benghazi when the deaths had already occurred and there was no reason to suspect a second attack.
  10. Senator Tom Corker from Tennessee, sat on the Senate hearings on Benghazi and said that he read all the material and thought he knew what happened and was satisfied.
  11. The President termed the attack a “terrorist attack” the day following the attack.
  12. That Susan Rice delivered the cautionary remarks that we were unsure what happened based on material supplied her by others in the State Department or other agencies.
  13. That Al Qaeda is not an organization so much as an idea, and many Islamic groups claim “affiliation” without benefit of any actual connection. To this day, we don’t know I don’t think who this group consisted of.
  14. There was no reason to believe that naming it other than a terrorist attack was some how beneficial to the White House in the midst of an election. Most presidents, following some catastrophe or other see their polling improve as people tend to “rally round” the Administration. If the President had war mongered the event, the GOP would have been arguing just the opposite–that he was making it much worse than it was in order to gain sympathy.

The bottom line to me here is simply. The Benghazi outpost was under-secured. Certainly the GOP bears SOME responsibility for that fact as do congressional Democrats who agreed that they didn’t need additional funds. There was apparently not good plans in place for an emergency like this. There should have been.

Beyond that, it was a sad tragedy. But let us remember. Americans are dying around the world every day. They are dying in service to the country, and as employees of corporations doing business in dangerous places. These four were doing their jobs. They perhaps did not receive the full support they should have, but such is life in dangerous occupations. I don’t mean to minimize it, but it should not be overstated either.

The GOP tried to make this into some scandal during the fall of 2012 to hurt the chances of the President to be re-elected, and enhance their candidates chances. That didn’t happen. Now they see polling that suggests that Hillary Clinton, if the nominee will beat any Republican so far put forth, easily and soundly.

Is it hard to see why this is happening now? Of course not. This is just an attempt to dirty up Clinton and force her to not run.

That’s my take on it.

And what is yours?

Republicans are united in their insanity that this will lead to impeachment.

Do you?

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